Tastes Like Pig Feet: Flavor of Love 3, Episode 3
For The Love Of Flav (Meaning Career)
Nut loaf lunacy, here we are again. This week’s winner of the Tastes Like Crazy Comment of the Week Contest is ME for the subtitle of last week's recap: How do you spell crazy? F-L-A-V-E. I crack myself up.
White girl alert. White girl alert. Prancer thinks Ice is being fake and is there for her career. Some of the other girls agree. Ice hasn’t made her career a secret and Flav already knows she’s not sure of her feelings towards him. Still, they plan to use this information against her. As if she has a chance at winning anyway. My prediction: Grayvee wins.
This week, Myammee decides to irk Flav more by making him, Big Rick, and all the other girls wait while she gets ready. The girls congregate in the hall to find out what their next challenge is. Myammee just got out of the shower. FF sends someone up to get her. She puts on a robe and comes down in full makeup. Flav says that today they will create a restaurant because it’s suddenly Top Chef. Oooh, is Tom Colicchio gonna show up? I love me some sexy bald chef Tom. Big Rick splits them into teams—Grayvee and Rayna (who I was calling Reyna last week but I don’t think it matters) are the captains.
Grayvee’s team is psyched because both she and Bunz can cook from scratch. They decide to call the restaurant Karma, after Flav’s son.
Rayna’s team is less thrilled. They hem and haw and come up with the name Flavas, showing that they either have no short term memory or they have no capacity to take in information and learn from it. Need I remind everyone that Flav hates that spelling? It’s not Flave. It’s not Flava. It’s Flavor Flav. Interesting how he spells Flavor correctly for his own name, yet he spells everything else incorrect, I’m guessing on purpose (I’m obviously in a charitable mood).
As some of the girls paint, Rayna, Windy City Shy, Grayvee, and Ice all go to the prop shop to get decorations. Rayna insists on being royal. She gets huge Egyptian mummy tomb statues and shimmery gold and purple cloths. WCShy wants to get a cuckoo clock and a reindeer. Rayna nixes the idea. Grayvee is aggravated with Ice who is on the cell phone in the limo and then in the shop, talking to people from the radio station she works at (from the sound of it, no one knows who she is at her job because she has to keep explaining herself—if that’s the case, Hil. Air. Eee. Us!). They collect a lot of Mardi Gras themed items and Ice decides to take the reindeer. WCShy tells Rayna that she will kill her if Flav likes the reindeer.
When the girls finish their restaurants, Flav and some guy from Zagat dine at each one. They go to Karma first. Thing 1 and Thing 2 take them to the table and both Flav and Zagat Guy are mesmerized at the twins. Flav loves the name. Zagat Guy asks what he thinks of the decor. He digs it. Zagat Guy asks about the Mardi Gras theme combined with the reindeer. Flav says he loves reindeer so it fits. Windy City Shy will now kill Rayna.
Seesinz welcomes them to Karma again and says she’s their server. Then Bunz comes out to serve them so Seesinz wasn’t needed for anything really. She gives them an appetizer of butterfly flavored wings. Zagat Guy thinks it’s too dry. Flav doesn’t seem to have a problem with them. Then shrimp, chicken, smoked sausage gumbo is next. Zagat Guy tells Flav that there’s so much salt that it’s almost inedible.
Flav and Zagat Guy go to Flavas and are met with Hotlanta giving them a rhyming welcome. Zagat Guy asks Flav if the decor is him and suggests it’s too subdued. Flav agrees it’s not his style. Myammee comes out wearing a shirt and no pants. She serves them Hennessey as an appetizer. Zagat Guy says that a married man is having a problem in this restaurant and Flav says that the lingerie isn’t family friendly. He doesn’t seem to mind that much himself though.
Then Flav notices the menu. He sees FLAVA. He gives Zagat Guy a spelling lesson and wants to rip up the paper. Myammee comes back with seafood alfredo pasta. It looks like barf. Zagat Guy says it’s a big dish. They have a hard time eating it. Zagat Guy says that if he ate the whole dish, he’d be dead. Flav thinks that’s a bad thing and tells Zagat Guy not to eat any more.
Prancer comes out in skate sneakers and gives them cheesecake for dessert. Zagat Guy asks if she baked it herself. She says it was pre-made. He asks where they got it from. She says, The Cheesecake Factory. Rayna says that Prancer shouldn’t have said anything. Maybe someone should have made the cake. Flav tells Zagat Guy that one of the girls will be Flav’s dessert.
Flav rounds up the girls and lets Zagat Guy give them his rating. He tells Karma that the wings weren’t good and the gumbo was salty but the decor was fun. Everyone likes reindeer.
He tells Flava that they made a grown-up restaurant, which doesn’t reflect Flav. The food was heavy but the Hennessey was fine.
Flav says that the winners are Karma. That was obvious. Grayvee gets a one-on-one date with Flav. The rest of the girls get a date with him the next day.
Windy City Shy asks Flav if he really loved the reindeer. She interviews that she knew all along that the reindeer was key. She’s going off the deep end soon.
Flav then scolds them for spelling the name of the restaurant FLAVA. They explain that they were trying to put a twist on it. He comes back with Flava is another guy. I wonder if he means that in general or if there is another guy named Flava. There probably is. Alas, my knowledge of the hip hop rap world is highly limited to this show, NY’s show, and The White Rapper Show. If Flava wasn’t on any of those, then I don’t know him.
Then he tells them that Myammee was in the car with him when he spelled his name to her on his date. The girls are pissed that Myammee spelled the name wrong even after having that chat. Rayna says that they lost because of the name and not the lack of reindeer.
Flav does his hair all special for his date with Grayvee. Yes, folks, he’s bringing back the high top. They go to Tony Roma’s because it’s classy. His words, not mine. Grayvee talks to him with meat in her mouth and I don’t understand a lot of what she says. I do understand her say, “I like pig feet. You like pig feet?” Flav tries not to throw up. He’s not interested. Grayvee tells him they’re good and he needs to try them. He says if he had known, he would have named her Pig Feet. He’s never going to try them because they smell like pig feet.
Time to hate on the white girl again. Ice receives a phone call from a radio station and she starts doing interviews from the house. She interviews that she wants to take her career as far as possible and is using the show for it. Then she interviews that she loves black men but Flav is not attractive. Thank you. Thank you so much, Ice. Thank you for pointing out that he resembles the broke down homeless tambourine man in Penn Station. Oh, wait, you didn’t say all that, but you were close.
Flav takes the rest of the Karma restaurant girls out on their date. He’s still sportin the high top and has the white sunglasses with the horns on them again. They go ice skating. He explains that ice skating was special for him as a kid.
Out on the ice is Scott Stewart—a professional ice skater wearing electric blue spandex. He tells them that they need jazz hands and personality. The first move is jazz hands while marching in place. Then they make a train. People fall. Flav wipes out a lot. Hard. Very hard. Blue Spandex thanks them for the great time and leaves.
Sinceer steals Flav away from the group. The girls on the bleachers think she’s telling him she’s not an alcoholic. Cut to Sinceer telling Flav that she’s not an alcoholic. Hil. Air. Eee. Us!
Flav goes for a rest and Seesinz and Sinceer start fighting on the bleachers. Sinceer then goes off on Bunz so Bunz goes back at her. Then some your momma comments start and Sinceer says, Your momma dead! Bunz says, My momma ain’t dead. However, her momma has a brain injury. Flav comes over and tells Sinceer she needs to calm down. He interviews that you don’t talk about someone’s momma if momma’s sick and he wonders if Sinceer is a good person.
They go back to the house. Flav makes some music in his room and Windy City Shy comes in to tell him that there are a lot of fake people there. She says that Rayna said that Rayna wants to make it to the top ten and that’s good enough. Flav finds Rayna to ask about her feelings and she gets misty eyed, talking about how he likes to hear about their feelings.
Flav makes more music and Big Rick brings Prancer to his door. She tells him that she had heard Ice on the radio talking about going on the show. Then she says Ice was on the phone with her radio station. He finds Ice and asks if she did a radio interview. She says no. Actually, that may be the truth. She was talking to someone who works at the station, but she wasn’t necessarily doing the interview. He asks if love brought her to the house. She says no. He asks if she has love. She says there could be. He kisses her and she leaves. She interviews that she will make out with him to get where she needs to be. Okay, on the one hand, hooray for her for showing that she’s there for publicity and being real about it. But booo for her for screwing with Flav’s emotions to get it. Then again, does Flav really expect to find love this way? I mean, he’s making music. He’s using this as publicity for himself.
Elimination Ceremony Time!
The first clock goes to Thing 1 and Thing 2. The next clock goes to Seesinz. The third is for Prancer. Number four is for Grayvee who makes him smile and laugh. They would make a good couple. The right amount of crazy.
The next clock is for Bunz. Shy gets the next one because she’s genuine. Meaning loud and obnoxious. Then Bee-Exx gets a clock and Big Rick yells out Bee-Exx!!! Hee heee. Hotlanta gets the next clock.
He calls Sinceer next. Instead of handing her a clock, he says that she owes Bunz an apology. If she can’t give her one, then he thinks she’s got a mean streak. Sinceer doesn’t want to but she apologizes. Bunz asks what she said and Sinceer says she said her momma’s dead and she knows what she said. Flav gives her a clock. He should wack her in the head with it. He says there’s a nice person inside of her. Yes, she probably kidnapped and killed that person and that’s where she’s hiding the body.
Next, Flav calls Ice. She’s all smiles. When she gets in front of him, he says, Your time is up. She thanks him for letting her be on his show and he asks if he can be on her radio show the next time he’s in Detroit. She said sure. They hug it out. She cries a little. Hotlanta is crying. Ice/Amana cries some more that she really did start to like him. No she didn’t. Not in that way. Backpedal backpedal backpedal.
Flav calls Myammee and Rayna up together. He says that any man that gets either one of them would be a lucky man. He tells Rayna that he’s really feeling Myammee. He says Rayna is a great person but her time is up. Rayna/Earaina (really, that’s how she spells her name) post-interviews that Flav wasn’t thinking right when he sent her home because he kept Drunk Sinceer and the played out Doublemint twins.
Myammee gets the last clock because we must not descriminate against those who have a spelling issue. Or an attention deficit disorder.
Have some more nut loaf: Enter the Tastes Like Crazy Comment of the Week Contest! Email me or chat in the forums.
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| Jamie |
Posted: 2008/2/27 12:12 Updated: 2008/2/27 12:12 |
Writer   Joined: 2008/2/21 From: Orland Park, IL Posts: 70 |
 Winner? "My prediction: Grayvee wins." Can it really be called winning if the prize is Flav and you have to go through your 15 minutes of fame being called Grayvee?  |
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| aniya606 |
Posted: 2009/7/10 16:32 Updated: 2009/7/10 16:32 |
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Posted: 2009/8/24 7:50 Updated: 2009/8/24 7:50 |
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