Starting Over 3, 01-26-06 – Changing The Two Lisasby LauraBelle
It's a big day for both Lisas in the Starting Over house. They both reach a pivotal point in their healing. Lisa1 may be reaching he final step to where she finally gets it, and Lisa2 is reaching that first realization of where she is going wrong. It only stands to reason that they end up helping each other reach these pivotal points.
Lisa1 sits in the living room with her crutches, explaining her parental crutches to Jodi and Kim. She tells them her parents bought her an apartment and gave their old furniture to Lisa1, so she didn't have to buy new. She says she's here to grow up. Jodi says sometimes grownups accept free things too. Well, if you know Lisa1, that isn't very helpful.
Jill and Lisa1 are instructed with the purple cards from Iyanla to take Lisa2 on a little field trip. Lisa2 is embarrassed enough doing these things in from of her housemates. She can't believe she'll now be expected to do it in public. Jill is instructed to have Lisa2 do whatever she wants to demonstrate the dangers of having others in control of your life.
Knowing that Lisa2 doesn't dance, Jill suggests she skip across the street, but Lisa complains of bad knees. Jill changes it up and suggests she curtsy across the street and back. Lisa2 decides she'd rather have her bad knees do the skipping. Jill has her flap her arms like a bird as she does so, and Lisa2 says she's starting to get pissed. Good. She says she doesn't even walk outside to her own mailbox, and now she's doing this on a Los Angeles street corner. At least Iyanla wasn't cruel enough to insist she wear the odd outfit picked out for her by strangers.
Jill then has a stranger at an outside cafe eating do the booty shake, and Lisa2 has to repeat it after her. Jill wants her to see if you give total control to others, they can do anything they want with it. Next, Lisa2 is instructed to stand on a balcony, yell out "I'm Queen of the World", and do her booty shake again. Jill is hoping she finds that voice she lost. When Lisa2 struggles, Jill shows her how. I think this might be a helpful exercise for Jill as well. Crafty Iyanla.
Rhonda meets with Christie and gives her a bag of clothes to put on. Christie tells Rhonda to wait because she wants to look at them first. Rhonda points you it's not like she gets a choice. Christie just hates it because it is formfitting and shows lots of skin. After her gastric bypass she doesn't like the scars, stretch marks and extra skin.
Asked if she lost all her problems when she lost all the weight, Christie says she always felt judged before her gastric bypass, and thought having the surgery would solve everything. As Christie explains everything she felt before, Rhonda wraps bandages around her that both, show wounds, and also makes her body larger like it used to be. She writes on the bandages things like unfulfilling relationships, angry, blaming her mom and resentment. Christie admits to thinking both her parents were selfish. Her mother for the obvious reason of her drug addiction, and her father because it is rumored that he committed suicide.
As Rhonda keeps wrapping and writing, Christie continues on saying she felt needy, bratty, bitchy, and felt the world owed her something. As Rhonda finishes, Christie says she is now feeling heavy, weighed down and embarrassed again. She wanted to feel beautiful and hoped the surgery would make all those bad feelings go away. They were gone at first, but then returned.
Christie tells Jodi it's going to get hot wrapped up in all these bandages. She explains she used to be 267, then got down to 125, and is now up to 150 again. The two also share first day stories, discussing how hard it was to be so completely honest and feel like they were betraying people. Jodi wants to protect her family, as it's not like they signed up to be on this show.
As Jill and the Lisas return to the house, Lisa1 notices that Christie and her bandages probably have it worse than her and her crutches. After having the exercise explained to her, Lisa1 asks Christie if she didn't feel better after her surgery even though she looked so pretty. She compares it to herself, saying she wanted to marry someone to take care of her, so that she didn't have to work.
Lisa1 then calls Rhonda and has a breakdown over the phone, on Rhonda'a voice mail. She tells her she must be a psychic genius that knows Lisa1 better than she knows herself. Not really, just more honest. Lisa1 has been lying to herself, and just can't do it anymore. She realizes it's time to break up with Mr. Internet once and for all. Lisa1 then moves to computer and cries as she sends that email to Mr. Internet, saying he is never going to give her what she wants.
Because she's on a roll, Lisa1 calls her mother, who tells her she sounds down. Lisa1 explains sh thought she was doing so well, and then explains the crutches. She says she realizes she has been falling back on her and her father. Her mom says she thinks if she had just had that fling before she left with Mr. Internet, he'd be easier to let go of, and is shocked to hear Lisa1 say he was the first thing she let go of. She thinks her mom was hoping Mr. Internet would just take care of her, so that she didn't have to anymore.
Surprising her mom, Lisa1 says she just emailed him and told him that's not what she wants. She doesn't want to be someone's toy. Everyone attempts to help her, but in the long run, it only makes her more dependent and hurts her more. She says she gets it now, and can't go back. Her mother tells her she has been through so much in the Starting Over house, and that if she can fact that, she can face anything. She also says she didn't think Lisa1 would last long in the house, which shocks Lisa1 and shold be a big eye opener.
Jodi and Jill sit down for a chat, and Jill tells her she reminds her so much of herself. Jodi says she doesn't mind the constructive criticism so much, but she's been on her own so long it's hard. Jill says she was so resistant in the beginning, and tells Jodi about when she told her story and Iyanla got in her face and says, "You are a liar!" She says Iyanla ate her for lunch that day.
Lisa1 finds Lisa2 in their shared bedroom, and from her crutches asks Lisa2 to get dressed, get her box with her last picture of Mr. Internet, and throw it out for her. Lisa1 lays down in her bed and cries so hard, it sounds like she might puke again. It's hard for Lisa2 to do this, knowing it is killing her.
As Lisa2 returns to their room, Lisa1 explains she doesn't know how to block someone from her email, so she just changed it so he would go to her junk mail. She then has Lisa make her bed again for her, telling her it's not enough. Iyanla chimes in from a voiceover saying no matter how far she is pushed, Lisa2 just won't give up. Lisa1 lays down to take a nap and undoes her bed again. She says Lisa2 will have to make it again when she gests up. She hates torturing Lisa2 like this. Lisa2 lays in bed, deciding that being codependent is no good for her. I don't think it's good for anyone.
Rhonda checks in on how Christie is doing with her bandages, and she says she has learned no matter what she does, it won't matter unless she and her wounded feelings are healed. They talk about her addiction issues, and she says she turned to food because it was more socially acceptable than drugs or alcohol. Rhonda reminds her that if you don't take care of yourself, gastric bypass can be life threatening. She then tells Christie to wear this until the end of the day, then discuss it with Jill, as she has similar issues.
Kim is having another laundry problem, and talks to Jodi and Lisa1. She is upset again about people putting her clothes in the dryer, as she doesn't put all her things in there. She writes another note and puts it on the dryer. Lisa1 says she doesn't do it anyway. If it looks like towels, sheets, etc., in the washer, she puts them in the dryer. But if it's clothing, she just throws them in the washer. Kim thinks thats a great solution. Here's another. Be more attentive to your things, and when the washer finishes, switch them to the dryer, or hang them up yourself.
Christie gets out a purple card and gives Lisa2 her outfit back. She tells her to dry her hair again, and put the unmatching outfit back on. Christie feels bad for her today, having to take four showers and completely get redressed and ready again and again and again.
Sitting down with Jill, Christie tells her gastric bypass was her last option, but it didn't make a difference. Jill says she always knew her role. She was the fat girl with a pretty face. Christie says she always held in the back of her head that if she lost weight, she would become beautiful and it would all go away. She thought it would be like a lightening bolt. It would all of a sudden make all the old feelings go away. Jill says she now sees herself as a woman with weight to release and baggage. She does not want "fat" to define who she is any longer.
Lisa1 talks to Christie about her email to Mr. Interet. She says it was brief, and she thinks he will look and laugh at it. All he wanted from her was sex and dinner. It made her like a hooker, yet she wasn't getting paid. She was stuck in limbo, not a hooker and not a girlfriend either.
Receiving a response from Mr. Internet, Lisa1 tells Jill she isn't surprised to find she means a whole lot less to him. He tells her to move on. Jill finds the lack of emotional depth and vulnerability really troublesome. She wants to use Iyanla's words when Lisa1 says she has no desire to email him back. "You are a liar!" Jill also says if Lisa1 does it again, she is a masochist. She says if she does go back on it, it could be reason to be kicked out of the house. In typical Jill fashion, she says, "Flight 433 to Miami now boarding."
All the ladies have a chat outside by the fire, toasting marshmallows. They discuss intimacy and vulnerability. Jill say she has learned what it is in here and that she now has three really good friends. She then amends it to 6, 7, 8, then 9. This isn't lost on Kim, that she is the one being obviously left out.
Kim will have a better day tomorrow, though. Her husband, Jeff, and son Jax are coming for a visit. It seems a little early in the process, so Rhonda must be trying to get to the bottom of something. It will be interesting to see if Lisa1 takes the ultimate steps with her awarenesses or if she does revert. She is facing such a tiny doorway. She just needs to take the tiniest of steps to be on that other side.
Do you think Lisa1 will email Mr. Internet again? You can email me at LauraBelle@realityshack.com
Interested in Dancing With the Stars? See article on this week's performance show at LauraBelle's Blog
For a preview of Survivor: Exile Island, see TV Guide Channel Preview
|
|
