It’s time for The Voice, Blind auditions, part 4.  The Blake Shelton, Adam Levine, Cee Lo Green and Christina Aguilera are still building their teams, but as they do, each coach will probably get a bit stingier with their button pushing.

We start out the night with another first name only singer.  This time, he’s name is Ducky. Neither Daffy nor Donald Duck ever had a moustache quite that cool. I can’t help but wonder what the story is behind that name.  I assume that he’s hoping that it’s duck season, and not rabbit season.

Ducky’s a painter as well as a singer. Not a bad one either, from what we’re shown.  We’re also shown Ducky’s girlfriend who doesn’t give a name, but she may be Pebbles Flintstone, grown up. Ducky waddles on stage and launches into Tighten Up.

No one is turning, and Christina seems to be telling Adam to turn, who’s thinking but not hitting his button.  Uh oh, I saw Cee Lo shake his head.

No one turns.

Cee Lo: We’re all definitely looking for the best.

Christina: We all wished we turned around.

Adam: That’s a kickass moustache.

Blake: Is that a throwback to Doc Holiday?

Oh well, it is a kickass moustache, but I guess he’s the lame duck of the night.

We then meet Janathas and his family, including his adorable kids, and hear how he learned to speak English when he came to America as a 5-year-old little boy by singing music.  He takes the stage and performs U Got It Bad.

Christina smiles, and there’s some back-and-forth talk. Adam is nodding and the crowd loves Jonathas.  Cee Lo swings around followed by Christina.

Cee Lo: I thought that was a prank. I thought that was actually us.

Christina: The ladies love Jonathas.

She then talks about molding and packaging. Cee Lo talks about how Christina has packages on her mind and wants a closer look at Jonathas’s watch.

Now we get the competing egos.  Cee Lo says, “I don’t like to brag, but I can do anything.”

I don’t like to brag? Has he watched this show?

Ooh, then Janathas mentions how he always had the hots for Christina, then he picks her.  Is that wise with his wife backstage? Doesn’t seem too smart to me, but she either missed that part or she’s a very forgiving woman.

We’re reminded that there aren’t many spots left as Monique Benabou is introduced to us. She walks in, arm-in-arm with her parents. Her mother is a breast cancer survivor.

The opening notes to Mr. Know It All ring out and everyone is listening intently. Adam has his head down again.  Christina is deep in consideration. Blake looks like he’s on the edge of hitting the button, but recommends Christina take her and she does.  Christina seems happy enough as she turns.

Cee Lo: She should be happy; you did a great job.

Blake: I think Christina is the best female vocalist of our generation. (Um, isn’t Miranda going to have a little issue with that? Has he heard some his wife’s songs? She’s not one I’d want to tick off.)

Glee airs their Winter Finale tonight as New Direction take on The Warblers at Regionals. I’m not even sure how they call things “seasons” anymore, as a show will start, take a month off, come back for a month, take a week off, come back for 3 weeks, take two weeks off, etc. When does a season start and a season end? Catch up with all the TV you may have missed at TV-Links.

1. The View. Jesse Tyler is guest cohost, and Tyler Perry and Abby Lee Miller are today’s guests. 10:00 AM CT ABC

2. That Thing You Do! Tom Hanks not only wrote and directed this film, he costars in it as well. Tom Everett Scott, Steve Zahn, and Liv Tyler star as well. It’s a great movie with a lot of things going for it such as music, romance, drama, comedy, 12:00 PM CT Fox Movie Channel

3. The Talk. Regis Philbin and Elisabeth Shue are today’s guests. 1:00 PM CT CBS

4. The Ellen DeGeneres Show. Taylor Swift and Zac Efron are today’s guests. Syndicated, check local listings.

5. The War of the Roses.. The group from Romancing the Stone hits gold again, this time with Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner playing a warring, divorcing couple, and Danny DeVito a lawyer. 4:10 PM CT Encore Love

6. College Basketball. Illinois at Ohio State. 6:00 PM CT ESPN

7. College Basketball. Kansas State at Missouri. 6:00 PM CT ESPN2

8. NBA Basketball. Sacramento Kings at Miami Heat. 6:30 PM CT NBA TV

9. NCIS. Gibbs doesn’t agree with the PsyOps Division’s doctor when a Navy reservist is suspected of suicide, and DiNozzo eyes McGee’s paycheck. Jamie Lee Curtis guest stars. 7:00 PM CT CBS

10. The Biggest Loser. The drama ratchets up a notch when the winner of a killer temptation challenge wields the power to change up the teams. 7:00 PM CT NBC

11. Last Man Standing. A sibling rivalry is at hand when Mike’s younger brother and dad visit, and Mandy and Kristin help Bud search for a girlfriend. 7:00 PM CT ABC

12. Glee. New Directions and The Warblers compete at Regionals. 7:00 PM CT Fox

13. Switched at Birth. Emmett’s parents argument spoils Regina’s first art show, Daphne can’t decide between two schools, and Kathryn and John’s legal case against the hospital is jeopardized. 7:00 PM CT ABC Family

14. Cougar Town. Julies asks Laurie and Elli to both be her maid-of-honor, in order to not hurt either one, and Chick has a little fun when Grayson asks him for Jules’ hand in marriage. 7:30 PM CT ABC

15. NCIS: Los Angeles. The team tries to show Kensi Blye is innocent when she is accused of murdering a colleague of her father who is also deceased. 8:00 PM CT CBS

16. The River. Continuing the search for Emmet, the group finds a crew member showing a mystical curse’s symptoms, and Lincoln tries to by the more moral person in the group. 8:00 PM CT ABC

17. Ringer. Bridget has a run-in with someone important from her and Siobhan’s past, Malcolm makes a discovery that has hen keeping an eye on Henry, and Catherine would like Andrew to make a huge decision. 8:00 PM CT CW

18. New Girl. Jess ends up as a bully’s new target when she tries to her, Schmidt’s new woman wants to keep everything a secret, and Nick is sent off the edge by a gift from Julia. 8:00 PM CT Fox

19. Jane by Design. The Donovan Decker crew has a difficult time creating the perfect wedding dress for a demanding sociality, and Jane wants Billy and Nick to get better acquainted. 8:00 PM CT ABC Family

20. The Real Housewives of Orange County. Heather hosts a painting party, and Gretchen and Slade learn shocking information about Vicki’s new beau. 8:00 PM CT Bravo

21. Hidden City. Marcus Sakey unveils three of Anchorage’s stories: Robert Christian Hansen, an Anchorage banker who kidnapped prostitutes, flew them into the nearby wilderness, and hunted them like wild game; John Blackjack Sturgus, Anchorage’s first Chief of Police and also its first officer killed in the line of duty whose ghost returns each year to the Anchorage Hotel to finally close his final case; and Eskimo Hunters, in an undercover sting operation, the Department of Wildlife and Gaming arrest a group of Inuit who have been illegally selling the spoils of endangered species to non-natives. 8:00 PM CT Travel Channel

22. Top Gear. A high speed attempt at a NASCAR track has the guys fighting it out, and Rutledge tries to prove how fast the new Mustangs are in a relay race against horses in the desert. 8:00 PM CT Travel Channel

23. Dance Moms. “Bullets at Ballet.” 8:00 PM CT Lifetime

24. Joan and Melissa: Joan Knows Best. When Joan and Melissa learn that Melissa’s friend Conrad has decided to convert to Judaism, Joan decides to throw him a bar mitzvah and quickly gets caught up “Bridezilla-style” in making everything perfect. But things at the Rivers household take a sudden turn when cyber gossip guru, Perez Hilton, calls Melissa with news that the internet is buzzing with rumors about her boyfriend Jason. 8:00 PM CT WE

25. College Basketball. Kentucky at Mississippi State. 8:00 PM CT ESPN

26. Raising Hope. An unusual childhood phobia turns up after Jimmy and Sabrina agreed to be honest with each other, and Burt explains his secret habit to Virginia. 8:30 PM CT Fox

2. Storage Hunters. These hunters look for the best storage units in the country and then go to great lengths to get their hands on what’s stashed inside. Storage Hunters will follow them to the country’s most competitive auctions as they go head-to-head against each other and against local bidders. With so much cash at stake, the competition can quickly go from incredibly intense to completely insane.8:30 PM CT truTV

28. Unforgettable. A murder victim is found in an empty ballpark, baffling Carrie and Al. 9:00 PM CT CBS

29. Parenthood. Julia and Joel head to the hospital to see Zoe’s baby born, Sarah considers a life in New York with Mark, Adam and Crosby entertain an doffer for The Luncheonette, and Jasmine and Crosby take Jabbar camping and deal with their past. 9:00 PM CT NBC

30. Body of Proof. A car accident reveals a dead body in the trunk, and the team then finds yet another dead body. Megan gets together with an old acquaintance, and Kate’s job is threatened. 9:00 PM CT ABC

31. Southland. Sammy tries to make amends after a young man testifies in one of his cases, John and Tang keep an eye on a documentary crew, Lydia is asked to be shift supervisor for a day, but it turns out to be too much for her physically. 9:00 PM CT TNT

32. White Collar. Neal joins a wealthy Yankees fan’s crew, and they are asked to steal memorabilia from Yankee Stadium. 9:00 PM CT USA

33. Justified. Boyd tries to get control of Harlan’s oxy trade, and Raylan tries to stop an all-out war. 9:00 PM CT FX

34. Ink Master. The artists have a lot of big mistakes. 9:00 PM CT Spike

35. Tabatha Takes Over. Tabatha would like a salon owner to encourage her employees to take a stand.. 9:00 PM CT Bravo

36. Top Shot. Teams work through an explosive obstacle course and trench warfare conditions, and two contestants compete in a battle that includes a multi-shot grenade launcher. 9:00 PM CT HISTORY

37. Jersey Couture. The Scalis try to please two divas of charity, and Diane interferes with a client of Chrissy’s. 9:00 PM CT Oxygen

38. Teen Mom 2. Jenelle and Kailyn look back on a year of motherhood. 9:00 PM CT MTV

39. NBA Basketball. San Antonio Spurs at Portland Trail Blazers. 9:30 PM CT NBA TV

40. Conan. Amanda Seyfried and Fun are tonight’s guests. 10:00 PM CT TBS

41. Late Show with David Letterman. Tonight’s guests include Alec Baldwin and Eric Hutchinson. 10:35 PM CBS

Courtney has been “the” woman this season on The Bachelor. Every year there’s one we expect her to leave each week, yet they stay. That woman this year is Courtney. Tonight is the at-home dates, and if she makes it through tonight, I think she’ll be final 2. Catch up with all the TV you may have missed at TV-Links.

1. Live! With Kelly. From Hawaii, Derek Hough is the guest cohost today, and Jon Cryer and Daniel Dae Kim are the guests. Syndicated, check local listings.

2. The Ellen DeGeneres Show. The guests today are Amanda Seyfried, Kym Douglas, and Sophia Grace and Rosie. Syndicated, check local listings.

3. College Basketball. Connecticut at Villanova. 6:00 PM CT ESPN

4. How I Met Your Mother. After Robin breaks up with Kevin, Ted tells her how he feels, and Barney plans to find something personal of Lily and Marshall’s. 7:00 PM CT CBS

5. The Voice. Night four of the auditions. 7:00 PM CT NBC

6. The Bachelor. Ben travels to the homes of the final four to meet their families. 7:00 PM CT ABC

7. Gossip Girl. The Upright Citizen’s Brigade performs excerpts from Dan’s book, Blair tries to save her friendship with Serena, and Ivy and the van der Woodsens end up on a collision course. 7:00 PM CT CW

8. House. A marriage counselor collapses during a speaking engagement, and the team notices behavioral changes, House and Dominka try to convince Immigration they’re a happy couple, and House chooses a team leader. 7:00 PM CT Fox

9. NBA Basketball. Boston Celtics at Dallas Mavericks. 7:00 PM CT TNT

10. Pretty Little Liars. “A” targets a surprising new victim, and Spencer is driven into Wren’s arms by family troubles 7:00 PM CT ABC Family

11. Finding Bigfoot: Birth of a Legend: Further Evidence. Investigators focus on the 1967 Patterson-Gimlin film, and researchers go to sites with footprints of Bigfoot have been reported 7:00 PM CT Animal Planet

12. The Amandas. Jan Moon, owner of Dreamcakes, needs to overhaul her small office. That’s the easy part for Amanda. The challenge is fixing up the bakery’s mobile cupcake truck. Amanda feels alienated from the other moms from Marcelle’s cheerleading squad. When Amanda reaches out and invites some moms for a play date, will she discover they actually have a lot in common or will she decide to embrace the divide and her “working mother” title? 7:00 PM CT Style

13. Basketball Wives. The friendship of Jen and Evelyn is on the rocks, and new women enter the picture. 7:00 PM CT VH1

14. Love Lust. Take a revealing glimpse at the tantalizing story of lingerie. From tightly laced Victorian corsets to Madonna’s missile-like bras, lingerie reflects the feminine ideal of each era and woman’s place in society. And as the zeitgeist of the times changed through world wars and the sexual revolution, so did the silhouette of its undergarments. Silky, skimpy, floor length, or thigh-high, everything you want to know about a culture is hiding seductively underneath … all you have to do is peek. Experts include Maidenform’s Norah Ablerto, Author and owner of La Petite Coquette Rebecca Apsan and Psychologist and author of “The Cult of Celebrity” Cooper Lawrence. 7:00 PM CT Sundance

15. 2 Broke Girls. In order to serve their cupcakes at a bar mitzvah, Max and Carolina pretend that they’re kosher. 7:30 PM CT CBS

16. Two and a Half Men. Zoey and Walden’s relationship suffers an adverse effect after a near-death experience, and Alan believes Lyndsey could have a drinking problem. 8:00 PM CT CBS

17. Hart of Dixie. While the rest of town is superstitious, Zoe is happy to have it snow in Bluebell, Lavon introduces Did and his parents, and George and Lemon come to a big decision. 8:00 PM CT CW

18. Alcatraz. Madsen and Hauser search for a killer with an M.O. of poisoning his victims, believing him to have a background in chemistry. More information comes to light about Madsen’s grandpa.. 8:00 PM CT Fox

19. American Chopper: Senior vs. Junior. Senior deals with the loss of his mom, feeling abandoned, PJD starts a build for One Call Concepts, and OCC shows off a gold bike for Donald Trump. 8:00 PM CT Discovery

20. Hoarders. A woman uses a large legal settlement to finance her hoarding, and a woman refuses to take a bath or take out the trash. 8:00 PM CT A&E

21. Being Human. Josh is in the midst of making dinner when two cops burst into the kitchen yelling at him to put his hands up. Taken by surprise, Josh is handcuffed while the cops tell him that they have found his “stack of dead”. 8:00 PM CT Syfy

22. The Lying Game. After Ethan is arrested for murder, his friends try to prove his innocence. 8:00 PM CT ABC Family

23. Bethenny Ever After. Season premiere. The new season kicks off with a party for the first new cocktail since the sale of Skinnygirl– friends old and new are in attendance, even TODAY show host, Hoda Kotb along with her boyfriend Jay. Bethenny takes life in the public eye in stride but Jason struggles with the constant attention. Parties and press interviews are only a fraction of the new parent’s hectic schedule – managing their second year of marriage, caring for their daughter Bryn and purchasing a new apartment are just some of the challenges ahead. 8:00 PM CT Bravo

24. Bizarre Foods America. Andrew tours Motown. 8:00 PM CT Travel Channel

25. College Basketball. Baylor at Texas. 8:00 PM CT ESPN

26. Mike and Molly. To make up for the fact Mike hasn’t had a birthday party since he was 9 years old, Moll plans a party for him, and Samuel dates a woman he met online. 8:30 PM CT CBS

27. Hawaii Five-0. A man dressed up like a Hawaiian NaKoa warrior is found near the site of a war reenactment dead. 9:00 PM CT CBS

28. Smash. The actor everyone wants to play Jo DiMaggio has a secret, Karen goes to a baby shower in Iowa and has to make a decision about her future, and Eileen’s ex might have potential investors going against her. 9:00 PM CT NBC

29. Castle. Castle and Beckett need to stop a series of events before they start a war. 9:00 PM CT ABC

30. Intervention. A former child actor becomes drug addicted thanks to family pressures and career tension, and a woman addicted to meth and alcohol lives in her parents’ basement rotting away. 9:00 PM CT A&E

31. Khloe & Lamar. Lamar’s insomnia begins to negatively affect Khloé. Malika breaks her biggest dating rule when she starts dating a guy with young children. 9:00 PM CT E!

32. Lost Girl. Bo and Lauren search for a cure for a disease that’s killing Kenzi. 9:00 PM CT Syfy

33. Lizard Lick Towing. With Bobby’s truck up in flames, he’s out for revenge, and it’s up to Ron to hold The Lick together. A huge job lands in the boys’ lap with a chance for an enormous payday: twenty five cars in three hours for a cool thirty grand. 9:00 PM CT truTV

34. It’s a Brad, Brad World. Gary works on the anniversary party, Brad has a trip to New York and a fitting with Shay Mitchell, and Brad and Gary attend The Trevor Project benefit. 9:00 PM CT Bravo

35. Bad Girls Club: Las Vegas. Some of the girls call for a truce with Elease, and Amy cheats on her guy back home. 9:00 PM CT Oxygen

36. Ice Loves Coco. Ice & Coco start looking for a new house but have different ideas of what makes a home. Soulgee is threatened when Coco’s best friend from high school comes to town. 9:30 PM CT E!

37. NBA Basketball. Portland Trailblazers at Los Angeles Lakers. 9:30 PM CT TNT

38. Conan. Kristen Bell, Bret McKenzie, and John Roy are the guests tonight. 10:00 PM CT TBS

39. The Tonight Show with Jay Leno. The guests tonight include Taylor Swift, Michael Clarke Duncan, Robert Randolph, and Cesar and David of Los Lobos and Chris Layton. 10:35 PM CT NBC

The teams make an unusual start to the Race this year. They arrive in Santa Barbara, California, via bicycles, as if on a bike race. I like the change of pace, but it’s hard to really get to see what the racers look like so that we’ll remember them later. The teams are:

Dave and Cherie – Married Clowns. He goes by the adage “what goes around comes around,” and hopes because of their karma they have built up, it will turn around and work in their favor.

Bopper and Mark – Lifelong friends from Kentucky. They explain they’re from the “other side of the tracks.” They’ve never had anything and don’t expect to. If they don’t win, they can’t help their families, so they’re going to to win the money.

Misa and Maiya – Sisters from San Diego. I can tell I’m going to have a hard time keeping them apart until much later in the season. They’re golfers, and while some people think they may be dainty and prissy, for them there will be no crying. As athletes, they know what it takes to win the Race.

Brendon and Rachel – Engaged from L.A. They met on Big Brother and fell in love in the hammock. They proved to be good competitors, and Brendon thinks they showed that by winning Big Brother 13. Rachel disputes this, saying “she” won. They’re not here to make friends; they’re here to win a million dollars. “Nobody comes between me and my million dollars.” I have to hand it to her or the producers, whoever came up with that. That’s good.

Joey “Fitness” and Danny – Best friends from Long Island. They’re all about the hair, the muscles, and the tattoos. People may think they’re the typical Jersey guys, but while Danny doesn’t have a “Situation,” he explains he has a “Solution,” as he raises his shirt. He says there’s a lot more going on over there than they think, and points to his abs. I hate to tell him, but that is what everyone thinks. He would have made us think twice if he pointed to his head.

Nary and Jamie – Federal Agents from L.A. There aren’t a lot of women in their field, and you have to be tougher to do what they do. Nary explains doing this Race “is going to be cake to us.” Jamie likes cake. Oh brother.

Dave and Rachel – Married from Madison. He’s a Major in the Army and has been in the military for sixteen years, being in Iraq for one year. She just realized the magnitude of how much you change when you’re apart. They’re hoping the Race will be the catalyst for reconnecting to reconcile their marriage and friendship and common bond. How can you not like these two?

Elliot and Andrew – Twin brothers from Scottsdale. Elliott is a musician in a rock band, and Andrew a professional soccer player. They’ve always been close and best friends, Elliot explains it by saying they’re like partners, but not gay. Andrew tells him he can’t say that. I’m thinking they belong with Joey and Danny.

Kerri and Stacy – Cousins from Gulfport, Mississippi. They’re the typical Daisy Duke country girls, and explain they do look a little different, but at the end of the day, they’ll be in the mud getting dirty with the rest of the boys. “We’re packing a little punch behind this little drawl.”

Vanessa and Ralph – Dating from San Antonio. They’ve been dating for about a year, but have known each other about fifteen. She used to stalk him, but he got married, and she stalked him some more. He got divorced; she got married. She got divorced, and now they’re dating. They’ll keep the racing to going around the world, and not down the aisle. They seem fun.

Art and J.J. – Border Patrol Agents from Southern California. They’re supervisors of a 40-man unit that controls the coastline. Many times it’s life or death, so they need to be teammates. They’re going to laugh, rib each other, and have fun. Art believes he’s the brains and J.J.’s the braun, as J.J. jokes it’s like thinking you’re the Beauty from Beauty and the Beast.

Done with their bike ride, the teams meet up with Phil on a lush meadow. There will be twelve legs on the race that will push them like never before. The winners of this leg will win the Express Pass that can be used before or during any challenge they don’t want to compete, but it has to be used before the end of the eighth leg.

The first clue is up in the air in miniature hot air balloons. The teams need to run into a corn field and start pulling them down to find the clues. There are only eleven clues in the one-hundred balloons. Finding one with a clue, they can get into a new Ford Taurus and continue racing.

This is the final chance to win a Who Wants to Be a Millionaire giveaway. Reality Shack has been excited to offer you three gift pack giveaways to coincide with Sweeps Month promotions. The celebrities seem to be having a lot of fun, and Millionaire is making sure the fans do too!

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Fashion, Bonding, Sex talk, and African Safari pt. 3. 

Fresh off of their emotional trip to the orphanage, the ladies find themselves in a place of peace and harmony with one another. They come together for breakfast and get along, surprisingly, reflecting on the trip thus far and realizing how blessed they are. And Marlo needs the waiter, please! Raise a toast ‘to giving’. For more culture, Phaedra plans a trip to a local museum for the women. We learn that if a man wants to fetch a woman, she has no say about it. That doesn’t sit too well with the Atlanta wives.

They visit an herbalist, who from here on out will be known as the medicine man. “The woman doesn’t touch his medicine. Only men.” Well, I’d never! He pulls out some “bones” and tells the women about their lives. Honey, Phaedra needs her Prayer cloth.

As for the “readings” from the bones:

-Phaedra politely passes on a reading from the medicine man’s bones.

-Marlo has yet to find the right man. Not that she believes in this mumbo-jumbo crap anyway.

-Cynthia is happy where she is, but as for a happy marriage, that’s up in the air.

-NeNe does not like the relationship she’s in, even though he’s a good man according to the medicine man.

-Kandi will marry the man she lives with—even though she doesn’t live with a guy at present and her last love passed away. Hmm.

-Sheree’s too old and will not marry again because of that. Uh, that’s pretty rude, Medicine Man.

Well, we know where women stand in this culture. Ready to go back to Atlanta, anyone?

Sleepover at Marlo and NeNe’s “old mansion”! Can you believe it? Can you believe all 20-something pairs of high heels Marlo’s decorated the old-fashioned room with? Me either. It’s like a shoe store in their room. Where’s my shopping bag?

Pull out the wine because it’s time for girl talk, or shall I say, sex talk. Marlo even demonstrates a position on Kandi. Hot stuff. It’s just amazing how sex brings everybody together and laughing, getting along. There’s tea-bagging and I’m quite sure no sweet tea is involved whatsoever. It’s a good time, and then Kandi brings up how Marlo flaunts her fashion labels. Light mood. Now killed.

I have to say, it’s so refreshing to see NeNe and Sheree being cordial and civil towards one another again. And leave it to Cynthia to announce it. Well it’s not going to last long now that they’re aware of it. Thanks a lot.

Marlo gives a Jennifer Lewis-like yell and explains how she “loves fashion and bleeds it.” Fashion is her life. We get it.

Something happens between the previous night and the next morning because Marlo wakes up terribly ill. Diarrhea, vomiting, nausea, the works. Germaphobe NeNe decides to stay with her fellow Tall pal. The rest of the women commence on their safari outing. Maybe the Witch Doctor a.k.a. Medicine Man with his special “bones” put a hex on Marlo for not believing in his powers. Suspicious.

While in the jeep, the women miss most of the animals on the safari trail, running their mouths about Kim (where the heck has she been?) and Marlo. Even when absent, Marlo makes an appearance in conversation. Cynthia implies she doesn’t like Marlo’s personality. Which if I’m correct, means you don’t really get along with the person. Since their personality is a big part of that.

As soon as Phaedra, Kandi, Cynthia, and Sheree sit down to a pleasant and quiet lunch, the sound of another jeep catches their attention. I knew it was too quiet. Just too pleasant. And stepping out from the jeep is none other than NeNe, complaining about bugs and whatnot. Now that Marlo’s taken care off at the “old mansion,” NeNe can’t let The Smalls persuade Cynthia over to their side. In the presence of the Tall Boss, Cynthia changes the script and likes Marlo again. Make up your mind, girlfriend.

Since Kandi brings up Marlo—yet again—NeNe informs the Smalls that Kim is their captain.

Speaking of the captain, Kandi, Sheree, and Phaedra report to Kim and update her on the African safari trip. Correction—Sheree dishes to Kim all the details of the trip and throws Kandi under the bus in the process. Basically Kandi didn’t think Kim would come to Africa, let alone the orphanage, and hold black babies. Or at least that’s how Sheree put it. Well Kim is Sheree’s bestie and that’s where her loyalty lies—forget the other Smalls.

Kandi addresses the elephant in the room (i.e. phone convo with Kim), during dinner. This is pure entertainment for NeNe. A divide in the Smalls dealing with boss lady, Kim. Kandi—yet again—decides to come forward and verbalize some issues they’ve all had with Marlo, particularly her flaunting the designer labels. Night ruined. Again. Kandi’s on her own with this one as no one else steps forward to co-sign. Even though they had a mouthful to say about Marlo in less than positive light when she wasn’t around, or agreed with what was said about her. Looks like a dent is forming in some friendships. The Talls and Smalls aren’t as strong as they were before the trip. This was a great episode to have a drinking game to: any time you hear “Marlo”, take a guzlet of your drink, as Andy Cohen would say.

Next episode: The women return to Atlanta and civilization and Kim actually reenters the pictures. More screen time. It appears there’s going to be some friction between Sheree and Kandi as they report to the boss about that phone convo in Africa. Kim isn’t pleased.

Don’t miss a single recap of this show or others. Check out our Facebook page and follow us on Twitter. And before you leave, check out the Who Wants to Be A Millionaire giveaway.

So, the Final Four leave the 110 degree heat of Texas for the frozen tundra of British Columbia. Of course, there were many weeks in between their appearance in both locations – but not that the show addressed that at all. In fact, I am sure that the late episode niceties between the ladies was directly related to the episodes they saw before the finale. If we can assume that this was no different than any other season, the finale tapes after several episodes have already aired. Sarah and Lindsey of the Corn had to have witnessed some of the bad behavior shown towards Beverly – even if it was only the early battles with Heather. Because I am certain that in the real world, the women all got together quite well – and have implied as much on Twitter. They must have known how badly they were coming across. The last scenes between the women were very nice, and I would like to take that as the lasting memory of the Everybody Hates Beverly vibe that was way to prevelant this season.

One thing that we have guaranteed now – a woman will be cooking for the championship this season. Amazingly, that hasn’t happened since Carla took some poor advice (from another female finalist) and lost the Season 5 crown to Hosea. That said, this is still Qui-Gon’s season to lose, and if the first leg of this week’s challenge was any indication, the man can be thrown off of his game.

I have said it before – I am torn on these bizarre challenges. While it is fun to throw some of these crazy tasks at them, and it makes for some really good TV, it is also difficult to gauge who the is the best chef. Just take the second leg as the perfect example – Qui-Gon’s strength was clearly an advantage as he was able to smash the ice blocks and chip away at them at a faster pace than the two women. It is not going out too far on a limb to say that he had a leg up based solely on the concept. These challenges are straight out of The Amazing Race, or even Survivor. I mean, can you imagine a similar challenge on Project Runway? These fabrics have been frozen in ice…

But the funny thing is, as I sit to write this column, it is really hard to say much about it. Other than the niceties that developed between the women – except for Sarah’s rudely placed tree observation in the car – nothing really happened other than, well, the actual challenges. So, here we go…

It’s the Laff-a-Lympics – or at least the Top Chef Olympics. You see, the finale is in Vancouver, or in this case, Whistler, Canada. If you recall, there was a Winter Olympics there in 2010. The four finalists show up in some nice Bravo-approved winterwear. Sarah sporting a new hairdo, and claiming to have learned much about herself and that she needed to be calm and nice. Yep. Oh, and Qui-Gon had a fun, cool hat. They drive up the mountain to meet Padma and Tom – and I half expect to see James Bond ski by as part of a giant chase scene as he tries to protect some European princess and recover lost microfilm.

These are the culinary games – three legs, the winner of each leg earns a berth in the Final Three and thus not required to cook in subsequent legs, and $10,000 cash money. The first challenge was the goofiest, and in my opinion, the best one of the three, as it actually contained aspects of it that related to being a good chef.

It’s a good night for reality TV fans. It’s the season premieres of both The Amazing Race and The Celebrity Apprentice.  Three hours of great TV. I’m not so sure about the new cast of Apprentice, but I always thing that, and they always end up grabbing me with the drama. Catch up on your other favorite shows at TV-Links.

1. NHL Hockey. St. Louis Blues at Chicago Blackhawks. 11:30 AM CT NBC

2. College Basketball. Michigan State at Purdue. 12:00 PM CT CBS

3. NBA Basketball. Dallas Mavericks at New York Knicks. 12:00 PM CT ABC

4. NASCAR Racing. Qualifying for Sprint Cup Daytona 500 from Daytona International Speedway, FL. 12:00 PM CT Fox

5. College Basketball. Syracuse at Rugters. 12:00 PM CT ESPN

6. The Secret Life of Bees. You couldn’t ask for a better cast than Dakota Fanning, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Hudson, and Alicia Keys. A young white girl and her black nanny escape the girl’s abusive home in 1960s South Carolina and are taken in by a family of sisters 1:30 PM CT Lifetime

7. PGA Tour Golf. Final Round of Northern Trust Open from Riviera Country Club in Pacific Palisades, CA. 2:00 PM CT CBS

8. NHL Hockey. Boston Bruins at Minnesota Wild. 2:00 PM CT NBC

9. NBA Basketball. Orlando Magic at Miami Heat. 2:30 PM CT ABC

10. 60 Minutes. Featured tonight are the long-term unemployed, depression treatments, and Magnus Carlsen. 6:00 PM CT CBS

11. America’s Funniest Home Videos. Clips include a toddler reacting to a ringing phone and a sleeping woman with a lobster on her.. 6:00 PM CT ABC

12. College Basketball. South Florida at Pittsburgh. 6:00 PM CT ESPN2

13. The Cleveland Show. Cleveland and rallow are hired to perform a ventriloquist act at a magic show, gaining fame, and Rallow gets tired of Cleveland taking credit for it all. 6:30 PM CT Fox

14. The Amazing Race. Season premiere. The teams travel to Argentina where they must skydive, and one team struggles with anxiety. 7:00 PM CT CBS

15. Once Upon a Time. David decides to be honest with Kathryn about this relationship with Mary Margaret, and Prince Charming searches for Snow White, and agrees to help Abigail with a dangerous mission. 7:00 PM CT ABC

16. The Simpsons. The Simpsons join an off-the-grid community when they get kicked out of Springfield, and their friends react badly when they attempt to sneak back into town. 7:00 PM CT Fox

17. Little People Big World: Battle for the Farm. The future of the Roloff Farm is the subject of a battle as Matt dreams of tripling the size of it, and Amy id close to realizing her dream of creating her own cookbook. 7:00 PM CT TLC

18. Jerseylicious Gayle steps up her marketing plans to corner the market and hosts an “Up Do To Do” party which is a huge hit, and scrambles to find stylists to replace the exiled GiGi and Tracy. Anthony and his new business partner, Cathy Giove, are anxious to be open for business but first must deal with construction and permit delays.  To ingratiate herself in the local salon community, Cathy joins Cricket Professional Beauty Association (CPSA) and sponsors a mixer where she announces her vision for the new salon and her dedication to the beauty industry. 7:00 PM CT Style

19. Mob Wives. After couples therapy, Renee looks at the harsh realities, and Karen starts promoting her book. 7:00 PM CT VH1

20. NBA Basketball. Denver Rockets at Oklahoma City Thunder. 7:00 PM CT ESPN

21. Napoleon Dynamites. Uncle Rice and Napoleon cheat to win the annual bed race, and six-time champion Grandma becomes depressed. 7:30 PM CT Fox

22. The Good Wife. The firm leads a suit against a software company that allowed the Syrian government to somehow make American citizens disappear. 8:00 PM CT CBS

23. The Celebrity Apprentice. Season premiere. Meet the new cast. 8:00 PM CT NBC

24. Desperate Housewives. Susan finds out Julie’s baby daddy, Orson promises to nurse Bree back to health, Roy ends up at Gab’s after Mrs. McCluckey kicks him out, and after being evicted, Porter and Preston try to move back in with Lynette. 8:00 PM CT ABC

25. Family Guy. Peter makes a half-hearted promise to a helpful dolphin, that then moves to Quahog. 8:00 PM CT Fox

26. Oprah’s Next Chapter. Oprah meets with Tony Robbins to discuss overcoming failures. 8:00 PM CT OWN

27. The Real Housewives of Atlanta. The ladies enjoy some African culture and a pajama party together, but Kim and  tattle after Cynthia and Kandi make comments . 8:00 PM CT Bravo

28. Hoarding: Buried Alive. Phyllis takes in complaints from the neighbors about the trash piling up outside, and Faye comes to the realization her hoard is killing her. 8:00 PM CT TLC

29. Snapped. A grade school teacher is accused of using an axe to murder her husband. 8:00 PM CT Oxygen

30. My Fair Wedding with David Tutera. Bride Leigh-Ann’s future mother-in-law planned her wedding. Now, David is giving his bride total control of her big day. She’ll have to choose everything herself – from bridal gowns to tablecloths and flowers. But Leigh-Ann just moved to Los Angeles from Canada, and the wedding is only three weeks away! 8:00 PM CT WE

31. Big Rich Texas. Everyone reconvenes after summer break at the Country Club Fall Cocktail Party. Secrets about Leslie are revealed, and newcomer DeAynni starts to ruffle feathers. Bon stands by her friend’s side even when Whitney returns from Seattle with more dirt on Leslie. But when Pam tells Bon at the Annual Ladies’ Pheasant Hunt that Leslie did the unforgivable, Bon turns on Leslie for good. 8:00 PM CT Style

32. Worst Cooks in America. The aspiring cooks learn how to make hand-pulled Chinese noodles and meatballs. 8:00 PM CT Food Network

33. The Walking Dead. Rick, Hershel and Glenn fight to survive against new foes, both dead and alive.  Shane finds Lori in danger on the road and makes it his mission to bring her back to the farm. 8:00 PM CT AMC

34. Luck. Jerry’s partners try to keep him away from his poker nemesis, Ace gets together with a colleague, and Leon handles weight issues. 8:00 PM CT HBO

35. Shameless. Lip tries to get into Karen’s good graces again, Ian ignores Lip, Frank wants to kick Grammy out, and Fiona gets an invite for a boat trip. 8:00 PM CT Showtime

36. American Dad. A hex turns Stan into an elderly man after he expresses his dislike of old people, and FRancine and Roger head to a dance competition. 8:30 PM CT Fox

37. CSI: Miami. Multiple women are targeted during a Miami sorority murder spree. 9:00 PM CT CBS

38. Pan Am. Wedding plans race forward, with Ted becoming more and more nervous, Kate because suspicious of those around her, Laura gets a surprising offer from Amanda, and Maggie is put in a perilous position. 9:00 PM CT ABC

39. Khloe & Lamar. With Lamar in a funk due to the lockout, Khloé attempts to bring the sexy back to her & Lamar’s relationship.  Lamar & Rob’s relationship begins to suffer when Rob moves out. 9:00 PM CT E!

40. A Bernie Mac Tribute: “I Ain’t Scared of You.” 9:00 PM CT Comedy Central

41. Finding Bigfoot. The team heads to Kentucky’s Daniel Boone National Forest to check on reports of Bigfroot activity. 9:00 PM CT Animal Planet

42. Full Metal Jousting. Two new warriors are bringing the pain, but only one will win. 9:00 PM CT HISTORY

43. Comic Book Men. Kevin Smith comes back to Red Bank and rallies the Stash crew for a game of street hockey.  And hurricane Jason Mewes blows through the Stash, and no one is safe. 9:00 PM CT AMC

44. Eastbound & Down. Kenny restarts his baseball career in Myrtle Beach and reconnects with April. 9:00 PM CT HBO

45. House of Lies. Marty works on being monogamous while on the road, Jeannie takes one for the team, Jeremiah would like April’s discretion, and Monica drops a bombshell. 9:00 PM CT Showtime

46. Ice Loves Coco. Coco thinks she might be pregnant when she experiences scary symptoms. Ice does damage control on the SVU set after a disastrous Jimmy Fallon appearance. 9:30 PM CT E!

47. Life’s Too Short. A faux documentary starring Warwick Davis (“Willow,” the “Harry Potter” and “Star Wars” films) as a fictionalized version of himself: a little person whoʼs down on his luck, desperately trying to hustle and connive his way back into the spotlight.  9:30 PM CT HBO

48. Californication. Richard preempts Hank’s attempts to get back together with Karen. 9:30 PM CT Showtime

The following morning, at the apartment, Kenley and Austin talk about how shocked they are that Rami was sent home.  Jerrell also expresses shock, but then tells us, “Eventually they all have to go so I can get my check.”

The designers then head downtown to meet Angela.  To Austin’s great delight, the gang meet her at a theatre in Broadway.  Angela then introduces everybody to Steven Schwarz, a Broadway composer who has written music for such hits like Wicked.  He wrote the music for Godspell, which is being revived for its 40th anniversary.

Schwartz tells the designers that the prize for this challenge will be their version of a Broadway debut.  The winning designer’s costume will be featured in the performance, and they will be the subject of a write-up in Playbill.  As for the challenge, the designers have to make a costume for a character in Godspell, a rich woman who steals from the poor and flaunts her wealth.  The costume has to be made of separates.  The designers will have a budget of $200.00 and a day to complete the challenge.

The designers begin sketching in the theater.  Austin is delighted to be able to do this, as it lets him soak up the ambience.  Michael draws a skirt and a top.

At Mood, Austin thinks a brocade would be just the thing for the character, while Kara chooses fur for a jacket or stole.  Kenley also chooses a brocade, while Jerrell opts for some lamé.

Back at the workshop, the designers get busy.  Kara starts work on a dress.  Mila explains the Godspell character again.  Several other people will do the same thing during the course of the show, and it’s annoying.  The concept isn’t that complicated:  design a costume for a rich, ostentatious thief.

Joanna comes in to check on people and she starts with Austin.  He explains the character, and adds that he imagines her as being like Marie Antoinette.  Joanna likes the idea, but tells  him that he needs to make “hideous into fabulous,” as his look, so far, is hideous.

Kara is doing a maxi-skirt, and Joanna tells her that her look isn’t ambitious enough.  Kara, who is in her 30′s, gets upset, cries, and protests that she’s doing her best.

Mila is making a gold and white striped shirt and pairing it with a green and yellow striped skirt.  She’s debating with herself about whether to make a pencil skirt, and Joanna suggests she make a pencil skirt as those look “powerful.”  I do know the pencil skirt is a popular style for business attire.

Mondo is working on a coat that he says is the character’s father’s old smoking jacket.  He plans to put her in clothing that has sentimental value.  Each piece will come from some place important to her.

Jerrell tells Joanna that he loves texture.  He is making a jacket that he views as a “statement piece” and a “piece of jewelry.”  Speaking of jewelry, he plans to use a lot of it for his look.

Kenley cheerfully tells Joanna that she isn’t using polka dots this time.  She’s making a jacket and plans to use feathers for glamour.  She describes her look as “signature thrift store pieces.”

After Joanna leaves, Michael and Mondo try to comfort the still-distraught Kara.  The models then come in for their fitting.  Austin is pleased with how his look is shaping up, but Mondo thinks his outfit looks heavy and overwrought.  He’s also still upset about his loss at the last challenge, and Kara tries to comfort him.  On that note, it’s time for everybody to go home.

The following morning is the day of the runway show, so the designers get back to work.  Mila has finished her skirt and top, and is now working on a jacket made of white fur.  Austin get annoyed when he finds somebody using “his” sewing machine– which is silly, since there are probably plenty of sewing machines available, now that roughly half of the designers are gone.

The models come in to get ready for the show.  During this, Michael finds the shoes he’s picked out won’t stay on his model’s feet, so he quickly conjures up some straps to hold them in place.  Mila has gotten a lot of gold accessories for her outfit.

On the runway, Angela introduces this week’s guest judge:  Sutton Foster, a Broadway actress.  Then it’s time for the show.

On this week’s episode of Face Off, there are nine artists who remain – Beki, Sue, Rayce, R.J., Heather, Jerry, Tara, Ian and Matt. They are getting down to the wire and must take the game to the next level and step it up; the sky is the limit.

The contestants are greeted in the early morning hours, and this leads RJ to have fears of another artist being cut, as McKenzie walks in to present a new foundation challenge. Let’s face it; this is a “tough business with crazy hours.” McKenzie introduces beautiful runway models in a challenge based on Hollywood’s magic and penchant for turning beautiful creatures into “plain Jane’s.”

McKenzie reviews the challenges and uses the following beauties as inspiration – singer Mariah Carey, who was completely transformed in the hit film Precious; statuesque Charlize Theron, who portrayed serial killer Aileen Wuornos in Monster; Nicole Kidman in The Hours; and Cameron Diaz in Being John Malkovich. These infamous beauties were asked to tone down to portray these characters, and that is exactly what McKenzie expects the contestants to do with these super-perfect supermodels.

The contestants must give the models make-unders. There is nothing worse than being forced to sport a uni-brow, but let’s see how this turns out. There is a guest judge who will assist in judging the contestants in their make-under, the infamous woman who geek-ified Drew Barrymore in Never Been Kissed, Kim Green. The models have been randomly selected for the contestants, and they have two hours to make them look like crap.

Matt begins working and brings in acne scarring, Sue gives her model an old age and overly tanned look, Ian chooses to turn his model into a prostitute with bruises and all, RJ turns to the 80’s for inspiration with lots of heavy make-up and way too much eye shadow, and Jerry goes with a drug addict prostitute with a tattoo that says Trust Me and adds cracked lips for a full effect. Heather’s character looks like a warped mix of Shirley Temple and Baby Jane, Tara’s model doesn’t look completely unfortunate, but has more of a plain dowdy look, Beki’s model looks almost orange and sports super pink lipstick with a strange hairstyle, and Rayce turns his model into an unkept sick librarian.

The contestants work hard and definitely take McKenzie’s advice and inspiration she provided them. The models are completely unrecognizable. Kim loves Jerry’s details. Rayce and Ian also did “really bad make-up in a really good way.”

The winner of the foundation challenge is Rayce; he finally won and is happy to have immunity. The contestants head back to the house and proclaim it is vegengce time and things are about to get crazy.

The next morning the contestants arrive at the lab where McKeenzie introduces the spotlight challenge, “old age.” The contestants are divided into teams of three – Beki, RJ and Heather; Tara, Sue and Matt; and Jerry, Ian and Rayce. They are introduced to their models; and shocks and gasp are left out by the contestants, but of course a commercial runs its course to leave some suspense. The contestants must work together and try to get along. Jerry proclaims he is happy with his team; the others want to avoid Sue and her “drama.”

There is a catch to this challenge, a surprise. The contestants will be working on twins and must age one to the age of 100 and one to the age of 75. Beki thinks it’s cool. There is also a very special guest judge who worked on Brad Pitt in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Greg Cannom. He offers some aging advice, and the contestants instantly get to work. Tara is a little upset because Sue tries to take charge, but if they would work together they would get things done better.

But wait … McKenzie walks back in and has another surprise, the twins are triplets (are they cloning people on Syfy?). The catch is they must age the last sibling to the age of fifty.

Matt agrees with Sue and finds Tara to be a bit bitchy. This seems to be the most stressful and dramatic episode of Face Off, as the contestants realize what is at stake and just how badly they each want it.

On day two of the Old Age challenge, the contestants have ten hours to sculpt and work on the make-up until application day. Heather, Beki and RJ seem to be working well together. McKenzie returns with a very serious-looking Glenn and Greg. Glenn jumps right in with questions, followed by Greg’s questions. Sue is upset because Tara tells Glenn, Greg and McKenzie that they are the “least experienced of the group.” This causes Sue to get slightly ballistic in her own very calm way.