Dale and Kelly Wentworth – Father and daughter from Washington State.
Dale is 55 years old and owns a farm in rural Washington. Having driven through Washington this summer – I’ll tell you – that’s most of the state. He’s a self-made man of the land who hates it when people don’t return phone calls. Doesn’t that sound like an odd pet peeve for a farmer? It awfully urban of him. I would expect it would be something like when his feed delivery is two days late and he had to feed the chickens Pirates Booty for breakfast. His Survivor inspiration is Big Tom – which means most of you will love him, I will not, and no one will understand a damn thing he says. In his CBS bio he says some very sweet things about playing this game with his daughter which makes me really want to like him, and very fearful of what will happen if he has to duel with her.
Chances of likability – On a scale from 1-10? About an 8.
Chances of winning – Maybe a four. Doesn’t sound like anyone would want to be sitting in front of a jury against him. See Big Tom for backup on that one.
Kelly left the farm and now lives in Seattle. So, she’s used to rain. She is now a marketing manager from one of the companies from The Indexer, which is about 200X less likable than self-made farmer. She talks about enjoying kicking people’s butts at board games – so she will be one of those “intense” players. Intense players are usually kind ways of describing pain in the ass players. She sees Parvati (of course) as her Survivor model – and let’s be honest here, Parvati would not even blink before screwing over Big Tom.
Chances if likablilty – 3. Not everyone can pull off the Parvati mixture of scheming and charm.
Chances of winning – 6. Remember, Parvati won.
Drew and Alec Christy – Brothers from Central Florida. So, let’s just assume they are crazy. Because, you know, Florida.
Drew – He’s the older brother (25) who is a “traveling Sales Representative in the family business.” Their bios never say what the family business is – so I am going to go with gun dealers. Because, you know, Florida. He says he is spontaneous and a goofball, so guess which Survivor he thinks he is? Yep, Fabio. Self-proclaimed Survivor goofballs are contractually obligated to compare themselves to Fabio. They are also now obligated to aspire to be Malcolm, but thankfully, Drew doesn’t…oh wait, of course he did. He drops another, more egregious, “m” word in his bio that cheeses me off. Manipulator. Inevitably, most people who think they are manipulative are usually manipulated. Or come across as jerks.
Chances of likability – 6. Fabio and Malcolm were. But he gets minus 2 points for Florida and the “m” word.
Chances of winning – 7. Well, Fabio won.
Alec is still a student at Florida Gulf Coast University and is proud that he is much better at college than he was at high school. His pet peeve is basically the strategy we all use on our children to eat – people who don’t like something until they tried it. I like his random choice of three things to be stuck on a desert island with – his watch, a lacrosse stick and Playboy magazine. Snerk.
Chances of likability – 8. I already like him better than his brother.
Chances of winning – 2. I can see him getting booted early as a threat.
Jeremy and Val Collins – Married cop and firefighter from Foxboro, MA. He instantly games two points for his name, and loses two from being from where the Patriots play.
Jeremy is the firefighter and is a former indoor football league player. He played for the New England Surge in the Continental Indoor Football League. Until this Google search – I had no idea this league existed. He listed fantasy football as one of his hobbies – so I like him already. He should go on “The League.” He has always liked JT, but calls Tyson 3.0 as the Survivor he would most be like. And I like that he was able to identify that Tyson played three times and was only good that last time. He lists not having to eat much as one of his qualifications to win. Good. Because he won’t be.
Chances of likability – 9. Can’t blame a guy for where he lives.
Chances of winning – 8. He doesn’t have to eat!
Val is a cop who lists “liars” as her biggest pet peeve. And I hope she uses that to her advantage when interrogating a perp. Like how I used my years of TV cop show viewing there? She and her husband lost a point for using unnecessary “y”s in their kids’ names. And since I already wrote his section, she will take the point hits. That’s what married couples do for each other. I do like her answer for what she would want on a desert island – “A lokai bracelet with mud from the Dead Sea to remind me to be hopeful at my lowest point and water from Mt. Everest to remind me to stay hopeful at my highest point.” Wow. Smarter than the average Survivor.
Chances of likability – 5. The two points come off here. Stupid Y.
Chances of winning – 6. I see jury as most likely. But possible.