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Survivor Cagayan Premiere – Eps 1 and 2 – If They Only Had A Brain

Now they’ll be fine, right? Oh wait, Garrett isn’t having any fun. Poor Garrett didn’t want to “survive” against the elements on “Survivor.” He didn’t want to starve. And in related news, Garrett thought he was going on “Chopped.”

At least they banded together in the next challenge and took a commanding physical lead over the other two tribes and only had a puzzle to contend with. Piece. Of. Cake. Go to town on it Vulcan Science Officer. Go ahead. Any day now. Ok, Brawn has caught up, but you are still a genius, you can do this. Ok, so the cop just finished the puzzle in about eight seconds. At least the Beauty tribe is still in the water. Go on. No rush. Well, a little rush, they are on shore. Ok, so the cop caught you, but surely the horse trainer won’t. And you lost again. Wow.

There is no doubt that the Vulcan is doomed now. All they have to do is go about their business until tribal. Easy friggin’ vote. Aaaaaaand that’s not what goes down. Garrett the Genius has chosen to have an open forum about how she’s toast. And doesn’t want to allow for any side conversations. Tasha, the last ally for the Vulcan, calls foul on that and reminds them all that they are actually on Survivor. She and Kass eventually escape to the beach to briefly chat when the Genius and Spencer come calling while munching on a giant pile of fruit. Enjoy that fruit, boys.

Back at camp, we see the Vulcan eyeballing a bag in the shelter. Instantly I got excited as I thought she was going to search the Genius’ bag and find the Hidden Immunity Idol and use it against him. But no, she’s not going to do that. She is possessed by the spirit of Brandon Hantz and dumps the entire food supply, minus the aforementioned fruit, right on the fire. Boom! Nothing can save her now.

Except the Genius imploding at Tribal Council! He outed his alliance, he talked in circles, he made no sense at all. And got voted out on the spot as the ladies teamed up to take him out. While I worry for Spencer, who seems to have some game, I think it more likely that he takes the Vulcan’s place in the voting bloc when they return next week (I can only assume).

Bad. Tribe.

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