Roadblock – Join with the Royal Regiment of Scotland and play a harmonizing note while marching around the room in Gosford House. The trick is to figure out how to keep your breath at a steady pace and to maintain steady pressure on the pipes all the way around. Essentially, all four of the five Roadblockers do just fine after some initial trepidation over the imposing instrument. Bates reveals the family’s Scottish background, so he’s got that going for him. Not surprising – when you think hockey, you think Scotland.
Only Caroline struggles to finish the task – it takes her seven tries. This is a bit odd considering she’s a singer and theoretically has some strong lung capacity. All her struggles really do is put the team squarely in third place. At least she has found a husband – and old man named Jim, who’s pushing 70, shows her some kindness and encourages her to finish.
Roadblockers include – Bates, Max, Caroline, Mona and Meghan.
Detour – Hey, you know what? It’s a choice between two tasks each with its own pros and cons. Doncha know? In this Detour – the teams choose between Tasty Pudding and Whiskey Rolling. For pudding, they are making haggis. Ox intestine. Internal organs. Seasoning and oats. Yummy. For the rolling, they have to roll eight large barrels of whiskey up a stone alleyway to a festival.
The barrels are not difficult, just grueling. I thought Slap Shot could face a penalty because they used their brute strength to carry the barrels rather than roll. No penalty. YouTube was unable to properly roll the barrels like the others – where each rolls their own – they have to team up to roll them one at a time. They were behind the moms anyway, but this certainly hindered their chances of catching up.
The haggis was also not tough – just took some time. The hard part of it was the random Ren Faire type of actor pretending to be 18th Century poet Robert Burns rattling on with a poem about haggis. That’s right. Living in the 1700s in Scotland was so boring they had to write poems about haggis. The Moms had some advantage here solely because they have lots of cooking experience.
Slap Shot does the barrels, while the Newlyweds and Underwood do the haggis. The Moms and YouTube get U-Turned, so they have to do both.
Speed Bump – The Moms had to bowl. At least, they had to play a version of Scottish bowling called skittles. The balls don’t have holes. They had to pitch a flora (I think) – or as we know it…a strike. It takes them 16 tries – compounded by the fact that after each attempt they had to restack the pins.
• Gosford House? Is that where Gosford Park takes place? And good job by the show in pandering to the Downtown Abbey crossover fans.
• Why is there a team every season who thinks that people who don’t think like them are “sheep?”
• I was about to slam Underwood for failing to learn how to drive stick before the Race – but it wasn’t that bad. They couldn’t drive the car because it was stuck in parking brake mode. So, not bad planning, just not paying close attention.
• Bates talks about his underwear juuuust a bit too much, I think. Of course, a great reveal at the end would be to see him wearing Aquaman Underroos.
• Now is the part of the episode where I am a 14 year old boy. Because, really, the Show was just handing me the lines left and right. Max – “blowing till you’re blue in the face.” Jen – “She’s a singer, she knows how to blow.” Caroline – “My mouth is starting to hurt…my lips are so dry I can’t keep them wrapped around this thing…My mouth is not working anymore.” Jen – “She’s blowing too hard.” Seriously. How do they expect me to resist that?
• Wait – something about Meghan. She played trumpet for four years. Yay – character development. Oh, and she made out with the bagpipe teacher – in as much as making out equals sharing a mouthpiece.
• Underwood – “We don’t have the mental strength to do the barrels.” Mental? It’s rolling barrels. You could probably train a goat to do that.
• Does Joey really not know what haggis is? I mean, I understand never having a chance to sample it, but hasn’t he even seen a movie where it is referenced?
• Beth gets the recap title – “I smell like haggis and sweat.”
Order of Finish – Newlyweds (10 grand each), Slap Shot, Underwood, Derby Moms, YouTube (ELIMINATED)
Next Week – Two hour finale. A final elimination and then the Finish Line – at what appears to me from the clip to be at Mount Vernon estate in Virginia.