“Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Beautiful” – The Apprentice 3, Episode 7
By: Cori Linder
Beauty is like a red rose—it looks and smells sweet but get too close to it, and it might stab you with a thorn.
Audrey and the rest of the Net Worth team return to the suite, and Audrey feels wounded because her team members thought she was the weakest link and that she represented incompetence. For her, they insulted her personally, which makes her sick to her stomach. Apparently she doesn’t endorse Mr. Trump’s mantra that “It’s not personal, it’s just business.”
Audrey lashes out at her team, saying that she doesn’t want to be treated as a child. She believes she has earned her right to be there based on, again, personal issues such as her parents went to prison, she was living out of a car at 17, and had nothing to her name. Girls hated her because she is so beautiful, and she wanted to scar her face so that they would like her.
In comes John who adds fuel to the fire—with a smile. He tells her that she will probably make more money than anybody else because she’s “gorgeous and a sweetheart.” Say that to me, John, and I’ll give you the biggest smile. Audrey juts out her lower lip, says he insulted her, curses, and then walks away. John seems to be loving this.
Each team will be building a miniature golf course on the Chelsea Piers and then will run it for a full day. The team who makes the most money will win. Supervising the tasks will be Carolyn and Ashley Cooper (substituting for George).
Assigning project managers:
Net Worth – Audrey knows she needs to prove herself or her team will feed her to the lions, so she volunteers to be project manager. She feels this is ideal because she has played miniature golf and has creative ideas about it. Her logic is, well, interesting. John doesn’t agree and believes that the person with the least personal issues should be project manager. His bluntness is actually refreshing and it is so obvious he cares nothing about her. She fights for the job and “wins.” Immediately, she delegates jobs.
Magna – There’s less drama on this team, and Stephanie will be project manager.
The Magna team comes up with a jungle theme and calls it “Safari Sunday” to attract parents and children. While the team seems focused on aesthetics, Kendra is worried about the marketing aspect and suggests they work with vendors to do cross-promotion marketing and provide discounts.
On the Net Worth team, the girls have fun picking out costumes and clown outfits while the men are wanting Audrey to actually “lead” and make some decisions regarding marketing. This seems to be too difficult for Audrey. Later, Audrey requests status reports from everybody but an argument between John and Audrey ensues. “Stop it, stop it!” implores Audrey. It’s like big brother is picking on little sister. In her mind, Audrey is probably thinking he’s just bitter because she’s “pretty.”
Soon the Net Worth team members dress up in clown suits to attract attention. Now, for many of us, clowns represent the ultimate colorful freaks that terrorized our childhood birthday parties. And just when we think we have moved past this trauma, we see a clown (masquerading as Chris) chewing tobacco and loudly smacking his lip. In my youth, this would have put me over the edge. Now, I just have to cringe hearing that slop, slop, slop in his mouth. “The kids are all afraid of me,” he discovers. Slop, slop, slop.
The Magna team is progressing nicely with their fliers/coupons, and is enjoying much success, which is why they don’t enjoy much air time.
Magna outsells Net Worth by $200. In keeping with the golf theme, Magna gets to play golf with Mr. Trump and professional golfer, Christy Kerr. The Net Worth team must face the boardroom.
On the golf course, Mr. Trump arrives in a helicopter, an entrance that Erin thinks is “pretty hot.” Erin tries her best at golf but her skills are left to be desired. Mr. Trump politely comments she has a “very delicate swing.”
Back in the suite, Audrey seeks advice from Angie who warns that John is going to eat her alive. John suspects that Audrey will bring in Angie to gang up on him.
In the boardroom…
Audrey blames the team’s promotion strategies for their loss. Mr. Trump seems more concerned with Chris’s habit of chewing tobacco. Back to Audrey…she is tired of having the project manager be in charge of everything and that it’s all John’s fault. John goes on the offensive and “insults” her by saying she’s a 22-year-old girl, which doesn’t bode well with Ashley Cooper. She counters with, “Mr. Trump, he thinks that I’ll only be successful because I’m beautiful and have a good personality.” Are we missing something here? Gone is her pout in favor of a radiant smile for The Donald. Everybody wants to fire Audrey, except her #1 fan, Angie.
In an odd move, Audrey decides to bring John, Craig, and Angie back into the boardroom. Angie looks upset for she has been defending Audrey all along. Now, in Angie’s mind, she might have brought Angie back in so that they could gang up on John. However, it’s apparent that Angie is no longer blinded by Audrey’s “beauty” and sees her as the beast instead. Now, Angie believes that Audrey should be fired.
Mr. Trump says although her team members thought Audrey was good-looking, they didn’t respect her and beauty doesn’t cut it. “At least they can’t say I picked the best-looking one,” remarks Mr. Trump.
In the Cab of Shame…
In the taxi, Audrey—her eyes drooping—says she’s sad that John is still there. And then, with a beaming smile, says “Mr. Trump did say I was beautiful.” For Audrey, all is forgiven.
Until next time…
Quotes of the week:
“When I get to the pier, we’re going to have a little pow-wow…[hangs up the phone and then under her breath]…to sit you down like a child and beat the s*** out of you.” – Audrey (when discussing with John the marketing strategy)
“Audrey made one big decision and that was that she was not going to make any decisions.” – John
“It’s really funny. She’s trying to go toe to toe with me, like the clash of the Titans, but in reality it’s like a lion swatting away a gnat.” – John (commenting about Audrey)