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The Surreal Life: Season 4, Episode 1: That's the way they all became the Surrealbrity Bunch

By Tweetwara

So another group of celebs have come together in a house for another season of the Surreal Life. If you think that Flava Flav and Brigitte made last season crazy, think again! Even MORE craziness is in store for this season. This time, just like the first season, there are SEVEN celebs in the house to add to the mayhem.

First, a cab driven by Kathy Griffin picks up Joanie Laurer, aka the WWF’s Chyna. She talks about how she has had some tough breaks after being fired from wrestling. She walks in the house and finds a room that has one twin bed, stating that she does not want to share a room. The room has a bar and a bathroom and she claims she is going to rule the house as she walks around in a bikini with her nipples partially showing.

Next Griffin drops off Christopher Knight who we all know as Peter Brady from the Brady Brunch. He says he wants to come in the house and show people the type of person he is outside of the Peter Brady label. He finds Joanie and they walk around the house. Chris points out to Joanie that the people on the wall are the other housemates. A dumbfounded Joanie wonders how Chris knew this. (She obviously has never watched the show, nor did she notice her own picture on the wall). She tells Chris that she guesses someone from the Partridge Family or Brady Bunch is going to be in the house. Chris says, “That’s me!”.

Next the first female rapper to go platinum, “Da Brat” (whose real name is Shawntae) walks in. She seems a little full of herself and says she won’t stay in the house if there are old people or “has beens”. When she walks by the wall and sees “Peter Brady” she calls her agent and says she wants to leave. She introduces herself to them, but still claims she wants to leave, especially after seeing Chyna walk around doing her exercises with her thigh master that look “sexual” to Da Brat.

Soon Jane Wiedlin arrives. She was part of the all female band, the Go-Gos until she left to start a solo career (that did not last long). Jane comes across as a pixie to the rest of the cast.

Chris tells Chyna he thinks her bedroom was intended for Verne because everything is especially low (the bed, dressers, bar, chairs, and closets). Chyna refuses to believe that and says that the room seems “girly”.

Season One Next Top Model winner Adrianne Curry is next to arrive. In the same cab is Marcus Schelenberg who is a break out Calvin Klein model. Adrianne is excited to be living with him and the other housemates who are people she grew up with. Marcus thinks Da Brat is rude because she doesn’t walk over and introduce herself to him. Da Brat got her name because people thought she was spoiled. And…. she IS.

The housemates pick out rooms. Da Brat feels like she is living with the Brady Bunch. There are 2 rooms, each with 3 water beds and the single room that Chyna has already chosen. It seems that the girls are going to share one room and the guys the other.

Last to arrive is Verne Troyer. He is the 2’8″ “Mini-Me” from Austin Powers. He says he is not a big fan of reality TV shows and hopes that everyone leaves him alone. He looks for his room. He is mad when he realizes that Joanie has taken it. Joanie refuses to give up the room. The others tell her that they think the beds and closets are to high for him. Verne says he will leave if he doesn’t get the room. Finally, Joanie says she’ll give Verne the room. Verne seemed to care more about privacy than things being low. Peace is restored and the rooms are set. Verne has his own room, Da Brat, Joanie, and Jane share one room and Marcus, Adrianne, and Chris share the other.

A paper comes and says that dinner is on Adrianne. Not that Adrianne was actually paying or cooking … The cast walks in the dining room and the food is ON Adrianne, LITERALLY. The cast seems to enjoy eating the sushi off of her, especially Verne. He comments the whole time about her body, even rubbing her tea leaf covered nipple.

Later, Adrianne and Jane decide to skinny dip. Chris and Marcus watch. A drunk Verne wakes up and tells Adrianne if she shows her butt, he will show his. They do. Verne gets really drunk and passes out. Chris carries him to his room. Verne starts to make this weird moaning noise.

Da Brat can’t sleep because of Joanie’s snoring. She goes to sleep on the couch and sees Verne drive by on his scooter naked. He goes in the corner and starts peeing! Brat tells him that he isn’t in the bathroom, but he says, “Yes it is”. She gets Chris who has already been given the title of “Father of the house”. Chris tries to talk to Verne (and keep a straight face). Brat says she feels like she is in the “Twilight Zone”.

So there you have it. Another season of craziness and the unexpected has begun. Stay tuned to see what other mayhem occurs in the Surreal Life house!

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