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Freelance entertainment writer, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.

The Amazing Race, April 15 – Kookoocachoo the Baboons

The racers should all know the U-Turn is coming. It’s directly following a non-elimination leg, and there are only six teams left. And with all the crap that was flying between them all after last week, who knows how this is going to turn out. The Teachers/Federal Agents aren’t out of it yet. Everyone could gang up on others in the Double U-Turn, which would allow the Federal Agents to catch up. There aren’t many there who like Big Brother team Rachel and Brendon, so I don’t know how they’re going to escape the Double U-Turn, unless they get there first.

The first team to leave the pit stop in Kilimanjaro, Tanzania, are once again Blonde Rachel and Dave at 6:03 AM. They get a clue telling them to drive on a safari back into the Ngorongoro Crater, then travel to Safari Junction, where they need to search for “Hillary Clin Ton.” At Safari Junction? Really? Sure enough, Dave is expecting the Double U-Turn, so wants to arrive first before Border Patrol, and they are considering U-Turning the Green Team (Big Brother).

Kentucky team Bopper and Mark are the next to leave just two minutes later at 6:05 AM. Bopper injured his knee on the last leg, but before he lets it stop him, he’ll let them cut it off, and he’ll “keep on truckin’.” He believes they entered the Race as huge underdogs, while Mark adds that he doesn’t think they’re underdogs anymore. They’ve moved up to where everyone is recognizing them as a threat. That might not be so good on a leg with a Double U-Turn.

Border Patrol agents Art and J.J. are the next to leave at 6:23 AM. Way back in Bavaria, Germany, they created an alliance with Blonde Rachel and Dave, and all agreed they would U-Turn the Green Team. With their ears probably ringing, Big Brother leaves at 6:48, and Rachel says the more the haters hate, the stronger she and Brendon get. She wants to just “let them drink their Haterade,” and she and Brendon will be the ones who benefit from it. He oddly comments, “Feed me, Seymour.” Vanessa and Ralph leave at 7:18 AM.

Driving through the Crater, Dave comments that it’s referred to as “Africa’s Garden of Eden.” It’s very tranquil, and he finds the mystique phenomenal. Watching the sunrise, Bopper tells Mark he’s glad to be doing the Race with him, and the feeling is mutual. Redhead Rachel would like to forget about the Race and just stay there. I’m sure that would make the five other teams very happy. Dave thinks he’s looking at Mrs. Robinson instead of group of baboons as he calls out, “Kookoocachoo.” He finds this the most surreal experience of his life, as it’s exceeding all his expectations.

Bopper is amazed to see “stuff that we ain’t never going to see in Kentucky.” The don’t even know what some of the animals are. He knows his daughter would freak out to see it. Art is just as amazed and thinks if they win the million dollars, they can always fly back there. Redhead Rachel calls this “so much cooler than a zoo.” It’s made them forget that they were racing, and one of the best parts is that the people they don’t like are nowhere to be found. Brendon sees it as a “pause in the game.” Vanessa wanted to go on a safari in Africa and see an elephant, and here she is.

Blonde Rachel and Dave and Kentucky reach Safari Junction at the same time and start asking around for “Hillary Clin Ton.” Meanwhile, a box baring the name Barack Obama is visible. So what’s the deal with U.S. politics? They both get pointed in the direction of a small little cart outside baring the name “Hillary Clin Ton Shop.”

The two teams find a Detour – Water Supply or Air Supply. In Water Supply, teams will pick up a cartful of empty containers at a specific address and make their way to the well. They’ll wait their turn, fill the containers, and bring them back. In Air Supply, teams will work with a local mechanic to fix a tire puncture. First, they need to remove the inner tire without removing the wheel from the bike, find the leak, patch it up, fill it, and take it for a test run. Both teams decide to do Air Supply; let’s just hope they don’t break out in cheesy ’80s songs.

Border Patrol are approaching Safari Junction and looking for Hillary Clin Ton. Art says she’s kind of old now, but he doesn’t know what she looks like here. J.J. suggests that she’s probably wearing a pantsuit. They see the shop, find the Detour, and decide to do Water Supply. The other two teams begin the fix-a-flat challenge. Dave is used to removing a tire from the bike to fix the flat, but realizes their practice here is to leave it connected. Mark works on the tire saying when he was growing up, they didn’t have new bikes. Rachel and Dave find the hole, telling the local mechanic he’s a good teacher. He winks at the camera.

Border Patrol picks up their canisters and transport them to the water hole, only to see a huge line of people waiting. Art realizes it takes thirty to thirty-five seconds or so to fill a bucket, then counts about sixty buckets in line, so knows it’ll be about thirty to forty minutes until they get to the front of the line. It gives them an appreciation of what people must do just to get water. J.J. suggests they not move, as it’ll take twenty to thirty minutes just to find the Air Supply challenge.

Brendon and Rachel stop for directions and are told Hillary Clin Ton is inside the petrol station, but then see Barack Obama and Hillary Clin Ton on the side of the road. They decide to do Air Supply. Vanessa and Ralph arrive and ask around for Hillary Clin Ton. They can’t find anyone that knows anything about this. As they pass right bight the tiny shop, she figures it’s probably something obvious that they’re missing.

Rachel and Dave are fixing their flat still, as are Kentucky. Bopper points out he has mechanic hands and compares this to a NASCAR pit stop. Rachel and Dave’s tire isn’t fixed, which produces arguing from them yet again. He blames, and she strikes back, just like always. Meanwhile, Kentucky is asking to have their tire looked at and approved. Border Patrol is still waiting in line figuring now there are about a hundred buckets before them, surprising, as I thought it was sixty before.

Kentucky get passed and receive a clue to make their way on foot to Jack Stelzer Pub where there is a Double U-Turn ahead. Mark tries to ask for directions and has a local just nodding as him. Language barrier apparently. Finally someone tells him it’s about three kilometers ahead. Blonde Rachel and Dave are still fixing and arguing as she offers to just sit back and let him do it. They finish and get their tired passed and receive the next clue, as Big Brother arrive. She’s worrying about them being U-turned after seeing Rachel and Dave leave, and Brendon tells her they just need to make it through that and focus.

Federal Agents Nary and Jamie are finally leaving at 9:21 AM. It’s a bummer to them to leave in last place, but they say they’re just here to have a great time, try to win a million dollars, and see the world. The only thing they can do is just fight for it, and they’re willing to do it, so “Speed Bump, here we come.”

Kentucky land at the pub and find the Double U-Turn. Not surprisingly, they decide to not U-Turn anyone. They receive a clue telling them to head to Gem Gallery & Arts. Rachel and Dave land at the pub and call it awesome when Kentucky tells them they didn’t U-Turn anyone. Rachel and Dave discuss their agreement to U-Turn the Green Team if it ever comes to that, but Dave feels success has been achieved either way without creating an unnecessary enemy. She says the “Teachers” are so far behind, they’ll be out anyway, so they decide to not use the U-Turn. They head to the Gem Gallery.

The “Teachers” are marveling looking at the sites, just as the others did. They particularly love seeing a baby zebra. Vanessa and Ralph are still walking, searching for “Hilary Clin Ton.” They stop and ask for directions again, and see Big Brother, realizing they must be close. Yet, they need to find the clue, and it’s highly unlikely Big Brother is going to help them and tell them where it is. Redhead Rachel sees them walking around confused, and figures it’s good for them. Indeed. Vanessa and Ralph argue, as the “Teachers” are waiting for a break to get back in the game. Finally a young boy shows them the tiny cart they were missing, and they decide to do Air Supply, again not a bad ’80s band.

As Nary and Jamie are arriving and knowing they need to really hurry, Border Patrol finally makes it to the front of their line. They’re imagining having to do this every day just to get water. They get their containers filled and take off to deliver them. Blonde Rachel is remembering just a few hours ago looking at the “bamboons,” but now it’s race time. Dave corrects her that they’re called “baboons.” They reach the gallery and find a clue telling them to head to Margaret’s Farm. Kentucky gets there just after them. They get back on their road in search of the farm and encourage their driver to pass Rachel and Dave. Their goal is to just stay in the game, but they would like to experience first place just once. If that’s the point, then wait and do it on the all-important last leg.

Border Patrol is still pushing their water back. They marvel at all the people out and about and that the everyone wants to help them. They get the water delivered and get the next clue to head to the Double U-Turn. As much as they want to enjoy the place, they know they need to get there. They find the Double U-Turn, and seeing no one U-Turned assume no one’s been there and that they’re the first. They U-Turn Brendon and Rachel, and marvel at how clean they themselves look in the picture that pops up. They explain they’re done with Big Brother and that they made a deal with Rachel and Dave. They’re hoping Rachel and Dave will show up behind them and U-Turn the teachers/cops, whatever they are.

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