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Real Housewives of Orange County, Ep. 8 – “Dirty Housewives”

Mud, singing papers, and the results.

Heather takes her doctor-husband in for a wardrobe makeover since he has the style of a doctor. How do they dress exactly, doctors?

Terry goes “Is it even possible to upgrade from this?” Gotta love this guy’s humor, really. Slade could take some pointers. It’s subtle—and funny.

Like the adorable couple they are, Tamra and Eddie make a gym trip to work out together.

“Do you feel stronger? Do you feel empowered?” My God, Eddie sounds like a real keeper.

Vicki checks in on Brianna, and we all finally get answers. Thankfully there’s no cancer! Yay! Brianna’s thyroid hormones will be replaced. All Vicki wants to do is see her daughter and give her a big hug. It’s the greatest feeling. Vicki updates Tamra and now it’s time to celebrate.

“Really Heather, are you kidding me right now? This house is like a museum!” Tamra is stunned by the mansion.

Heather sees the place everyday, so it’s whatever, darling. More exercising. Whoo! Who needs to go all the way to the gym downtown? Heather has one in her home, and that’s where she and Tamra work out. A mud run for charity comes up in conversation so you know what that means. Can’t wait for that.

Sadly Alexis won’t able to participate because she’s recovering from her “sinus surgery.” She’s in agony while stuck at home. Gretchen finally visits her pal who’s in bed donning a surgeon’s mask.

More divorce talk with Tamra and Vicki. Tamra’s strongly considering signing the divorce papers. It’s been over a year at this divorce shindig for the two ladies.

The ladies and their men arrive at the charity mud race. Everybody’s pumped and ready to go, even glamorous Heather. It definitely gets dirty. The mud, obstacle course, running, panting, shouting, clothing clinging to the bodies—it’s quite a sight. Among all this excitement, Gretchen sprains her ankle. Terry quickly diagnoses her. She may or may not be able to perform in the Pussycat Dolls show in Vegas.

Alexis is missing out on all the fun, but she’s getting a follow-up on her surgery. I really hope all the pain is worth it. The results are in: she can breathe, and most importantly, the hump is gone. Watch out, world.

Back on the muddy obstacle course, Eddie pops his finger out of whack. Tamra sees it bending the wrong way. I know how that is, having experienced a broken toe that suddenly popped the wrong way after a collision with a firm, solid object.

Changing dirty diapers for eight years makes the mud an easy match for Heather. She’s doing great on the course. Eddie goes on strong with his broken finger. Thank goodness there’s a doc in the house for quick diagnoses.

It is really refreshing to have everyone getting along so well. Lunch should be breezy. Everyone laughs about their injuries and — oh my — Heather has some kind of muddy-hairdo thing going on. It still looks trendy, as expected. Slade brags about achievements from some twenty years ago, stuff I’m sure went over Gretchen’s head and everyone else’s.

Vicki also missed out on the muddy fun. Looks like date night for her and Brooks. The time has come for Tamra to sign her divorce papers. Going down memory lane, she recalls the sucky times with her soon-to-be-ex and it brings tears to her eyes. The attorney enters with the papers. Now recalling all the good times with her ex brings about mixed emotions. She thinks about her kids and questions what’s about to happen.

Tamra waives the spousal support. Wants to cut all ties, save for the kids. The last fifteen years of her life gets dissolved with the sign of a pen. She phones Vicki, feeling horrible. Guess it’s too early for even a mini celebration. Moving forwards now. No regrets. Time to make a new life.

On the next episode: Alexis is much more comfortable in front of cameras with her new nose. Gretchen gets some vocal practice. Tamra’s breast reduction looks like it’s underway.

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