home Archive Oh, The Irony! – Survivor: Vanuatu, Episode 13

Oh, The Irony! – Survivor: Vanuatu, Episode 13

by LauraBelle

Mark Burnett loves nothing more than to keep us guessing with his editing; tonight was no exception. Many times he’ll set it up so that you think it is obviously going one way, only to have it surprisingly go the other in the end. Sometimes it goes just the way we expected it would. And sometimes, just like tonight, you change your mind about which way it’s going as much as the players do.

As the final five come back to camp, Twila is p.o.’d still about being called out on swearing on her son. It’s hard to tell exactly what she is saying, though, as the editors keep beeping out her multitude of curse words. Twila is mainly addressing Eliza, and says she is tired of hearing about it, and the only one she has to answer to is her son when she gets home. Tired about it or not, she is the one that keeps talking about it. Eliza talks to Julie about it, and says she was trying to apologize. Julie, for her part, must be chilly tonight, as they blurred her buff out as she wore it as a tube top. Eliza continues to talk, no surprise there, and says nobody talks to her like that (of course not, they normally can’t get a word in edgewise); she won’t tolerate it.

Chris tells the camera that he knew Twila going off like that wasn’t a good thing, as it was jeopardizing her position in the game. Julie is trying to elicit Eliza’s vote, first asking if she would consider voting Twila out. Julie realizes Eliza is tight with Chris, and will only go ahead with his approval. At this point, Twila still looks safe.

At the reward challenge, it’s time for second chances. With a series of four separate rounds and eliminations, the first race will be through the mud pit. Scout is so far behind she doesn’t even fit in the camera range with the others. Chris comes in first, followed by Eliza, Twila, and Julie, with Scout easily eliminated. The next change is a redux of the pig wrangling, which I am sure Eliza was none too happy to see again. Chris catches one first, followed by Julie, then Twila. Those darn pigs remain elusive for Eliza. Oh, the irony! Eliza is eliminated.

The third challenge is the tiki building. Chris gets off to a great start, and begins building his on the ground, then sets it on the pole, thinking he finished way before Julie and Twila. Jeff Probst simply tells him it’s not correct. The camera shows us a piece Chris has forgotten behind him that he doesn’t see. Julie and Twila eventually finish, with Chris still not getting it. Jeff Probst shows him the missing piece, and Chris is beside himself. It seem his mind can play people real well, yet it can’t play puzzles. Oh, the irony. Chris is eliminated, leaving Twila and Julie to fight the last one.

Julie and Twila will walk across a beam, untie the slingshot, and the first to shoot and break three tiles wins. Julie gets off to an early lead on the beam as Twila falls, and seems to injure her ankle. Twila catches up, but is no match for Julie, who breaks her three tiles with great ease.

Julie’s reward will be to horseback ride to watch a volcano, eat a hot dog dinner, and spend the night. Jeff Probst asks who she would like to bring with. Julie says it’s ironic, as none of these people would have chosen her. She ends up choosing Chris, knowing she needs to talk some strategy with him. I can’t keep from thinking it was a stupid move on her part to win. Everyone else has an alliance together, and she’s trying to break through it. So she shows them how well she can win challenges? Not good when you’re trying to stick around for Final Four. I am still thinking Twila is safe.

Julie and Chris are picked up on horseback by a guide named Joe Turu from Tanana. Chris’s horse is off to a slow start, refusing to cross the water, and eventually picks up speed, joining the rest. The horse seems just like Chris in the first episode of the show, how he was nearly eliminated for falling on a balance beam, yet remained on the show, picking up steam, and being one of the final five. Oh, the irony!

Joe guides them to a feast of foot long hot dogs, sauerkraut and all the fixings, hot chocolate, beer and wine. He even shows Chris and Julie how to steam the hot dogs in the rocks. As they digest their food, Julie brings up the possibility of voting out Twila. Chris tells her he is not tight with Twila, and admits Julie has never done anything to hurt him. Chris seems to be weighing his options.

Back at Alinta, Eliza is grappling with Twila again. She wants a banana, but Twila has hidden them to let them ripen. Eliza wants one now, and is upset that Twila isn’t sharing. Eliza gets upset and says then she will just to get her own bananas and bury them. Scout and Twila laugh at her getting this flustered. After, Twila and Eliza both call each other childish.

Once darkness arrives, Julie, Chris and Joe watch the volcano erupt from near the mouth of it. I note that is looks like the fourth of July, and seconds later Chris utters the same thing.

As Julie and Chris arrive back at camp, he hugs Eliza, Scout and Twila, telling them they’re still solid, and that nothing has changed. Privately, he tells the camera he’s not too sure; he’s still weighing his options to see what’s best for him. With Julie, he would be guaranteed Final Three. Hmm, editing is now making me think Chris might be changing his mind. Chris notes that he doesn’t trust any of the women, and none of them trust each other, and the oddest thing is they all seem to trust him. Oh, the irony!

It’s story time at the Immunity Challenge. Jeff Probst will tell them a story of a legendary local man, and they will need to go to six separate stations and answer questions based on the story. In one bag is black charms designating the wrong answer, in another white designating right. If they’re wrong, they need to go out and try a different station and come back later. If they get it right, they add the charm to their necklace. The first one with five charms on their necklace, wins.

The story is about a chief who, after he conquers all, sets peace as his first goal, and then is murdered by his own brother. We never see Scout answer one question right. We see Twila answer one, and is on her way to a second. Chris gets two right, and the foot race is between Eliza and Julie with Eliza winning immunity.

Eliza is quite happy, being guaranteed a spot in Final Four. She’s even happier thinking Chris will go with her and Julie to vote off Twila. He is then seen talking to Scout and Twila on the beach, making Eliza nervous. Twila is actually asking Chris to let her know if she is going. He assures her she is not. Okay, I am thinking Chris has just been snowing Eliza and Julie all along then. When he is done, Eliza fights with him to keep their Final Two deal. Twila walks up, and Eliza says they are done taking. Twila tells her she’s got freakin’ immunity; she doesn’t have anything to worry about; just chill out!

Chris is back to being in his quandary, promising everyone he is doing right by them, but not feeling safe with either choice, since he doesn’t trust any of them. He says they are thick as thieves, being women. He has promised both pairs he is solidly with them, and they are all guaranteed Final Three. Twila doubts Chris, saying people have murdered for less than a million, or sworn on their son apparently. Mark Burnett really has us guessing now. Where Chris seemed solidly with Twila and Scout before, he now seems solidly with Julie and Eliza as well.

At Tribal Council, Jeff Probst asks Twila if everybody is deserving of being in Final Five. When she replies she doesn’t know, he asks if she doesn’t know or won’t say. She finally says yes, some don’t belong here. Eliza pipes up and says it’s her, by the way, that Twila doesn’t feel deserves to be there. She says she believes they all belong; though, she doesn’t like them all. Chris says it’s the toughest vote he has cast yet, because he is caught in the middle.

Scout votes, and we see her vote for Julie, and she tells her to go back to her roots, whatever that means. She seems like a natural brunette to me. Twila and Julie vote silently, but we can be sure they weren’t voting for themselves. Eliza votes for Twila saying she’s been trying to get rid of her for thirty-six days. We don’t see Chris’s vote, but we hear him say that it’s really tough, but he has to play the game.

The votes are counted, and Julie and Twila are tied at two apiece. Jeff Probst reads the final vote, saying the fourteenth person voted out of Survivor: Vanuatu is Julie. Eliza is smirking away, waiting to hear Twila’s name, and when she hears him say Julie, she is so shocked. It’s priceless. Eliza is so smart, but can’t figure out people. Chris, not showing himself to be a Rhodes Scholar at challenges, and not having good balance, is smartest at manipulating people and balancing the two different sides.

Oh, the irony!

I welcome questions and comments at LauraBelle@realityshack.com.


Freelance writer, webmaster of realityshack.com, chief editor at applemagazine.com, contribtor to TechLife News and maketecheasier.com, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.