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Real Housewives of Atlanta, Ep. 16 – “Peaches and Screams”

Anniversary Party, F-Word, and Sweetie. 

“Sweetie!” Kim calls and the day has begun. Kim’s straitening up the house for Kroy’s return. Boxes and stuff are everywhere. She and assistant, Sweetie, are butting heads more now than ever. “I’m gonna fire Sweetie.” If Kim doesn’t mean it now, she’s strongly considering it.

Kim chases Sweetie around the large house, with suspicion of smoking cigarettes on the job. Not exactly fun and games this time around for those two.

In the vein of Miss Phaedra Parks’ “everyone knows,” in order to become a certified mortician, one must embalm at least ten bodies. Phaedra is definitely getting in on this. After all, this lawyer has a funeral business in the horizons. There’s great money in burying the dead, I suppose. I’ve heard lawyers can be a little greedy, but that may not be the case here. Mortician-in-training Phaedra starts with applying makeup to a dummy and jokes around to make light of the situation.

“The face is a canvas and I’m a painter.” At least she’s taking this seriously.

Peter gets last minute preparations done for the one-year anniversary party. Cynthia walks in on one of his calls and talks of budget arise. He may have gone over budget and may have to borrow some money for Cynthia. He may want a limousine to pick him and Cynthia up for their anniversary party. But he certainly does not want Mallory, Cynthia’s sister, along for the ride. “She’s not going to be in the car with us.” Peter means that.

Kim is in over her head. The move, new baby, her girls in school, housework, and just life altogether is taking a toll. Capital S-T-R-E-S-S-E-D. Sweetie isn’t helping like she should. Kim confides in her hair stylist about all of this, namely Sweetie. Should Kim let her go? Sweetie’s incredibly loyal and has been in Kim’s life for twelve years. She’s a friend and practically family, nevertheless lines have been crossed. Sweetie told Brielle (Kim’s daughter) to “go f*** herself”. I’m sure it was all jokes. But still. What adult says that to a kid? Seriously.

Cynthia lets Mallory know she can’t ride in the limo to the anniversary party with her and Peter. Psh, Mal’s riding — or so she thinks. “You’re not riding.” Cynthia can’t make it any clearer than that. Even I got the message. What’s also clear is that Mal and Peter aren’t getting along and haven’t been for some time. Let’s go back to last season when Peter and Cynthia finally made it to their wedding day. The only thing holding up the marriage was a little piece of paper to allow them to marry. And Mal and her mom were holding onto that for dear life. So, it’s a little understandable why Peter’s pissed with Mal and Cynthia’s family overall.

Gregg (NeNe’s soon-to-be-ex-husband) picks Bryson up from jail. They have a talk with Bryson, who wants to own a restaurant in the future. Seems a little random, but we’ll go with it. He has to stop making dumb moves because NeNe’s had it up to her neck. “You have to move out,” she tells him. “It’s time.” She smacks one hand into the other and it’s final.

Peter’s chewing someone out on the phone about the limo. Sounds like Peter rented one that had already been bought. I hope that doesn’t happen often in the business. Cynthia’s a big believer in signs and so am I. Sure, this is probably a sign for the night ahead, Cyn, but I’d think about the bigger picture. Like an indication for the whole of that marriage…

The anniversary event is elegant and has a way better turnout than Bar One’s opening. The air conditioning is working, the people can roam about without bumping elbows, and Cynthia’s mom and sister aren’t there … Wait, that’s not right I don’t think.

NeNe makes her grand appearance. She may even be “on time.” She heads right over to Marlo, who’s date (Dave) is definitely not the football player (Charles) introduced earlier in the season. Quite the opposite, in fact. *whispers* The girls are all wondering if this is a new Sugar Daddy of Marlo’s. Methinksso.

Cynthia is a little tensed at her own anniversary party. Her mom and sister arrive, which perks her up some. That mood doesn’t last long with Mallory and their mom admitting “SHOCK” over Cynthia and Peter making it a whole year in marriage. That’s not what I’d want to hear at my one-year anniversary party.

“I got this. Where’s the champagne?” Cynthia snaps into motion and heads downstairs to her party.

Sheree and Laurence are back together for good ol’ gossip on the car ride to the anniversary party. She lets him know Marlo dropped the F-word-that-rhymes-with-maggot during the South African Safari excursion. Sheree’s tattling again. Only, I’m with her this time since Marlo was in the wrong for that.

They arrive and Sheree gives a quick phone call to Kim, asking if she’s coming to the anniversary party. Kim gives an excuse as to why she isn’t. The excuse sounds legit: Cynthia talked smack about her in Africa — according to Sheree. Why the heck would she come to the woman’s anniversary party? Didn’t Kandi mention how Kim comes up with any excuse not to attend an event she doesn’t feel like going to? Let’s just shrug it off for now.

Laurence confronts Marlo about the infamous F-word with Sheree at his side, ready for the show.

Marlo comes back with “I would never say f****t.”

WTF?! Chick, millions of people heard and saw you say the word on TV, dissing Sheree. Wow, Marlo. She reaches a new level of crazy tonight.

Peter calls for friends and family — everyone except Mallory — in an announcement of his and Cynthia’s anniversary. Tension, tension, tension. The first time he fails to mention Mal is rude. The next few times he deliberately does so and embarrasses her. Not cool at all. Actually it’s a little childish.

This leads to a confrontation between Cynthia and Mallory after the fact.

“Stop defending him!” Mallory shouts.

The party guests are starting to notice the tension within the family now if they didn’t before. Cynthia is once again caught between her Peter and her family, in the middle where she didn’t want to be. A rock and hard place. That’s gotta suck big time.

On the next episode: Kandi works with Jo some more on country songwriting. Sheree talks about unexpected turns in relationships with her oldest daughter, who may have news of her own. Kandi and Kim get together again to hash things out — hopefully — calmly. Cynthia and her sister, Mallory, discuss the anniversary party and family problems. NeNe has doubts about finalizing the divorce from Gregg. Phaedra’s son has a birthday party, and you know this is going to be extravagant.

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