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Captain Swan and Tooth Decay

by Panndyra, Goddess of Chaos

I must say that each week this series gets better and better. Oh yes! The stories get sobbier and the women get more plastic. The two contestants were Delisa S and Lorraine N. Delisa is a Captain in the Army Reserve. She grew up in East Texas (poor girl! Anna Nicole Smith is from East Texas…poor Delisa!)

Delisa received sun damage to her skin in exchange for her service in Desert Storm. She admits that she doesn’t feel feminine. Her body’s too thick. She also has trouble with her husband. They’ve been on and off for a while. Jason, her ‘hubby’, admits that he lost interest in her. She wasn’t physically attractive to him. Her weight gain became an issue. Delisa said that they didn’t have the emotional or the physical, so they had nothing. She’s not sure what’s going to happen, but hopes the Swan experience will help her either way.

Dr. Dubrow said she was a ‘handsome’ woman and his challenge is to turn her into a pretty one.

Her Swan program includes:

*fat transfer from cheeks to lips
*mid-face lift
*tummy tuck
*breast lift
*upper and lower retainers to straighten out her teeth
*zoom bleaching
*1,200 calorie a day diet

Next up is Lorraine N. She had a difficult childhood with a verbally and emotionally abusive mother. She’s a court reporter with 4 children. She says that she was also picked on in school and still carries the scars of her traumatic childhood.

She also got dentures at the age of 25. Her mother didn’t take her for dental exams while she was growing up. Losing her teeth has been a source of shame and embarrassment for her.

Her husband, Brandon, is upset when she doesn’t believe the compliments he pays her. He loves her and thinks she looks great, but she can’t accept it. She thinks that he’ll leave her for someone prettier or younger or…anything. She says that she’s feels like she’s “Nothing, but some day I’ll be something.”

Dr. Worth, the oral surgeon, says that Lorraine’s transformation will be the most extensive in the Swan program thus far. Dr. Haworth and Dr. Worth have to work together to fix her face.

Lorraine’s program includes:

*nose job
*brow lift
*fat transfer from cheeks to lips
*lip lift
*chin reduction
*upper & lower – titanium implants
*hearing aid
*liposuction in knees & legs

The ladies get started by reading letters from their families. Delisa feels like “this is my new beginning.” She goes to see Dr. Dubrow. He tells us that she has a nice shape, but she has a lot of body fat that she’ll need to work it out at the gym.

Delisa learns about his plans for her and she’s excited, especially about the photofacials.

Lorraine starts off the program with a day at the dentist. She’s getting her implants. She’ll need 5 weeks to heal and will be on a liquid diet. Delisa is also having issues with her restrictive diet. She has a sweet tooth and is afraid she won’t stick to her plan.

Meanwhilel, Dr. Haworth sees Lorraine, who’s still in pain from her dental procedures, and cheks her face. He’s trying to figure out how to fix her chin and lips so that her new tooth will be complimentary to her new face.

Before surgery, Delisa talked with her husband. He said he saw a lawyer. She’s sad about it, but is looking forward to the “new me.” After surgery, she tells Dr. Dubrow that the process is “so worth it and I haven’t even seen myself yet.”

Prior to Lorraine’s surgery, Dr. Worth brought her a prelim set of teeth so Dr. Haworth could do the plastic surgery. In the end, he says the surgery went well, but recovery will be difficult and Lorraine may not be healed in time for the pageant.

Both ladies are having a terrible time recuperating. Lorraine’s in a lot of pain. Dr. Haworth gives her some pain medicine. Delisa is nauseous and feels helpless. To make matters worse, Lorraine is having a hard time being on a completely liquid diet.

Delisa gets divorce papers. Although she was expecting it, she feels sad at the demise of her marriage. Nely comes to help her. She tells her, “I’ve been there. I know what it feels like.” She hugs Delisa and they both cry. Nely was obviously touched by the experience. She’s sad because there’s just “some things you can’t coach people through.”

Delisa said that Nely’s presence was comforting.

Lorraine and her hubby have a fight. She gets angry easily. In therapy, she works on her past. Delisa works on her future.

It’s time for Lorraine’s final dental surgery. She’s scared. I would be. The dentist freaks me out!

Meanwhile, Delisa is still having trouble with her sweet tooth. She’s not losing weight fast enough. The soldier bunkers down and throws out all the dessert bars. I was proud of her.

Now, for the reveals. Delisa looked so cute. She was adorable. She didn’t look like herself at all, though. She also looked a bit like a Barbie-doll, but she was a cute Barbie doll. I wanted to take her home, brush her hair and dress her. I think I need therapy now. That doesn’t seem normal, does it?

Lorraine had a difficult process, admittedly. I forgot that she’d have to relearn how to talk, eat, laugh and so much more with new teeth. We take our teeth for granted, don’t we? (Actually, one of my biggest fears is losing my teeth. I have nightmares about it. I feel for Lorraine. She’s gone through so much.)

Amanda told her that, “I can safely say that you look nothing like your former self.” That’s an understatement!

I did notice also that Lorraine’s boobs seemed to be awfully swollen. Either that, or they were just too darn big for her petite frame. She looked like she had trouble walking.

She said, “Oh My God! I don’t even look like me. I can’t believe this. You guys are geniuses!”

In the end, Delisa moved onto the pageant. I, like Dr. Ianni, didn’t think that Lorraine was too upset about that because she honestly got what she needed and wanted out of the program and I think Delisa needed the pageant a little more.

Lorraine’s children and her husband Brandon showed up and they hugged her. Brandon said he was “blown away by his wife.”


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Freelance writer, webmaster of realityshack.com, chief editor at applemagazine.com, contribtor to TechLife News and maketecheasier.com, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.