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Survivor: One World – Ep 4 – Squashing The Beef, Or Whatever That Means

What I want to know is why, oh why, if this decision to give up immunity needed to be unanimous, why did Bill and Leif agree to go? Leif was targeted publicly by Tarzan for his loose lips, and Bill was clearly in danger. It makes no sense for them to agree to this cockamamie plan. The stupidity was just too much. Probst’s face was priceless as the men came in for Tribal. I think Colton was stupid for coming up with the plan – but I think the other seven were more stupid for going along. Who’s more foolish, the fool or the fool who follows?

But that ridiculous move was not even the most jaw dropping part of the show. Colton, the man who called Bill ghetto trash last week, upped the ante at Tribal. It was one part racist, and two parts class warfare. That’s the funny thing – all of the talk has been about the racism, but I think this was more of classism. He mocked Bill’s choice to be a standup comedian. Now, if he was mocking his material, I’d be ok with that, but no, he was mocking the choice. He was mocking how Bill needed to “get a real job” and how Bill was scraping together pennies to get by. This is the condescending nature of some on the right that has placed me firmly in the left. “Getting a real job” is the old standby for those in the 1%, many of whom, like Colton, have never had to work a day in their whole life. Every time I hear that, well, I want to say this.

Then Colton veered back to racism. He explained that he went to a private, all-white school in Alabama. But he has African-Americans in his life…you know, his housekeeper. The standard – “I’m not a racist, some of my best friends are black” excuse. The man is completely out of his mind. This is one of the reasons I chose to move to a more diverse region instead of the lilliest of white neighborhoods. I want my boy to experience other cultures, and people that don’t look and think just like he does. Mainly, I don’t want my kid to grow up to be Colton. And that is as strong of an insult as I can imagine.

He is truly a villain. I see what Probst was talking about pre-season. I mean, he called Leif a Munchkin and an Oompa Loompa. Maybe he’ll go obscure and call him a Peck next. He may shape up to be the most unlikable villain ever. Even Russell was somewhat likable to watch in Samoa – being the underdog helped, and led to some (like me) to respect his gameplay and even consider rooting for him. Hatch was tame compared to this. Boston Rob had charisma. Phil was insanely charming. Even NaOnka’s insanity had a shred of humanity underneath. Fairplay was a shameless villain, but he was not blatantly mean. In fact, if Fairplay was in the Pearl Islands finals, he may have actually had a shot. I like to give the benefit of the doubt to some of these people on these shows – you can do a lot of manipulating in the editing booth. Colton? Not editing. That’s him. And it is awful.

The ironic thing? And Bill said it in the exit clip we got at the end. He judged me for our differences, but I accepted him for his. I will say that I cannot imagine, no matter how sheltered of a life he led, that it could not have been easy growing up gay in a rich Republican Alabama family. In fact, it is something that could have, and should have, built character and given an understanding into the plight of others. It didn’t. The kid (because he really isn’t a man) is just sad and pathetic, and we are going to have to watch him be a Mean Girl for the next several weeks.

Man, so much, on just a couple of topics! Let’s go into the challenges, and then the Top 10. That should give us enough time to go take a shower and wash off the stench of the Evil Queen (dude calls himself a queen, I think that’s fair game) and the festering stupidity and move forward to the next episode.

Reward Challenge – The tribes have to fling coconuts, using a giant slingshot at a giant game of Connect Four. Or in this case, Connect Five. The coconuts need to break the planks to open the square. The prize is a choice between pillows/blankets, a tarp or donuts and coffee. The boys were ready for donuts, and the ladies need the tarp really badly. Some of the hits come from Tarzan, Mike, Monica, Sabrina, Jay, Alicia, Kat, Kim, and Monica again for the win…and notice none from the guy in charge.

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