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Survivor: One World – Ep 1 – Tough Breaks And Disputed Chickens

So, the challenge. It was fairly simple – leap 20 feet down to a bouncy netting, roll off, and once the tribe all reaches the bottom cross a balance beam. There is one thing we have learned in these challenges – balance beams favor the ladies. Vanuatu’s opening challenge set the stage for much of the season as the guys struggled mightily – the same with Amazon. Alas, we will never know if One World would follow suit. Because these morons were simply unable to follow Probst’s simple directions. Jump, but cross your arms. Many failed. Nina faceplanted and now looks like a science experiment gone wrong. However, poor Kourtney landed badly and came up cradling her wing. Probst stopped the challenge after Kourtney said she was dizzy – and she left to get an X-ray.

For some reason, they called the challenge for the guys who led at the point of her injury. I don’t understand that – why not just have them remove a guy from the balance beam to even the score and pick up where they left off? Give the ladies a fighting chance! Anyway, Probst gives the boys the choice – take the win, or finish the challenge. Proving they are not completely out of their mind – the guys take the immunity. Because, well, it’s friggin immunity!!

So, the ladies go to Tribal Council and Probst says that Kourtney’s status will be revealed after they all talked. In other words – she’s out. Because why wouldn’t she return for the actual Tribal Council? The only interesting part of Tribal was the continuation of Christina’s fire deal argument. The best part? Christina telling Alicea to shut up. I now like her. And like Cochran wanted, I am officially calling her by her last name. Cha. Sounds much cooler. So, Kourtney is out – no more ridiculous wool hats, no glow in the dark tattoos of motorcycles. Her time was likely limited anyway – she was not part of the Fit Girls Plus Kat alliance, and her first words on the show were that she didn’t fit in. Not the actions of a future Sole Survivor.

Treemail Top 10
• Gay Cochran seems to have little bitchy quips at the ready – it’s almost as if he’s been practicing some one liners in front of the mirror. That Taylor Swift line was just brutal. I will choose to ignore his clunkers – but I promise to blog about his first funny line if any when it ever happens. Same with Bill the Comedian – if he ever gets some screen time. Interesting, most comedians say many funny things to garner attention. He’s a very different kind of funny man.
• Some funny shirt moments – first, Tarzan’s shirt seems to have come from Frank Costanza’s cabana wear collection. Second, I found it amusing that when Probst told them to strip…the truck, Chelsea took off her sweater which was tied around her waist. She thought they were going to strip. She totally did. Third, Kourtney’s weird hat. Fourth, Leif’s cool hat.
• I love the tribe names. Not for any other reason than that they remind me of other things. The Manono tribe sounds like the fake name Monica used in that Season 1 Friends episode when that other woman stole Monica’s identity, and she and Phoebe wound up befriending her. And the Salani tribe just sounds like the name of the DC wedding crashers – who have now made Journey relevant again.
• I like how the show gave us some labels when the two alliances began to form so we knew who was whom. That’s very helpful in episode 1. That Alicea/Kim/Chelsea/Sabrina/Kat alliance should be interesting as it develops. Kim doesn’t believe in girl power – but she is going with it. They have some big legacies of female alliances to follow – Vanuatu ladies came close to dominating, and the Black Widow Alliance did. Girl power can work – just stick with it ladies.
• The only thing that would have made the chicken chase sequence better would be if they played Dukes of Hazard music as they ran after them. Although Matt’s line was worth it – “she’ll come to her sense when she quits being a hero…and will come and bring us a chicken.” This is now two Survivor premieres that had some very funny Chicken moments.
• Gay Cochran is interesting – how can he just sit around during the shelter building? And the constant fraternizing with the ladies? Also not a good move this early. Even if that did get him an idol. Nice change on the idols – they are assigned to the tribe. So Sabrina manages to find the idol in the first 30 seconds she tried (so much for making it harder to find them), but she found the dudes’ idol. So, of course, she gave it to Gay Cochran in an effort to oust Matt somewhere down the road.
• At least Gym Rat members Mike and Matt seem to have some intelligence – I watched Jay’s confessional twice and I am still not really sure if he was actually speaking English.
• Gay Cochran says that Matt thinks he’s a puppet. But the question is whether he’s a Man of a Muppet.
• Interesting how Kourtney left the challenge in a sling – something we saw at the end of the episode, not during the challenge. Would anyone have thought that she was going to come back if the sling made an appearance? Now, where does the broken wrist rank among all-time Survivor injuries? Skupin is still on top and I am afraid to think of an injury that would beat that one. Next is Good Russell, then Bruce’s blockage, and then the broken wrist. And that’s my expert medical opinions for you. I mean, I did get a 5 on my bio AP in high school.
• Extra Treemail #11 – There is not enough cash in the world to make me watch that Rob Schneider show. And the fact that it beats Parks & Recreation in the ratings just saddens me to no end.

Votes - None. Kourtney out from injury.

Next week – Ladies continue to struggle and Gay Cochran seems to be a virus.

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