home Archive No Bones About It – Survivor: Vanuatu, Episode 9

No Bones About It – Survivor: Vanuatu, Episode 9

[i]by atarus[/i]

The after-effects of the previous tribal council are not surprising. Ami is proud of herself because “we shocked the shiznit out of the guys.” Chris, ever the level-headed strategist, says that the TC was a surprise, and that he had put too much trust in Julie and Twila. Twila says that even though Sarge gave me his word, I couldn’t trust the men. Chris says that if Julie and Twila were worried that they were at the end of their pecking order, where do they think they are at in the women’s pecking order after being away from Yasur for such a long time? (Chris has definitely become my favorite this season. I picked him from just bios as my favorite, then I wavered between Sarge and Twila as the show progressed, but I have definitely settled back to Chris, just because I think he is the best strategist of the bunch, and he’s entertaining at the same time.)

Sarge is down because he thought that Twila was sincere, and he doesn’t understand her reasoning behind voting with the women. He says that the women are all conniving, and hats off to them for fooling him. In a funny picture, we are treated to Scout getting her hippy on, and singing while doing her hair, while Sarge broods and looks generally pissed off at the world.

It’s now time for the pecking order revelation challenge! Ever since this challenge single-handedly changed the Marquesas’ boot order, Mark Burnett has used this to hopefully stir up the game. However, it has never managed to work. Maybe the Marquesas was magical.

Anyway, for this reward challenge, the winner gets a helicopter ride and a picnic with champagne and chicken wings. And we start off lighting torches. In quick succession Sarge, Chad, and Chris in that order (reveal pecking order much, ladies?) are eliminated, and the threesome heckles the women, saying “oh it’s not a women vs. men thing, is it?” Next eliminated is Eliza, who broods along with the men. Julie follows her, leaving the foursome of older women, Ami, Leann, Twila, and Scout…who happen to be that alliance from the very beginning. Anyone notice that? Julie? Eliza? Guys? No? ….Damn. Anyway, Scout and Ami are eliminated next, and it’s Leann vs. Twila. And Leann wins, and takes herself fifteen years ago. Aka Julie.

Leann says that she took Julie because she was the only one where she was unsure of where her head was at. The twosome enjoy the scenic view and the champagne and chicken wings. They talk strategy, and Leann offers Julie final 4 with her, Ami, and I believe Twila. Julie accepts. They also talk about how maybe they could get rid of Eliza over Chris. So, according to this strategy talk combined with the reward challenge, the boot order will be Sarge, Chad, Eliza, Chris, Scout, Twila, with Julie, Leann, and Ami in the final 3. Yeah, right, okay, let’s look for a major shake-up in alliances soon. All-Stars was way too predictable, the great Burnett wouldn’t hand us a boot order like that on a silver platter for this season.

Back at camp, Scout and Eliza get into an argument, Scout saying that you have to understand that the challenge was a game, and you have to take out the smartest first. Eliza is grumpy, and confesses that she was mad that it seemed like Scout and Twila specifically targetted her. Scout confesses she’s been fed up with Eliza since day two. Chris, Chad, and Sarge go out on the boat and discuss the challenge. Chris says that Scout will burn Eliza, and the threesome decide to try and sabotage Eliza’s game and get her voted out.

Next up is what I think is one of the rottenest things ever done on Survivor. While the guys are still out on the boat, Julie and Leann return and give just the ladies chicken wings. The girls are all excited and eat the chicken wings, and none of them feel guilty at all. But if that wasn’t bad enough, they decide to humiliate the guys and give them the bones of the chicken wings they just ate, and say that’s all they could bring back. How disgusting is that? I lost all respect for any of these women now. That was just…awful. Even though Chad is clueless in gameplay and Sarge turned into a grumpy ol’ fart, I highly doubt they would have subjected the women to such humiliation if they’d won.

Eliza goes to get the treemail and finds a pig. She has trouble dragging the pig to camp, so she calls on Chris to help her carry it into camp. (That’s right. All women final 6? Who’s gonna carry the pig then?) Sarge and Twila want to attack the pig with a machete, but Eliza tells them no. Sarge is disappointed that he can’t have bacon for breakfast, it was almost as big of a letdown as letting Estrogen City move into Lopevi.

The immunity challenge is a ho-hum boring puzzle challenge. The three men are eliminated right away, and Ami wins immunity. Joy.

Ami is worried she’s going to be seen as a threat since she’s already seen as a stronger woman, but she can’t let herself play badly. Sarge feels like he’s done for, but there could be a twist and Eliza could go home. Chad and Chris try to sway Scout’s vote, and Eliza talks to Leann about being paranoid of how Scout will vote. Scout knows that there is tension between her and Eliza, and she sees that Julie and Leann have gotten close lately, and she feels like the chicken wing trip could have bumped her down in the pecking order. Twila talks with Sarge, and Sarge points out honestly what he was planning on doing, and Twila feels bad. She says that she thought the guys were playing her and she screwed up when she didn’t vote with them. She respects the guys more and she let them down. Chad suddenly has a revelation that maybe if they sway Eliza instead of target her, they may have a better chance. (You can almost see the gears in his head turning, huh.) Chris has the last confessional saying that your strategies change immediately in the game, and that you have to watch what you say when you don’t have the numbers.

At Tribal Council Eliza admits that she was pissed off, and she was annoyed that she was the only woman that came to TC with her bag packed. (Isn’t that arrogance for you? I hate the women.) Sarge and Twila admit to the entire group what happened last round, with Twila not trusting the men and making a mistake even though she felt more at home with the men. Leann feels like the guys came down hard on Twila and Julie, and Chris says that the game is still going, everybody is still playing.

It’s time to vote, and the only vote we are shown is Chris’s, who votes for Sarge, saying “This isn’t a vote against you, it’s a vote for you.” Or something. Anyway, Eliza and Julie both get a vote, but Sarge is the one voted out of TC. And I’m left with two people to root for. I swear, if the final 6 is all women, I’ll scream and die.

Next time, Scout “makes her move” and Ami doesn’t fully trust the ladies. Oh, and there’s a bad storm too.

Sarge’s Final Words: He enjoyed himself, it’s another chip in his foundation, and good luck to y’all because he doesn’t want to be there when they tear each other’s heads off.

I picked after episode 2 had aired that Chris would be the winner of this game. I still stand by that notion, because I can’t bear the thought that a woman will win Survivor four times in a row. So c’mon Chris, don’t disappoint me. You said at the beginning when you said that “the men are easy to manipulate, but the women stick together.” You can break them though! Please break them! My e-mail is atarus33@yahoo.com, if you’re on your knees begging to the Survivor gods to let Chris win, e-mail me. Until next week!


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