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Top Chef: Texas – Ep 10 – Destroyed By Restaurant Wars

RILCK. We learned this week that there are three more challenges remaining before the last chef standing comes back. This means RILCK winner will meet up with the Final Four. Currently, another woman stands waiting to come back, so that’s five. And Nyesha is on a roll, so don’t rule her out.

Her roll continued this week as The Destroyer faced her. They had to make a dessert in 30 minutes. Tom gave them a sous chef of their choosing, and defending champ Nyesha got the first pick. Proving that she is quite badass, she chose Heather despite not liking her. Why? Because she knew The Destroyer would want her because they worked together before. Bad. Ass. The Destroyer chose Malibu and both teams actually put forward a solid dish.

Nyesha – Coconut and Lime Tart with Coconut Crème Fraiche Mousse and Caramel Sauce

The Destroyer – Puff Pastry with Park Chocolate Mascarpone Cream, Vanilla Bean Rum Cherries and Caramel Sauce

Tom liked The Destroyer’s pastry, said 8 out of 10 would overcook it, but Nyesha’s was restaurant ready and worth another win for her.

Quickfire Hits
• Edward continues his snarkfest – We all know Sarah’s weakness, BBQ in the sun. Zing
• Lindsay of the Corn may have opened lots of restaurants for Michelle Bernstein, but she did NOT have the temperment for doing it in five hours. She was too relaxed when she needed to be intense, and too intense when she needed to be relaxed. If Bev was cooking for you, let her cook. You make sure the judges don’t wait that long to sit down. If you guys lose, call her out at Judges Table.
• One lesson learned this week for future Restaurant Warriors – do NOT have an open kitchen. The Judges watched, entralled, by the guys’ issues with executing. They did not see the behind the scenes drama going on in the ladies’ kitchen. That may have been a factor in the decision making process. Although, the quality of the food seemed to be much better from the distaff side.
• And STOP with the stupid tiny names for these restaurants, and the signs that refuse to use capital letters. Canteen? I kept expecting Alec Baldwin to molest Adam Sandler. Half Bushel? What does that even mean – congrats diners, you get half portions! Dumb.
• Did Glasses really channel Paris Hilton by reacting to an Almond Joy dessert with “That’s hot”? I guess he feels like a nut.
• Someone want to put Sarah’s “Beets beets beets” rant to music? Beef Tongue awaits the followup.
• After the Beverly bullying at planning, and the re-emergence of short ribs, Grayson said it well, “Why not, she’s effin good at it!”
• I know, broken record, but boy, I barely noticed Monobrow in the room when he and Padma announced the challenge. Hoo boy, Padma, that was a good outfit!
• Glasses actually quoted Star Trek. I know, stunning that he’s a sci-fi nerd, right! Anyway, despite pronouncing it wrong (no R in Kobayshi), he refered to the Kobayashi Maru test. This is the Starfleet Academy test where cadets are given the no-win scenario and tested to see how they react. Captain Kirk famously cheated on it to be it, and beat the test of death and the no-win scenario. This became a big plot point during the Wrath of Khan. Glasses uses it to describe the no-win of opening a restaurant in five hours. At that moment, we should have realized the guys were doomed, because many teams in the past have opened a restaurant during Wars well. It is not no-win if you plan apporpriately.
• Edward did a very good job in the front of the house, even joking about the long line meaning they did something right. He kept his cool, but showed that he cared that people waited. Lindsay of the Corn seemed so detached – because her mind was in the kitchen – that it showed. She is very lucky that Grayson and Beverly, and to a lesser extent Sarah, cooked their asses off this week.
• Not only did Grayson look gorgeous at the Canteen seating, but man, she’s either really tall or those other three ladies are hobbits.
• Sarah vowed to put her blood, sweat and tears in the challenge – and I say, I do NOT want to eat that dish.
• The Destroyer was very correct when he said after the service that his seasoing was off and that they should not “have played circle jerk expiditer.” Wow. Bravo’s censors either need to get the Urban Dictionary, or they will let them get away with more than I expected.
• Lindsay was Prom Queen? I buy her being top of her class, but Prom Queen?
• Why do the Stew Room chefs always shout “NOOOOOOO” when they hear one of the chefs is going home? Doesn’t that make the other ones in the bottom feel like crap?

Next week – Charlize Theron. And between her and Padma we have the tallest most attractive women on TV or the movies in one hour. Yay!

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