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Survivor: South Pacific – Finale – Bitter Jury Syndrome Strikes Again

• Amazing shot – Ozzy talking heads that something told him the other three would not change their minds, as we hear whooping and cheering from off camera. HA!
• During the whooping – and then later at the Reunion – Sophie mimed either swordplay or the Dragon Slayer moves. I don’t think we truly got the full sense of the Sophie/Coach alliance this season, but it seems a whole lot tighter than we ever realized.
• Ozzy tried to play up the warrior and Christian stuff with Coach, but to his credit, Coach knew that he couldn’t beat Ozzy. The Wiz tried to talk him into forcing a tie with Albert and a fire-making challenge. As Albert rightfully said, “I know how to make fire. But you can know how to drive, but you can’t beat Jeff Gordon.”
Vote #2 – Ozzy 3 (Albert, Coach, Sophie), Albert 1 (Ozzy)
• That makes the third time this season that Ozzy was voted out, and the fourth time in his Survivor history. Both records. Ironically, it was also the one and only time Albert’s name was written down this season.
• Oh, and the Final Three and Jury gave Ozzy a round of applause during his snuffing. Really? Applause? That seemed to be a bit much to me.
• I thought Coach had it in the bag at this point. I didn’t know truly how bitter they would be to him. I expected it to be bad, but that they’d still vote for him. Nope. Albert never saw it coming – he thought HE had it in the bag!
• Final Coach Chi session – I’m actually a bit sad to see it go. Never thought it would happen – you won me over, Coach, you crazy bastard. You won me over.
• Why was Ozzy dressed up like the Swiss Miss?
• Albert was right – Survivor is about people. He was wrong, it is also about chess. That’s why he lost.
• Ozzy got voted out with such great spirits, but came to the jury with such meanness. It’s almost as if these morons think it is a requirement to be assholes on the jury. Coach lost Ozzy here – Ozzy wanted Coach to pull a Boston Rob or a Todd and just say, the whole honor thing was bull. I played you all. But that would have actually been a lie. I truly think Coach tried to instill as much honor into Survivor as he could – to his credit. You just can’t do it. It is a dishonorable game. Ironically, he told the truth about lying and got busted for not lying.
• Best moment is when Sophie equated Coach to a 14-year-old girl – he just wanted acceptance and to fit in.
• Rice used the old “why shouldn’t the others win” question, but he added the caveat that you can’t say anything nice. Albert couldn’t do it. He had to throw in a suck up to Rice.
• Coach should have never apologized to Rick. If Rick was being as obnoxious to him as he was, he should have sensed that Rick just wanted the pound of flesh, not the words.
• Coach lost Brandon’s vote when Sophie revealed the truth about the fake idol finding. I guarantee that was what did it for Brandon. Perhaps for Edna as well. Another pointless lie by Coach that did him in.
• Whitney called Albert sleazy. The woman who cheated on her husband on TV. Insert your own insult here. I’m actually speechless from this one.
• Edna – “we signed up for this.” Word.
• Coach described to Cochran what most of the schemers on Survivor have discovered – you build the house of cards, and it looks so nice, and then just like that it can all crumble on you.
• Nowhere can I find the final vote total. We saw Probst reveal five for Sophie and three for Coach. We can assume the sixth was for Sophie. None for Albert. We know Cochran voted for Coach, and Dawn for Sophie. I saw an interview today that Brandon voted for Sophie. And Wikipedia says that Ozzy voted for her too.
• Some Reunion thoughts – The ladies all cleaned up really nicely. Biggest difference – Christine. Wow.
• Sophie said she had her finger on the pulse of the game early on – she saw the group she was in and worked within it. She called herself an observer. Not an Observer. She has always been blunt and standoffish, but supremely confident. Maybe she should be more like Dawn. Awww. Dawn really got some big love from her fellow Survivors this season.
• Coach feels he got redemption. I agree. All of the past is forgotten now – Coach 3.0 will always trump Coach 1.0.
• New word – Prayer-a-palooza. Note how I am done criticizing the religion. I got in my shots. These folks truly have faith – I try not to mock faith, just religion. I actually respect Ozzy’s answer that in nature is where he finds God. In His creation, and I bet the vast majority of Bible thumpers would never view things in that manner.
• Ozzy’s regret – not giving Cochran the idol to allay his fears about picking rocks. Not, I wish I were nicer to Cochran and not push him into Coach’s arms. Because that would have my vote.
• Last crazy Coach reference – the Seven Layers of Viking Heaven. Oh, Coach.
• Cochran still can’t get a date after being on TV? Poor Cochran – maybe he needs more coaching from Papa Bear. Nice analysis from him – he was playing defense from Day 1 and never got going. He is a “real character” and is “over the radar.” True, both. Best line from him is that being incredibly socially awkward on TV makes the real world a piece of cake.
• Love how Brandon said his family was not there for him – with Russell in the room! Shame on his family for shunning him for being genuine. Because for all of Brandon’s faults – there were no act, that was Brandon. Shame on them for giving the WWE act called Russell Hantz more attention. No more, Survivor. No more Hantz. I will cry if they really do a Russell vs. Brandon season.
• Edna is knocked up – Mr. Edna couldn’t keep his hands off her when she got back – and yes, she cleaned up really nice too – just watch the Ponderosa videos.
• Finally, what happened to the giant check on the Early Show? Can’t they do it on the new useless CBS morning show that no one watches?

And that is it, my friends. I get a month and a half off from CBS reality programming until I preview the next Survivor. Of course, I picked a Final 3 of Rice, Elyse and Whitney before this season started (although I need have pre-merge boots of Stacey, Papa Bear, Christine and Semhar).

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