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Burberry Barbie -Starting Over, 10/8/04

10/8/04

Towanda’s Board of Review continues. The tears are flowing, but not freely, and the life coaches want to know why it’s now ok to cry. “Because I’m being so honest” is her reply. Iyanla tells her she’s still controlling and that she should “cross your arms, fall back and just let it rip.” She does, and the group watches her cry for a while. The Life Coaches quiz her about control for a few minutes and she finally gets it down to not wanting to be alone if people decide she’s not perfect and then don’t like her. Iyanla is disappointed that even though Towanda is priveleged to be in the house with these “6 angels” to support her, Towanda would still assume she is unsafe. (Um, maybe she thinks someone might diss her the way she was dissing Sommer?) They give her a grade of C and tell her she needs to take some risks. Iyanla tells her she will “Not support you in your emotional and spiritual suicide.”

Later she sits with Kim, who is cheering her on, in full makeup I might add. Iyanla comes in and Kim leaves so Iyanla can give Towanda a hug and a new assignment: write your autobiography. It will be called “Here I am.” She wants Towanda to start at the very beginning because Iyanla feels there will be important information there. “Somewhere in there, you learned that it isn’t ok to be who you are.” Then Towanda is shown on the phone telling her husband about her assignment and we hear him say he wouldn’t do it. She tells him she’s lonely and asks him if he is lonely, if he misses her. The answer is an emphatic NO. Andre tells her she made the decision to go up there, and he’s just dealing with it, doing projects, moving on. She tells him he sounds pissed off and he tells her that “If you keep doing that, when you come home there’s going to be some papers in the room because you’re getting on my nerves.”

Cut to the next morning. Apparently Kim has woken Sommer up to scream at her. By the time we see them, they’re sitting on Sommer’s bed. Kim’s in nothing but a towel (well, I guess ya gotta be an exhibitionist in the first place to want to be on reality TV, right?) Sommer’s makeup bag is open and scattered and Kim is telling her that now HER makeup is in KIM’s bag. Josie is stomping around her bedroom because she was awakened by the yelling. “Can’t somebody see that they’re both wrong? Kim’s not a saint.” Towanda is trying to stay out of it. Back downstairs Kim is demanding to know why her makeup is in Sommer’s bag, that she was set up, and “Something’s rotten in the state of Denmark.” Sommer now says she never accused Kim of stealing, that she knew maybe Kim had just used the eye shadow and dropped it into her own bag, and that some of the housemates suggested maybe Kim’s daughters had used it thinking it was their mother’s. Josie comes downstairs and tells them to drop the subject because they’re too loud. Kim tells Josie to “stay in your own world”. Next we see Josie in the kitchen hollering that this was her one day to sleep in and it got ruined, that the subject of makeup should be “over”, and “I’m gonna burn everybody’s makeup bag, for real!”

Towanda is at the computer concentrating on her book.

Sommer meets with Rhonda who tells her she must make a commitment to her health. Sommer admits she cheated when dieting before her bypass surgery, not really wanting to try, for fear of failure. Rhonda reminds her that she gave up, which should feel worse than failure.

Kim is coming into Josie and Towanda’s room looking for validation. Josie tells her “please don’t come into my room to gossip” and is told to mind her own business. She tells Kim she’s just trying to be a Burberry Barbie. “I’m not going to do this dance with you, Josie,” Kim says, and Josie is waving Chloe’s bottle and hollering “don’t bring all that negativity here.”

Back to Sommer, who is exploring some of her weight issues with Rhonda. Sommer knows some of her friendships were bad, but she is afraid to be alone. Being thin will be a nightmare because she will feel like she’s competing with other thin women. Rhonda tells her the weight is an excuse, and wonders, if that’s taken away, what will you be worth?

Back to the Kim and Josie show. Kim says the makeup issue is already solved, yet Josie is butting in. Kim, Sommer, Jen and Towanda are now lining up against Josie. Sommer narrates it’s not even about makeup – it’s about trust. Kim is telling everyone she felt the cold shoulder when her kids were there, and that Snowden noticed nobody made eye contact with her.

Rhonda rounds up Jen and Sinae. “Who wants to come out and play?” She introduces the concept of interdependence, being connected to someone without having to do everything for them. Sinae is sent inside to call and invite her mother to the house. (You have not lived until you’ve listened to two grown women discussing “interdependence” in baby talk.)

Then we see Towanda sitting at a table telling Sinae her husband is threatening to divorce her if she doesn’t come back home. (Wha….?)

Rhonda wants to know why Jen refuses to color with paints or magic markers. Jen has an aversion to dirt and they discuss the imaginary rubber gloves she wears all the time. (ooh, that reminds me of a funny scene from Animal House!) Rhonda gives Jen an assignment to be “the Fun Queen” and will lead the group to a fun night out. She gives Jen a slip of paper with the destination on it, which is to be a secret. “Some of us are gonna have a hard time with it,” predicts Jen.

Towanda is on the phone with her father. (Apparently she can’t even stand to speak directly to him, because she is reading her assignment to him from a pad of paper. She does take care to emphasize the word “honestly” as though she wants him to know she is already expecting him to lie.) She asked if she was a planned child. Michael laughs at the very idea. She asks him what his worries were about having children, and he says he was concerned about providing a good home. About labor and delivery he says he was always afraid because men weren’t allowed “back there” and he never knew if his wife would live or die. He tells her she was a mean child. His memories are mostly of his daughters as a group, not individuals. He tells her they were always “My queens”.

Sommer is happy to be going to a gym to escape the tension in the house. She meets Marcus the trainer, and they go over her health history. Marcus narrates that Sommer might believe she can eat anything just because the quantity is restricted. Sommer tells him she doesn’t want to be “the skinny fat.” She wants muscle definition.

Jennifer is asking Rhonda to let her take the necklace of cards off. Rhonda says it will take a change of heart and a change of resistance to get it off. Jennifer whines that she hasn’t complained in 2 weeks (unless you count the times she DID) and that it’s not fair Kim got a reprieve and she can’t. Rhonda narrates that Jen sees Iyanla’s leniency with Kim as a reflection of her own mother and sister. Jen yells that maybe she needs to start throwing tantrums too. Rhonda wants Jen to get so pissed off at things that are not fair, that she will make the difference herself.

Marcus says Sommer has good goals and they will focus on inches and energy, not poundage. He has her do posture exercises on a ball and she is having trouble looking in a mirror because it reminds her how far she still has to go.

The women all meet with Dr. Katz. Josie is complaining that things that have already been let go are being brought up again. Dr. Stan agrees it isn’t about makeup so much as trust, self-esteem and confrontation. They discuss the process and how people can be told to stay in their own world, but sometimes worlds collide. Josie admits she lashed out at Kim from anger. Doctor Stan reminds Josie and the others that any discussion will blow up if you can’t stay on topic and refrain from consulting others. He ends the session with the admonishment “no more makeup.” (Way to belittle someone’s issues, sexist jerk)

Jen is having fun teasing the others about where they might go that night. They think it’s camping. She tells Kim she can’t bring “Louis” (her Vuitton bag). Jen narrates that Towanda is already sad, and that nobody’s going to be really happy about where they are going. It turns out to be Turbo track, and they are all happy about it except Towanda who is openly brooding. They are going to do the one where you get to drag race in giant slot-cars. Sinae asks the attendant for tips so she can “whoop on them.” In the end she does win and they all, except Towanda, shout “You won, Nay Nay!” (I wonder if her nickname is “Sha Nay Nay”?)

Back home, Towanda tells Kim she is really stressed, that her husband has issued an ultimatum and she will be waiting for him to calm down. She narrates that this is the lowest time ever in her life. (What is she up to??)

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