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Anything But The Cheez Doodles – Starting Over, 10/7/04

10/7/04

It’s Morning. Jen is commenting that Kim has not smiled or laughed since her daughters arrived. Then we see Kim on her bed with her face behind a book or clipboard or something, and one of her daughters sitting with her and trowelling on makeup. We get a close-up shot of the sparkly pink plastic sandals on Kim’s feet. Kim narrates that she was not expecting her children to have to witness the process of the house and participate with the Life Coaches and the shrink. In group without them, Rhonda asks Kim why she is off by herself and Kim responds that she didn’t think she was, but she does feel distracted. She tells Rhonda the visit has been harsh for her daughters. Rhonda wonders what’s wrong with that. Kim admits that she feels closer to them now that they have seen her vulnerable. Rhonda asks the rest of the group for observations and they keep quiet. Rhonda and Kim talk a bit about how isolation is comforting sometimes and Rhonda asks the group how they comfort themselves when attacked, because when you can identify an unhealthy response, you can change it. Today’s topic will be food because that’s how some people comfort themselves. She wants to know how each person uses food and they all lie and say it’s for energy or whatever. They’re a little more real about what one food they would want on a desert island, except Towanda who would want an apple because it cleans your teeth. This discussion is an excellent opportunity to pile on Sommer once again. It starts slowly, with Jen going around the room and telling everyone what’s wrong with their eating habits. It keeps coming back to Sommer, who eats cheez puffs and fast food because it’s inconvenient to go into town for groceries. Rhonda quizzes her about why she will spend 25K on surgery but not 20 bucks on a taxi to go get real food. Rhonda narrates that Sommer has put herself through dangerous surgery but won’t eat right or exercise to complete the process. She wants the group to think about what and why people eat, and what that can tell you about a person. She dismisses them and then tells them there will be a Board of Review later that day.

For newcomers, Board of Review is where they all sit around a big table and two people get called to the podium to defend their progress in the house and receive a grade. A grade of A means you are right on track. B means you need to work harder. C means you’re on probation. Two C’s, and you’ll be asked to leave. An F means you have to leave right now. Someone could graduate, someone could be asked to leave.

Josie narrates that Kim is the number one person who might be asked to leave, and Kim narrates that she hopes she will not be called to the podium.

We see come of the women talking about Kim’s behavior. Then cut to Kim telling her children she is surprised things have been so harsh in the house while they are there.

Rhonda and Sommer are getting ready for the doctor. Rhonda wants to know how she felt when deciding to have gastric bypass surgery and Sommer says it was hard to admit to being morbidly obese. She thinks she may have gained weight since being in the house. She also has blamed all the pain in her life, except for the deaths, on her body. Rhonda narrates that some bypass patients have dies from not taking care of themselves. (I really couldn’t find anything on that. I think the greatest risk is just getting fat again. ) Rhonda tells Sommer she recently lost two dress sizes and when she journaled her food, she was surprised at how the carbs and desserts can creep back in, even for someone not clinically obese. They marvel at what a big year it is for Sommer, getting physically fit and coming to the house for emotional work too.

Towanda meets with Iyanla and narrates she can tell she’s going up for review this day.

Then we see Iyanla meeting with Kim and the daughters. Kim tells Iyanla she has felt attacked and used while her daughters have been there and wants Iyanla to “just look at that.” Iyanla turns is back to Kim and says Kim’s “filters” are seeing theiur usual discuss as attacks just because the girls are there. Kim is trying to grasp the concept.

Sommer is in the doctor’s office. She has lost half a pound for a total of 76 pounds in four months. She narrates it’s not enough for her.

It’s not enough for the housemates either, and they are talking about it at home. They are tut-tutting about Sommer’s food choices. Jennifer announces she has decided it’s not her place to talk about it – then proceeds to do just that.

Iyanla and Kim are still exploring the “filter” problem. Iyanla tells her it’s a habit to feel attacked, and she will help Kim find the cause and replace it. Kim is unconvinced but admits it happens all the time so there must be something to it. Kim tels Iyanla she asked her roommates if the makeup looked lighter than usual and they all assured her it did. Iyanla says if it had been her, she would have asked why Kim needed to have makeup on for her daughters’ visit. Why can’t they see you without it? The girls remind Iyanla Kim wears no makeup in the house at home, so what’s the big deal? (Come on, we all know it’s because these 3 princesses have decided they need to look just so for the Hollywood cameras and for shopping on Melrose, in case the neighbors are watching!) Iyanla reminds Kim that ” I want for you joyful living, andwhat got you here will not get you there.” Kim wants to know what she is supposed to wear from now on and Iyanla tells her to make a choice.

The doctor is asking Sommer about her diet. She tells him she eats a lot of meat and dairy and protein bars, and that she eats chips “every once in a while.” He asks her to stay away from carbs and she responds, “well, I like them so I am going to eat them.” He asks her to substitute pretzels for chips and she says she doesn’t like pretzels. The doctor narrates that Sommer could gain back all her weight if she doesn’t use this first year to modify her behaviors.

Back at the house, Jen and Josie are talking about the Board of Review. Josie says she is always prepared to be called to the podium.

Kim, getting ready to say goodbye to her daughters, tells them she thinks Josie might graduate. Then the subject is the girls leaving and Kim cries. They hold her and stroke her hair. Later she narrates that she hopes the will know now that they can support her the way she does them. I wasn’t taping, but I am sure that when they left, they said “Goodbye, Kim.”

Now the focus is on the Board of Review. Sinae narrates it’s like a parent-teacher conference when you have just gotten in trouble. Jennifer narrates that she does not want to be reviewed. Kim narrates that Iyanla and Rhonda look mean coming into the room.

Sommer is called first. She says her biggest fault is defensiveness. She gives herself a B We go around the table and everyone gets to say something. Kim is upset that Sommer went public with the makeup incident without talking to her privately first. Jen tells her she’s not putting much effort into losing weight. Josie tells her the extreme work is over and now it’s time to get busy with the smaller pieces. (Did she like, GAIN I.Q. by having a baby????) Iyanla says she should surrender the need to fit in, just be yourself and you will. (yeah, that worked so well on the first day) Next they all get to say whether she should stay or go. (We learned in season one that this is not the same as voting.) They all say she should stay. Rhonda says she should stay and learn to make small decisions every day to get disciplined. They ask if she can think of any times when she showed her true self in the house and she starts collecting tears on her fingers for inspection. She says that in the makeup incident, she didn’t confront Kim privately because she didn’t feel she could do it on her own. She apologizes and Kim narrates it’s a fake just to be able to stay in the house. She gets a B and is told she needs to be more honest.

Kim is sweating but it’s Towanda who’s called next. She says she does well by getting along with everyone. She knows she needs to work on vulnerability. She sees it as a sign of weakness that could leave openings for others to hurt her. She gives herself a B for realizing it was herself she did not trust, rather than Iyanla. She knows she’s a control freak, even trying to control her own feelings, and she feels the trust incident was the first time she was honest with herself. She is asked to list 3 things she has done in the house that have had meaning, and she says number one, she knows it’s ok to cry and show emotions. Then she cries and the show ends with Iyanla looking puzzled.

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