We’re on outdoor lockdown now, after an eventful margarita party. Mostly everyone is sitting around the fire pit, while Matt, Adam, Ryan, and Natalie play pool. Most of the group seems to think that they should have opted for the grill over the party.
Small talk about products that are made in Mexico, where Allison’s brother works, and line dancing.
The girls start talking about what they like to do sexually. Amanda apparently is a big fan of the blow job, while Sheila claims to love it all. When she’s asked if she likes anal, she says she doesn’t want to discuss this on TV. Sure, she can take a pass, but I still have to write about it.
Amanda says that she had a dream that Sheila and Adam had sex. Sheila is repulsed. Apparently tomorrow is the day that the girls have to wear their bathing suits all day, and Sheila isn’t happy about this either. Someone asks Natalie if she’s going to wear her thong bikini tomorrow, and she says no because it doesn’t have a top. Should we go there? Nah, too easy.
The pool players are equally boring. It starts to hail outside, which amazes James and Chelsia. The hail is short-lived, however, and it’s back to mundane conversation shortly.
The lockdown is over now, and most of the hamsters head inside. The food is still out, so at least they’ve got that going for them.
Back outside, Natalie tries to get a hug from her Matty, but he refuses her. They start to argue over a comment that Matt made earlier, when he said that he didn’t like “outgoing girls.” Natalie is offended by this, and is also upset that she tries to joke around with him and he “takes her serious.” Matt tries to explain that he meant he doesn’t like â€¦ no wait, wasn’t attracted to â€¦ no wait, doesn’t want to have a girlfriend who is outgoing. Yeah, that’s the ticket. But he loves Natalie’s personality. In fact, he thinks she has the best personality in the house. Natalie isn’t buying this, and continues to alternately shout at him and laugh nervously.
Then Natalie is mad because she tries “ball-busting” and making jokes about Matt, and he takes her too seriously. Oh, and she doesn’t understand why he doesn’t like that she shows her body off, like getting a tattoo on her bare ass, when he can go ahead and moon the others and think nothing of it. He says that she can do what she wants to do, but he wouldn’t want his girlfriend to act that way. But he loves Natalie and wants to hang out with her after the show.
Natalie keeps saying the same things over and over. She’s right, to a point, but she’s not very good at getting her point across without getting overly emotional. Matt’s just a complete jerk, but it’s very obvious that he’s got a lot of experience fighting with emotional women. He tells her she’s right, he’s wrong, and he’s sorry. James says that he loves both of them and doesn’t want this to be a huge deal. It’s not worth the drama.
Apparently Natalie disagrees with James, as she ends up running into the house in a huff. Matt tells the guys that this is exactly why he can’t come out and say, “You like me, but I just don’t like you that way.” No Matt, this is exactly why you should say that. She’ll get over it, trust me.
Natalie goes to one of the bedrooms and talks with Amanda, Sharon, and Allison. Eventually Chelsia joins them as well. Natalie says that she can’t believe BB put her with him, after she’s been single and lonely for nine months. Honey, being single for nine months is NOT a hardship! No one needs a man (or a woman, for that matter) that badly. Nine months is nothing.
Natalie explains the whole situation, with Matt saying that he doesn’t like outgoing girls, and the bare ass thing, and how he can’t handle her “ball-busting.” She’s also upset that he’s mean to her and doesn’t spend any time with her when she’s supposed to be his partner. Any time she tries to talk to him or hug him, he brushes her off. The girls give her a lot of support, and this conversation goes on for ages.
Natalie then says that Matt kissed her on Valentine’s Day and wanted more from her, but she said no. Oh dear. Nat? The feeds caught your version of “no,” and it’s a little different than you’re portraying here. I’m just sayin’.
The women decide that Natalie should go back out there and tell Matt that if he can’t find the time to talk to her and treat her with respect, then he shouldn’t ever try to kiss her again. And then she should just walk back into the house and be done with it. That way, the guys will know that it isn’t all one-sided because Matt has kissed her before, and he’ll have no choice but to be nicer to her. She obviously doesn’t really want to do this, but they talk her into it. She leaves the bedroom with the other girls right behind her.
Oops, too late. Matt is in the living room looking for Natalie so he can apologize. Natalie says she wants to talk to him right now, in front of everyone. Matt wants it to be private. I’ll bet he does. They start yelling at each other, and Natalie comes out with this gem: “Quit making everyone think that I’m chasing your nut sack, ’cause I’m not!” She repeats the “nut sack” thing several times for emphasis.
Matt goes into full-on showman mode. He tells Natalie that he doesn’t want to be romantically involved with anyone, and he really doesn’t want to be with someone who puts tattoos on their boobs. He apologizes, but says that’s how he feels. He completely takes over the conversation, telling Natalie he needs five minutes to talk and then she gets her turn.
Matt admits to kissing Natalie, and also to flirting with the rest of the women in the house. He also says that he’s physically attracted to Nat, and he’d “f*ck (her) right now in front of everybody.” He just doesn’t like her like a girlfriend. Natalie keeps insisting that he’s mean to her and doesn’t treat her as well as he treats everyone else in the house. He tries to say that he does, then apologizes because he doesn’t, and it’s all a big circular argument with neither of them really listening to each other. Matt hands out the BS, and Natalie can’t let go of the things that are bothering her.
Everyone else, except for Sheila who was called to the DR, is sitting on the round couches watching this all unfold. Matt talks and talks, all animated and trying to entertain everyone. Natalie finally tells him that it’s her turn to speak, that she should get her five minutes. He agrees, but then interrupts her every time she tries to say something. Joshuah jumps in and says that the rest of them think that Natalie is a “delicate flower” and are dismayed that she has to come to all of them for support because her partner isn’t giving her any. Natalie thanks him, although I’m not sure the “delicate flower” bit was really a compliment.
The argument continues – we’re going on half an hour now – and Matt says again, “You’re right. I’m wrong. You win.” Except that he’s not even making his fake statement to Natalie, he’s addressing his audience. He tries to give her a hug, but she says no. Eventually she does hug him, and he tries to walk away, arms wide open, saying that it’s done now and they don’t need to talk anymore. James jumps in and tells him that this was ridiculous, that he was trying to put on a good show for the rest of them and the Showtime viewers, when he just needs to “be chill” and talk to her like a grown up. Or, as Parker would say, a “grown-ass man.”
Matt tries to counter that this is just the way he is, and that it’s because he’s from Boston. That makes him loud and animated. I didn’t realize that Boston makes its men into assholes. Way to represent, Matty. Allison jumps in and agrees, saying that all guys from Boston are like that. Men of Boston, I implore you, prove these two wrong! You can’t all be like that, surely.
45 minutes after the argument started, Matt agrees to go and talk to Natalie privately to make sure everything is okay. The private argument is an awful lot like the public one was, except that Matt tells her that the other girls say stuff to her about him because they want to break her down, since she’s the strongest girl in the house. Someone bring in the shovels, it’s going to be a busy night. Natalie tells him that they can’t break her down because he’s already done it himself.
In the living room, the rest of the hamsters talk about the fight, and decide that Natalie likes Matt and believes they might actually be soul mates, while Matt isn’t interested but doesn’t want to come out and tell her. Instead, he’s mean to her and hopes that she’ll take the hint or get so mad at him that she won’t be interested any more.
Sheila comes out of the diary room, and everyone claps. She missed the whole thing. Lucky girl. Allison and Chelsia start play-wrestling, trying to take each others’ clothes off. The boys are enjoying the action. Joshuah, who had gone to listen to Mattalie fight but soon got bored, suggests that Chelsia and Allison should ice up each others’ nipples. And he’s the gay guy in the house.
Back to Mattalie. Matt is trying to explain that the way Natalie “busts his balls” makes everyone else think she likes him. She makes references to wanting to cuddle with him but he turns her down, or says that he doesn’t try anything in bed with her. She insists that this is how she jokes with him, and he’s trying to make her see how it looks to others. I truly hate to admit this, but he’s right on this point.
Then he tells her that he had a relationship before coming into the house, and that he was supposed to move into this girl’s house but he had to leave for BB and didn’t have time to call her beforehand. That’s baloney. I don’t care if BB was telling him to hurry the hell up and leave immediately, he could have picked up the phone and said, “Something urgent has come up – you’ll understand in a few days.”
Allison and Chelsia are wrestling again, and Allison gets most of Chelsia’s clothes off this time. Once again, the guys are loving it. I’ll bet Matt will be pissed that he missed it.
Back to the bedroom, where not Matt and Natalie are whispering. Sounds like they’re talking about strategy. Matt says that she should go to Joshuah and make up a sob story about how badly she needs to win the money. She balks at the idea, but Matt insists that he’ll buy it because he’s gay. “Gays are equivalent to women,” he says. I wonder if I can will Natalie to slap him from here.
Finally Matt and Natalie join the others, and the hamsters applaud. They don’t have much time left to eat (well, Amanda and Alex, and Sheila and Adam, anyway) before the slop restriction is back on, so there’s a lot of ice cream being consumed. Natalie wanders off somewhere, and Matt is telling Amanda that Nat gives him blow jobs and he doesn’t even have to do anything. Ugh.
Matt goes to the bathroom, where Allison and Sharon tell him about the wrestling. He’s big-time flirting with them, and I really just would rather not watch this. He’s just a vile human being. Allison promises that she has his back in the game. Oh really?
Matt goes to the kitchen, where the discussion is about Dick and Daniele from last season and how well they played the game. Matt says that he would have punched Dick, or started a fight and got him thrown out of the game. He says he would never put up with someone like that. Riiiight.
Natalie gets ready to wash off her boob tattoos (boobtoos?) but decides to let Alex and Joshuah have a peak first. A bunch of hamsters have gone to bed, but most of them are still awake and talking.
Adam is doing something with his hands in his pants – no idea what’s going on here, but Chelsia and Amanda saw it and they run to the kitchen and hide under the table. Adam comes in and grabs some food, and the girls jump out at him and give him hell for not washing his hands. He grabs Chelsia’s face. Yuck.
Random houseguest concern: When they get out of the house and become famous, Parker will be stalking them and taking their pictures. Sigh.
It starts raining heavily outside, and Alex decides to run out there and play basketball in the rain. The weather is probably the most interesting part of this season. It’s the coldest one yet, but we’ve already seen more skin than all the rest of the BB seasons combined. I like the goofy stuff though, like Alex playing in the rain. Or the made up golf games last season. That’s the fun part of getting the feeds – seeing the hamsters goof off when they don’t really care about the cameras, they’re just trying to enjoy themselves.
Now it’s time for people to get ready for bed. There are lots of conversations going on, but they’re either rehash of stuff we’ve heard before, or just not interesting enough to detail. Chelsia and James end up kissing and cuddling in bed together again, while watching the spy screen. How romantic.
Adam is with Matt and Natalie in the kitchen. He tells them that they’re on the block because of their vote to keep Parker and Jen last week. Then he bitches about Chelsia and Amanda watching to see if he washed his hands, and says that he hates everyone in the house. Matt sends Natalie away and says he wants to talk to Adam alone outside. Here we go again.
Matt basically wants Adam to guarantee his vote, which he does, and asks him to talk to Allison and Ryan to make sure that Operation Condor is still in effect. Adam is twitching and picking at his face a lot. Then he refers to Josh as the “fa**ot” and I can’t even listen to him any more. If there was a god and he cared about reality TV at all, he’d send a lightning bolt down to take care of these two in one swoop.
Oh good, now we get to listen to Sheila tell whoever will listen that the DR won’t give her any Tylenol PM tonight. Amanda changes the subject and says that she thinks the ratings for this season will be great because they’re a more interesting cast than any before them. Hate to burst your bubble there Amanda, but no. No on all counts.
James and Chelsia talk for a while, make out for a while, and then talk some more. Adam gets up, and so does Ryan. They go outside for a smoke, discuss Operation Condor, and Adam grabs a snack in the kitchen. They go back to bed, and it looks like everyone’s sleeping now. Thank goodness.
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