When we come back from the nomination ceremony, Amanda and Matt are sitting together talking. Amanda says that Alex thinks they’re on the block because of her. Well yeah. Matt thinks that, it Amanda and Alex win the veto, he and Natalie are going home. Amanda doesn’t think so – or at least that’s what she says to make Matt feel better. Matt says he’s not going to “suck dicks” for votes. Which gives me a nice little segue into â€¦
Natalie and Sharon are in the spa room. Natalie wants to make sure that Alex and Amanda don’t win the veto. Interesting that she and Matt are both having basically the same conversation, but in different rooms with different people. Oh, this one’s a bit different now, because Natalie thinks things would have been better if Parker had stayed in the house. How? I have no idea.
Matt goes outside and says that he will f*ck for votes. He also offers to walk around with his dick hanging out for votes. This guy is vile. He really is. But I wonder if there’s something Freudian in the way he isn’t willing to “suck dicks” but he’ll do anything else. Also, I can’t believe I’m putting this much thought into anything he says, especially something like that. Moving on.
Adam tells Matt that it’s all good, he’s not going home this week. Matt replies that he said the same thing to Parker. Heh. Natalie comes along and tells Matt that they really need to spend some time together this week. He says okay, but you just know that the only time Matt wants to spend Nat is horizontal.
Adam, Matt, Ryan, and Alex discuss the situation at hand – the nominations. Adam’s acting like he’s outraged or something, which is ridiculous. Then again, it’s Adam, so no one should be surprised. They spend some time trying to figure out when the veto comp will be, and then when evictions are. There was an eviction friggin’ yesterday, guys. They’re a week apart. I know you can do the math. Can’t you?
Allison is washing clothes by hand with a bucket and washboard. The rest of them? Are all standing around watching like it’s a demonstration at the Early Settlers Museum.
Amanda and Alex talk, and Alex says that it’s obviously the two of them that James and Chelsia want out and America must think that he and Amanda are idiots. I don’t know about “America,” but I’m not their biggest fan. Alex thinks that they should have targeted James and Chelsia instead of Parker and Jen last week.
Now it’s time for idle chatter. Let’s see. Alex says that if he won a phone call from home, he’d give it to Sheila because she has a son. Adam is going on and on about how hard this week is going to be without real food. Natalie tells James that she’s not angry with him about being nominated – she understands.
Sheila tells Amanda and Matt that Allison has been acting much differently since Jen and Parker were evicted, because she’s not in danger any longer. Amanda smells opportunity, and tells Sheila that if she plays for and wins the veto, and then uses it to save her and Alex, then she and Alex and Matt and Natalie will take her and Adam to the final three. As if Amanda’s going to get there.
Alex and Matt are talking about the “fake lesbians” and decide, just like James did, that they have to watch the two of them together to see what’s really going on there.
Adam, James, and Ryan are talking about “Operation Condor” again. They’re laughing at Matt for not using the veto last week, and bet that he wishes he had now. These three go upstairs to talk with Chelsia, Amanda, and Sharon, who are all hanging out in the HoH room. The discussion is mostly about Sheila’s yeast infection.
Somehow the conversation turns to Adam and how he has diamonds instead of cash. He brags about the jeweled phone, watch, and other assorted items he has. And now the rest of the hamsters can decide that Adam shouldn’t win because he already has money. Smart move, Adam. Personally I think Adam shouldn’t win because he’s a tool.
As if to prove my point, he goes on to say that he used to work as a pimp, but doesn’t mind admitting that because the statute of limitations is up on that gig. Now he’s redeeming himself by working with kids, but finds it incredibly boring. Not to worry, Adumb. I’m pretty sure no one is going to let their kid within 50 feet of you after this show is over.
Natalie has decided that she’s not going to worry about being nominated. She feels lucky to have been picked to be on the show, and figures that she’ll try her hardest for the veto, and if it doesn’t work out for her that’s okay. That’s the spirit!
Amanda complains that she’s hypoglycemic, so she should be able to eat some bread while she’s on slop. I wonder if she’s even checked the ingredients in the slop. She thinks that BB will give her sugar pills for the week.
James and Chelsia decide to take a nap, so they kick everyone else out of the room. Joshuah and Sharon head for bed as well. It’s only 9:30, so I’m thinking it might be a late night if they’re all having naps now.
Allison tells a story about Jen saying that her boyfriend was military and in Iraq, and not happy about her doing the show. I guess this was before the “big secret” came out. She thinks that they should all be offended that Jen made up a lie about someone fighting in Iraq.
Sheila, Allison, and Ryan discuss Jen, and Ryan wants to know if she’s really that bad. Both girls tell him that she is. Meanwhile, Adam is looking at the memory wall and saying that Jen’s picture is first, so she’s going to win – then he laughs. Ryan says that he can understand why other people don’t like Jen very much. Allison says that it was hard to hate her so much while she was still trying to be a good partner to Ryan. But now I guess the floodgates are open.
Sheila leaves, and Allison and Ryan are going to bed. Allison tells him that she feels bad saying stuff about Jen, so the only thing she’s going to say now is that she thinks he deserves much better than her. He seems surprised to hear this. He says that Allison has opened his eyes to some things about Jen. Allison goes on and on about how Jen says things without thinking and it was all about her and that she couldn’t separate real life from the game.
Amanda is in bed by herself, crying and praying out loud for god to let her win the veto. And there we go, the BB trifecta is complete. We’ve had the “good people should win” thing, the “all we have to do is win every HoH or PoV” thing, and now we have the “if I just pray hard enough, god will help me out” thing. One more time for those who still don’t understand this: god does not care who wins a reality show. If he’s actually up there, one would hope that he has more important things to worry about.
Alex, Matt, and Adam somehow convince Natalie to do a striptease for them. She agrees, if Matt will cuddle with her for two minutes afterwards. He says that he’ll cuddle with her until he falls asleep tonight, so the peep show is a go. Oh boy. Natalie says that she won’t strip down to nothing though.
They all head to the spa room, with Amanda tagging along behind because she’s obviously not happy that someone else is getting attention. Chelsia and Sheila arrive as well, and the guys complain that having girls in the audience ruins everything. Natalie enters wearing a goofy red wig. She does her striptease, which includes a lot of rubbing and wiggling her ass in front of the guys. She dances on the table, and Chelsia tries to take her bra off. The guys are hooting and hollering, and Adam thinks this is the best thing to ever hit CBS.
When the show is over, there’s some debate over whether or not this will be shown on TV. Matt tells the camera that he hopes someone out there is watching this and jerking off to it. Klassy. Amanda has run out of the room after Alex asked if she was a virgin.
Adam, Alex, and Matt head outside. Alex and Matt are trying to convince Adam to use the veto if he wins it, and try to get Ryan and Allison nominated. They tell him that Sheila isn’t trustworthy and he has to be careful with her. Adam doesn’t make any commitments at all. Matt complains that now he has to cuddle with “that bitch.” I can’t decide who I want to see evicted more, Amanda or this jerk.
Alex goes inside to bed. Amanda is there, and he asks her again if she’s a virgin. She changes the subject, and says that she would eat poop to win the veto. She asks him if he would, and he wonders if she means her poop. Good grief. Then she asks him if he’d drink her pee to win the veto. What the hell is wrong with these people?
Alex asks again if she’s a virgin, and says “that’s just great.” He thinks if she actually is a virgin, then she’s the biggest tease ever, walking around dressed like she does. Alex doesn’t get out much, does he? He keeps asking, and she tells him “Ask me twice.” He does, and she answers no to the first one, and yes to the second. Then tells him to decide. Heh. He gets really intense, calling her all kinds of names, and tells her that she walks around with her tits hanging out but she’s a virgin. He asks if she thinks about having sex, and she says, “every day.” Then he laughs at her, saying that she doesn’t even know what it feels like.
Amanda is oddly alternating between being silent and talking to him in her baby voice. Very weird. Alex calls her some more names, and then she asks him to play with her hair. Again, what the hell? He refuses and says it stinks, and then rolls over like he’s going to sleep.
James and Chelsia are fooling around in the HoH room. I’m assuming they’re sober this evening. Then talk goes strategic, and they decide that they want to shake up the game a little bit. Not sure why, but let’s see where this goes. They want to win the veto, make a deal with Alex and Amanda, and then put Joshuah and Sharon or Ryan and Allison on the block, then swing the votes so that Matt and Natalie leave. They’re giddy with this plan, because then no one will be mad at them after this week, and they might not go up next week. Again, making plans without knowing who’s going to win the veto is not smart. But they’re really excited about all of this working.
Alex and Amanda, who I thought were sleeping, apparently aren’t. Alex sits up suddenly and whisper-shouts at Amanda to “stop!” She wants to know what the hell he’s talking about, and he says that she was shaking the bed. She denies this, and he tells her to shut up, never mind, and everything is okay now.
Everyone seems to be asleep soon after. James gets up, goes to the sauna by himself, and chews on his toenails. Gross. He walks around the house for a bit and then heads back upstairs. And that seems to be that for the day. All hamsters are sleeping soundly, dreaming about winning the veto, eating something other than slop and pickles, and finally knowing what the house would be like without Matt in it.
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