After dinner, the hamsters scatter. A few are cleaning up the kitchen, others are chatting in the bathroom, and still others are playing pool. At the pool table, Alex wonders if every HoH will get two weeks in power. Oh dear god no. Can you imagine? Amanda thinks that it will be a short season because of things she heard before going into the house.
Flames, of course.
Natalie talks to Sharon about how she thinks Amanda is spreading rumours. She plans to go to Allison and apologize for being angry (does Allison even know that Nat was upset?) and tell her that she really likes her. She leaves and talks to Allison, who says that she appreciates it. And that’s that.
Sharon and Joshuah are giddily planning the upset in evicting Parker and Jen. They think that this will go down as a huge moment in BB history, and will mark the real start of the game. Please people, it’s not that big a deal. Sharon wants to tell Amanda that Jen and Parker might go this week, just so that she doesn’t wig out too much when it happens. Dumb idea – you can’t pull off a “shocking” eviction when everyone knows about it.
Jen and Parker decide that they should try and convince Natalie to use the veto on them, because apparently they think that Matt wants to. Jen says that Natalie is easy to sway, so they just need to work on her a little.
Amanda and Alex head for the hammock, where Amanda apologizes for throwing the veto comp. She says that winning it would have made them a bigger threat. She also apologizes for telling everyone about what happened last night, and says that she just wanted to take things slowly. Alex doesn’t understand this, because she walks around in skimpy clothing and then tells everyone what a good girl she is. Amanda mentions that Parker is bugging her, so Alex offers to get rid of him this week. She says no, Allison hates her and needs to go.
These two seem to have made up now. They talk about Allison, and how she smokes pot. Amanda and Alex are the only ones in the house who haven’t tried drugs, and Alex calls the rest of them a bunch of crackheads. Exaggerate much? Amanda says that “someone” has been spreading rumours about Natalie wanting a relationship with Matt. Gah. They gossip about how many men Joshuah has slept with, and how he’s spread STD’s. Nice.
Meanwhile, Chelsia, James, promiscuous Joshuah, and Sharon are talking about how they think there’s still another twist to come, with another two people in the house having an existing relationship. Paranoia is so much fun.
Most of the group sits around talking about sex, drugs, and more sex. They’re waiting for the Showtime feeds to start, and planning what games they’re going to play and stuff at 9pm. I really wish BB would have told them that Showtime wasn’t happening this season, because I hate that they act differently for three hours every day trying to show off, and then become instantly boring for the rest of the time.
Sheila and Allison are talking about how juvenile everyone else is, and that they bonded together because they’re both smart and don’t act like they’re at camp. True, that. Although I’d add James and Chelsia to the “normal people club,” at least for now. Sheila wouldn’t agree with me, however, because she’s now ranting that James called someone “fat” and that’s how anorexia and bulimia get started. She’s planning to call him out for his rudeness.
Half an hour into the Showtime hour, the alcohol is brought out. Sheila and Allison go to the bathroom to chat. The rest of the hamsters are drinking and yapping about nothing in particular. Natalie admits that she had an abortion when she was 19. She was on birth control and got pregnant anyway, and she knows in her heart that she made the right decision. You know, I think I like Natalie. I feel sorry for her because she’s not really that bright and people take advantage of her, but she’s pretty real. Clueless, but real.
There’s a small group in the spa room now. James, Chelsia, Sharon, and Adam. In the kitchen Natalie is offering to teach people her stripper moves and/or give them lap dances. Which she wouldn’t do if Showtime wasn’t on, I imagine. She goes to the staircase and starts jiggling and rubbing her boobs on the railing. Nice. Joshuah joins her, and this is pretty funny. He’s really into it, and they actually look cute together. Well, cute in an X-rated sort of way.
Wow, Sheila is telling Allison a bit of her life story. Her dad robbed a bank when she was two years old, and they found his fingerprints on the getaway car. He went to prison, and her mom didn’t have the money to raise her and her brother, so they were sent to an orphanage and eventually separated. I have to admit, if she’s in the house to garner interest in the autobiography she’s writing, it’s working. Her mom had another baby after that, and gave her up as well.
Natalie has moved onto pole dancing now. She’s pretty goofy, that one. But fun. Alex is holding the pole from the weights so she can perform. The guys are captivated, but Amanda doesn’t look impressed. She does ask Natalie to teach her how to pole dance later though. Go figure.
Alex joins the girls in the bathroom, and Sheila asks him about the groping incident. He admits that he tried, but Amanda said no so that’s that. He changes the subject and asks Allison why she doesn’t come out and talk with everyone else. She says that she prefers to have one-on-one conversations. And we all know how well that worked out for Kail last season, don’t we?
Alex leaves. Allison says that James told her that he used to be a con artist and a prostitute and scammed people for loads of money, which he used to buy drugs with. Where does Robyn Kass find these people?
Someone puts bubbles in the hot tub, and everyone except Allison, Matt, Adam, and Sheila end up in there. Natalie thinks they should all get naked, since the bubbles will block the view anyway. And â€¦ she does. Chelsia takes her bottoms off for some reason. I think James is nude as well. Joshuah wants to touch Nat’s boobs, and when he does he proclaims that they’re “squishy.” As opposed to â€¦ ? This all sounds quite risquÃ© and sexy, I know, but it’s just not. It’s odd.
Natalie is begging the rest of them to take their clothes off, but no one’s biting. James admits that he doesn’t shave, uh, down there. He talks about being a male stripper in a gay club. And then he gets out of the hot tub, completely nude, and starts shaking his junk around. It must be time to switch feeds by now, but it appears that all four are on this backyard action. Oh wait, there’s Sheila and Adam. Let’s go see what they’re doing.
They’re with Allison and Matt, talking about sex and women. Darnit. Not very interesting at all. Showtime is over for the night, so the hot tub crew clears out. More people come in join Sheila, Adam, Allison, and Matt. Parker is there, saying that he’s glad that he didn’t get paired with Amanda because he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands to himself at night either. Why do all the guys think Amanda is that hot? Is she actually that hot? I’m seriously curious.
Outside, James is telling everyone that he can perform fellatio on himself. Seriously. The guys don’t look impressed, but Chelsia wants him to bend over so she can see for herself. And then she screams, “Oh my god! He can!” Well that’s far more information than I ever wanted to know about Crazy James. And I’m opting to rescind my opinion of his being “normal.”
Here’s some weirdness. Amanda, Parker, and Matt are hanging out in one of the bedrooms. Parker and Amanda are all cuddly with each other, but concerned that Alex might be watching them on the spy cam. So they decide to call Natalie in and send her upstairs to talk to Alex and distract him. She does, and Matt says that it’s so great that he’s got a puppy dog in the house. Man, I hate him.
Nat goes upstairs and says that it’s too noisy downstairs, can she come in and stay with him for a while? He invites her in, and they talk about how they’re not happy with their game partners. Amanda comes up and opens the door, looks inside, and says, “oops, sorry!” and leaves.
Alex rushes out and catches her on the stairs, and tells her not to even think that there’s anything going on with him and Natalie. Well Amanda knows that, because she sent Nat up there in the first place. But she plays coy about it and goes into the kitchen. Then she goes back upstairs, where Natalie has vacated the room, and Alex calls her an idiot if she thinks anything was going on up there. Amanda still plays dumb and tells him that he’s mean. She leaves again.
Alex puts on his sweats and goes back downstairs, telling Amanda that anything he felt for her before is over now. He goes outside and tells her that she can have the room. She follows him and says that he can’t sleep outside. Oh, the drama. Meanwhile, Ryan and Jen are talking about how immature Amanda is. No kidding.
Oh, guess what? Matt’s getting more action from Natalie in bed. Same audio as last time. Sigh.
Amanda goes upstairs, but hides on the floor in the hallway as Alex comes in to talk to Parker in the kitchen. Alex calls Amanda crazy, and worries that she’s going to completely throw his game. He says that she starts something every single night and can’t keep her mouth shut. Alex would rather mess around with Sheila than Natalie, and can’t believe Amanda would jump to conclusions like that. Then he tells Parker that he read on the “blogs” before going into the house that there would be a tranny in the house, and he thinks it’s Natalie. Ha!
Matt comes out and joins the boys, telling them that he just got a blow job from Nat and didn’t even have to kiss her. I’d love to see someone punch this guy in the face. Just once. Alex tells him that he needs to spend some time with Natalie, actually talking to her, because that’s all she wants from him. Alex’s stock goes up a few points. Amanda is still listening in from upstairs, so we can expect this Matt/Nat info to be all over the house tomorrow.
It seems that everyone else has gone to sleep. It’s almost four in the morning, after all. Amanda looks like she’s fallen asleep on the couch in the hallway upstairs. The boys go on and on about how they’re the starts of “the show” and everyone else is just there to take up space. They talk more about Natalie servicing Matt and how awesome it is. Eventually they get tired of patting themselves on the back and go to bed. Alex wakes Amanda up, and they end up sleeping in the HoH room together, as usual.
Is it just me, or is the house basically full of pigs this season?
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