Big Brother’s on again? It hardly seems like a year has passed since Evel Dick won. Oh wait, it hasn’t been a year? Thank God, thought I was losing it. It seems BB is giving us a late Christmas gift with an extra edition of BB this year.It’s morning time, and we need to check in with the new hamsters and see who will be the early riser every day. First one up today is Sheila, and I’ve got money on the fact that with her age, and the fact she’s the mother of a teenager, she’ll be the first up every day. She sits around looking totally thrilled to be there, takes a shower, eats breakfast, and does the dishes. She’s a thrilling one to watch already! Amanda and Alex are looking quite cozy together in the HoH bed, and Ryan is still sleeping, snoring his head off, and at this point, Allison is still being nice to him about it. Wait until they’re together about … oh, 19 years or so. Then the kicking starts. Right, Hon?
BB announces to the HGs that it’s time for them to get up for the day, and everyone scatters, getting up. It’ll be a few weeks before they start flipping BB off and coming up with smart comments, and otherwise ignoring BB. Now that their secret’s out of the bag, Jen and Ryan can lay around together and chit chat.
I can’t for the life of me figure out why if Amanda considers herself the heaviest girl there, she insists on wearing that skin tight see through outfit. It’s like Jen’s unitard from last year. That same type of hideous.
Everyone gets put on a lockdown, and they wonder what it’s for, mentioning they haven’t even made HOH nominations yet. It’s thought that perhaps something is being built outside. Jen has to run to the DR, as it seems she broke her microphone. While talking Real World and Flavor of Love, James admits to turning on Telemundo and jacking off, because of the size of the host’s breasts. Well, that’s an odd thing to admit to. And why Telemundo? She can’t be the only person on TV with large breasts. He must really love Natalie. Back with a new microphone, now Jen can’t figure out how to work the coffee pot. Is this Amber?
Natalie worked at Starbucks for while, but now that she is a bikini barista, she won’t go near the place. She wants to open up her own chain where the servers wear mermaid bikinis. Scratch the earlier comment. If she’d put on sweats, I’d think maybe she was Amber. Alex is asked if when he and Amanda took a bath together, if they were naked, but he claims she didn’t want to.
Random chatter: Speaking of last year, Chelsia was in the final 20 for HGs last season and thinks they would have had an enemy for her, as they called her about it. Parker says, “Have you seen Laura? Have you seen Laura?” If you’re looking for me, Parker, I’m right here! James asks how to make sunny side up eggs, as he wants to make Chelsia breakfast in bed. Well, that’s sweet!
Matt is really weirded out with Natalie. He just wants to be friends, but it’s becoming more and more clear to him that she wants much more. She even wants him to travel to “The Beaver State” to visit her. Why does she insist on repeating that over and over? He’s turned off by her, he says, as he doesn’t like fake boobs. Great job, BB, with that matchup! Matt is worried that if he keeps putting her off, that she’ll throw comps just to get back at him.
Sheila wants to get together with Alex, and it’s not only Adam she don’t like, but Matt as well. Amanda says she doesn’t like Alex too much and says he hasn’t really tried anything with her yet. So what was all that spooning going on last night? And what do you call him asking her to take a bath with him naked? That wasn’t trying to get with her? I don’t know why, but sitting with the guys, Chelsia utters, “Your prostate is what?”
A stunning admission, Sheila admits she dropped out of school in the 8th grade to pursue acting and modeling. What the … who lets their kid drop out of school before high school even, to pursue entertainment? She wants to go back some day. If they make a movie of her life, though, she wants Lindsay Lohan to play her. Apropos? She sent pictures to Hugh Hefner and he never got them, but Bob Guccione did. He hired her right away and brought her to New York when she was 18. She claims she never knew it would be modeling nude. She didn’t tell her mom, but her mom ended up seeing her in Penthouse anyway. As far as acting, she’s done a few movies and Letterman. Well, not done Letterman, but … well maybe. She was one of the “Pigs in the Poke” on European Vacation. Well, that brings forth images.
This leads Natalie to say her family found out she was a stripper because her uncle saw her leaving the parking lot of the strip club. The other strippers made fun of her because she didn’t drink at all, and she’d be doing homework in the back of the club. She also points out she never did cocaine. They all realize there are a lot of April birthdays in the house.
A notice goes up on the screen that the nominations are today, and Amanda mentions that they moved into the house last Thursday, with Sheila and Jacob being evicted very late on Saturday night. Well, they hardly had a chance to even unpack! After finishing with Parker’s hair, Amanda moves on to telling the others about her road rage story from when she was on her way to the “BB finals,” so she must mean the audition finals? She was in front of an animal shelter, and traffic cops were stopping the cars to let animals across, but someone leaned on his horn at her for stopping, then came up aside her, sideswiped her new 300Z, and then hit it with a baseball bat. Wow. That’s a little frightening. She thought the guy was a skinhead and on drugs. Generalize much?
Talking about anger, Matt and Parker discuss what to do about if they go up on the block against each other, and also disuse the fight with Jacob before he left. There’s some weird comparison about mashed potatoes and broccoli, but I have no idea what they’re talking about. Meanwhile, Jen is telling the other girls she thinks she’ll have to vote out Matt to gain their trust. Right. Like that’s going to happen. Anyone that believes that wasn’t paying attention to Dick and Danielle last summer.
Hopefully the nominations will happen soon. Not that it would be a big shocker to any of us, as it looks like it will be Jen and Ryan and their respective mates. I’d hate to see them leave, though, so I’m hoping one of them gets power of veto. It will be interesting to see how that plays out with couples.
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