Spoilers abound in this post, so if you don’t want to read them you should just stop right here! This whole evening was like a high school house party gone wrong. You know, when young’uns drink too much and then everything becomes a major crisis?
The live feeds kicked in with some action right off the bat. The first thing we saw was Parker, who was really angry with Jen. It seems as though there’s a final six alliance in place already, and it includes Alex and Amanda, Parker and Jen, and Matt and Natalie.
The kicker here is that Jen and Ryan’s secret is out – everyone knows that they’re boyfriend and girlfriend. So how did they manage not to be in the same alliance, and how on earth did they figure this would ever work? Jen insists that she won’t ever put Ryan on the block, and this upsets Parker. He goes on a rant about how Jen is the most selfish person in the house.
Sheila and Adam are, remarkably, still in the house. The couple that’s been evicted already is Sharon and Jacob. No one speaks about them though, so I can’t tell you how that all played out. We’ll have to wait until tonight’s episode to see some of what went down.
The group tries to convince Jen that she’s there to play a game, and that she’ll have to turn on Ryan eventually anyway. This argument continues for most of the night, with Amanda trying to play peacemaker between everyone. On a side note, Amanda’s dressed in an outfit that would have been right at home in the early 80s. Are asymmetrical stripes and off-the-shoulder shirts coming back? Lord help us.
The new HoH couple is Alex and Amanda, and Alex is just as upset with Jen as Parker is. He threatens to put Jen/Parker and Ryan/Alison on the block together just to break up the couple.
There’s a lot of booze flowing tonight, and Alison especially is feeling no pain. She alludes to Parker that she needs to stay in the house because there’s something in her real life that’s causing her to need a break. She won’t say what that is though. She walks around repeating herself, having trouble balancing on her own two feet, and slurring her words. She seems to be a happy drunk though.
Parker walks around wearing a crown that looks like it was lifted from an Imperial Margarine commercial. Do we really have to have throwbacks to Dustin, of all people? He tries to play the martyr, offering to sacrifice himself to get Jen out of the house. He mentions this dozens of times, saying that at least he’ll leave the game with his integrity.
Joshuah is annoyed and hurt that no one is inviting him to talk strategy with them. Dude, remember Zach? Don’t be a Zach.
Jen cries a lot, mostly to Ryan. Matt claims that the alliance is toast, but Amanda really wants to try and keep it together. Apparently the hamsters have been threatened with penalty nominations if they don’t sleep with their partner, and if the HoH couple can’t agree on who to nominate, they get nominated themselves.
Parker and Ryan yell at each other outside because Ryan doesn’t want anyone dissin’ his girl, and there are threats of hitting. But nothing comes of this, of course.
After some more drunken rambling, Jen and Parker end up alone, trying to talk things out. Jen claims that she was planning on voting Ryan out of the house, but because of the way that Parker treated her she changed her mind. Do I believe her? No way. She had a discussion with Ryan earlier, in which he coached her to tell Parker what he wants to hear and then do whatever she wants to. Parker feels that, as long as Ryan is in the house, Jen is going to play the game personally and not for herself or for Parker.
After much more circle-talk, Parker apologizes to Jen and tells her that he called her some really nasty stuff. Jen’s upset because it’ll be on national television. Gah. They hug and make up, although I’m not sure this truce will last. Parker admits that he lost it because he was so angry.
Meanwhile, Natalie tells a sob story about how her mother is a schizo and her father was never around, so she basically raised herself. Matt isn’t happy with Natalie (or Natty, as they call her – and no, I’m not making a comment on that one) and complains that she wants to make babies with him but he’s just not interested. He doesn’t think she’s all that bright. Hee.
There’s lots of half-naked people in and around the hot tub. James is in his pink undies, and the women are stripped down to teeny bikinis for the most part. Amanda likes to brag about her ass and how hard it is, asking the guys to smack it. She has the most annoying voice in the house. Natalie looks like she’s going to fall out of her bikini at any moment. She tells everyone that she bought her boobs in Vegas, and they’re C cups. My ass they’re C’s. Those puppies are LEAST double D’s.
Amanda goes upstairs to talk with Parker and Jen, and they try to work out some kind of strategy where Jen and Parker will go on the block, but whoever they’re up against will be the ones actually going. This, apparently, will make the others think that the “six” alliance is toast.
Ryan comes up, and Parker goes out to apologize to him as well. There we go, drama is all over for the evening.
Alex and Amanda take a bubble bath together. She wants to talk strategy, he doesn’t. It’s not really all that sexy or romantic, although all of the camera close-ups of Amanda’s boobs are trying to make it look otherwise.
Slowly people start heading off to bed. Jen and Parker stay up and talk, and Jen agrees to vote Ryan out for the sake of the alliance. Apparently Amanda really wants Alison out of the house, so she’s definitely putting Ryan and Alison on the block. I wonder what’ll happen if Jen and Parker win the veto?
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