Blue Team: Macho 1, Rebecca, Baby Hands, Matt, Paz and Orlando
Rebecca – Chocolate Beet Cake, Beet Cream Cheese, and Orange Sauce
Sally- Chocolate and Raspberry Tarte Nouveau and Lychee Sorbet
Rebecca Rhubarb Rose Crisp with Crème Fraiche Sherbet
Baby Hands – Pink Lemonade with Rose Cava Gélee
Matt – White Chocolate Cherry and Pistachio Entremet
Paz – Passion Fruit Cheesecake Lollipop and Pink Chocolate Namelaka.
Red Team: Rockman, Carlos, Katzie, Macho 2, Megan, Hammer
Rockman – Cava Gelée with Buttermilk Foam, Hibiscus, and Raspberry
Carlos – Guava Pâte de Fruit, Fromage Blanc. and Phyllo Cigar
Katzie – Macaron with Mascarpone, Strawberry Jam and Mint
Melissa – White Chocolate Crémeux, Rose Gelée, Rhubarb Foam
Megan – Pink Velvet Cake with Chocolate Mousse, Cherries, and Cream Cheese Sorbet
Hammer – Strawberry Streusel with Almond Cream and Rose Vanilla Ice Cream. and the showpiece too.
To me, Megan’s looked the best, even if Unibrow thought it was more of a black velvet cake. Macho 1 was in some trouble for the overly melted sorbet. Unibrow called it a pettifour with melted sorbet. Matt’s was a nice looking dish, while Paz’s was way out there with pink. And we got a clip from the RH of one of them performing a borderline sex act on cotton candy. Classy. Baby Hands’ lemonade made them all make sour faces, and he got slammed for not including a straw.
Orlando’s brilliant showpiece was overwhelmed by the flowers on the table (which he added). Rebecca’s crumble also gets high marks. Ironically, Rebecca and Matt had two of the best dishes, but…
…The Hammer/Rockman team wins, and Rockman does not get upset that Hammer gets much of the credit from the judges. Paz and Macho 1 battle it out for last place, as Baby Hands’ immunity saves him.
Elvis made that clear by telling him he would have been gone if not for the immunity. It came down to Paz’s ugly lollipop or Macho 1’s melted sorbet. Baby Hands is feeling guilty that he may have “signed a death certificate.” He didn’t. Paz goes home. One fun nickname down, many more to go.
• Orlando stepped up and had his Anakin at the Jedi Temple moment as he embraced his villainy by telling people they need to stop the whining. The Orlando vs. the cast dynamic may become fun.
• Matt and Hammer have a bromance going. And I can live a long and happy life if the word bromance goes away.
• Macho 2 is falling further and further into my you-know-what list, she went with the “bold flavors” line, which is the kiss of death to me. When Top Chefers start describing their food as having “big, bold flavors,” you know that the dishes will not be big and bold.
• She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named named her daughter Pandora. If she was a baby I would have blamed Avatar, but she’s a friggin grown up woman named Pandora. If she’s not a witch, then she missed her calling.
• Megan is doing a macaroon, and somewhere Morgan approves.
• Rockman’s leadership was clear this week, to the point where she pulled a 25th Amendment and removed herself from leadership and handed it off to Hammer because she was too sick. I now have a favorite this season, because she enabled me to reference the 25th Amendment of the Constitution.
• Orlando is doing a very impressive glass blowing technique, and somewhere Yigit is claiming he got copied.
• Paz solved a Rubik’s Cube. I wonder if he had survived if we would have witnessed his mastery of Galaga next time.
• Rebecca was channeling Coco Chanel by removing items from the table, which was the correct move. Meanwhile, she was being Coco Blocked by Orlando and others. And yes, I created the term Coco Blocked ™
• Which was more prominent at the table – the color pink, or lip collagen?
• Rebecca called the Housewife her favorite “character” – and that sentence defines why I hate those so-called reality shows. The competition ones I love all teeter on the edge of person or character from time to time, but those other “me, me, me” shows are all about that. Hate.
• Extra scene – the only funny moment for the guest, as she schools Elvis on English slang and the meaning of the word tart. Elvis saying he was “going into your tart” and that it was a “tight, tight tart” made all Top Chef: London fans snicker.
Next week, er, tomorrow – They recreate Willy Wonka for the original cast. And no Real Housewives to be found.
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