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Top Chef: All-Stars – Ep 7 – Perfect Storm of Awfulness

Etch gets called in first, sending Blais into a downward spiral of self-loathing. But it was a switcheroo as they were clearly in last, in fact, only 17 of 76 diners liked Etch. Tom calls them out on the disorganization in the kitchen, asking them if someone should have stepped up to organize it, and no one said a word. The silence was deafening.

Angelo thinks his peppercorns were from the South of France – Ludo disagrees, and since he is French, I believe him. Tom wanted more flavor from Mike, and Tony thought the octopus needed some char. Tony also thinks that Antonia could do oxtail in her sleep, but these were salty. Ludo gives Marcel the “mushy” critique, and Tony thinks the dessert was like a “Thumb in the eye” at the end of the meal. Tiffany pulled the flavor out of the asparagus thanks to the soaking in cold water.

Mike and Marcel get into it over Marcel’s poor management and questionable decisions. Marcel blames Mike for being too slow and lazy. Angelo summed it up well (that’s right, I said those words), “we acted like children, not professionals.” And the childreniest child of them all goes home. Bye Bye Marcel – I will miss your continually lame attempts at acting like a rapper.

Quickfire Hits
• I forgot about the Black Hammer!!! Antonia is the kiss of death – in her season if you worked with her on a team, you were going home. And this year, she works in a trio with Jamie and Tiffani and they both went home. And this week, her team loses and Marcel goes home. The Black Hammer lives!
• Big episode – you know how you can know? Super fast credits.
• Tiffany’s front work was so bad. Amazing how someone so personable can transform like that. She just turned into a fake laugher. You know people like that. It was sad to watch happen.
• Strange line from Blais regarding the Bodega theme – “If your redneck cousin wins the lottery, they’d dip caviar in ranch dressing.” How random – it is so random it sounds like a spy password.
• Marcel was doomed the minute he blew off Tom. You don’t mess with The Head Chef.
• Marcel doomed moment number two – “I left Angelo in charge of my dish.” Why! Angelo is The Mole!!
• Is anyone better at being Basil Exposition than Blais?
• Padma’s outfit at the challenge…makes up for the earlier debacle.
• Marcel’s best line upon returning to The Stew Room – “Blais, you can stop worrying.”
• Tony’s complement of Bodega – “Stoner Food at its finest.” HA!
• Lastly, from Tony on Etch – “Prison breaks are more organized and more efficient and have better teamwork” than them.

Next week – Sopranos reunion?

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