home Archive And THIS Is Why I Love: Jersey Shore: T-Shirt Tiiiiiiime

And THIS Is Why I Love: Jersey Shore: T-Shirt Tiiiiiiime

Everyone loves a cliffhanger! Exactly what happened between Angelina and Sitch at the open doorway as they shouted at each other? Well, it’s really no surprise. Angelina punched Sitch in the face. When the random guy from the beach pulls her off onto the couch and her friend pulls Sitch away, she threatens to hit him over the head with a glass if he touches her—because she can hit him and he can’t hit her apparently—and then calls him a jerkoff as he calls her a ho several times. Then he instructs that you don’t hit another roommate. Which I find kind of funny.

SloppyRon and Sam arrive home and he interviews that something must be wrong because Sitch has ADD and never sits still quietly and that’s how they’ve found him. Heh heh heh. Sitch tells them what happened. Then DJPaulyD asks who the guy is and Angelina adamantly declares, He’s my friend! Because she’s a six-year-old. What is this guy doing still hanging around this house? Does he want to be on television so badly that he’s getting as much camera time as possible? Then he gives Angelina his number as the other roommates ask that he leave so they can work out the issue. Perhaps it’s a fake number. Perhaps he’s a glutton for punishment. Perhaps he was rejected from the auditions for Jersey Shore and this is his way of sticking it to the casting directors.

Sitch explains that they cannot hug this out because Angelina crossed a line. She goes outside and the big house meeting breaks up just like that. Vincenzo wonders why all the girls have been throwing down lately. Sitch doesn’t want to forget this happened because he got hit even though he sort of feels bad that Angelina is crying outside.

DJP reminds them that Angelina hit him too, and no matter what, no one should put their fingers on anyone. Then he says that she brings home guys and guys should bring home girls and girls should not do that and she is dirty. That whole lecture sounds dirty. The three guys decide to put her stuff outside but they don’t actually do it.

Angelina comes back inside, ignores the guys, and goes to her room. She fake cries as her friend watches her.

JWoWW and her boyfriend come back to the house and Sitch can’t wait to tell them that he got hit in the face by Angelina. He points out that the only reason Angelina hit him is that he can’t hit her back, but if she stepped to a girl, she would get beaten. JWoWW goes outside to tell Angelina that she deserves her spot in the house and reminds everyone that she clocked Sitch last summer. Angelina is surprised that JWoWW tells her to stay and they hug even though they are not friends.

** Sidenote: World Of Jenks? Is 30 Days without Morgan Spurlock.

Angelina feels bad that her friend came down to see her and have a good time but got stuck in all this drama.

Meanwhile, Vincenzo and DJP are sitting on the couch and singing in the most obnoxious voices ever. Then the four boys sing that it’s almost T-Shirt Time. Omigod, this used to be cute and now it is the most annoying thing ever in the world. DJP admits that they may have had too much sun. Roger that.

Sitch calls the cab company and orders a taxi for six people and two people on the other end of the line cannot grasp that his name is Situation. I am on their side because that’s not a name. You name is Michael. Deal with it. Still, this is pretty amusing.

Before they go out, Sitch’s girl from [url=http://www.realityshack.com/modules/magazine/article.php?articleid=1893]last week[/url] —the one he almost boned in the club bathroom and who then disappeared and then left her number on the front gate—arrives at the house. He gives her a tour and they choose an outfit for her to wear later on when they bang it out in the smash room. This? Is disturbing. Is this a normal thing that people do now?

On the way to the club, Vincenzo asks that no one lay anyone out in the first two hours so that he can have a good time tonight. SloppyRon. Heh heh.

Angelina bumps into Jose at the club. She tries to be the bigger person by not hanging out with the roommates at the club.

And now it’s time for dancing.

Samantha, Sitch’s girl, gets all bent out of shape when another girl dances with Sitch. He pushes the girl and threatens her. He tells Sam what Samantha did and Samantha boasts about it. Then Sitch and Samantha make out. He suddenly realizes, hey this girl wants to bang me so why did I even come out? So everyone heads home.

The happy new couple changes into their pre-picked-out outfits and heads straight to the smash room. Vincenzo, DJP, Angelina, her friend, and Jose hang out in the kitchen when they hear Samantha moaning and screaming. Jose calls her a nice slut. Sitch loves Canada.

When Angelina goes to bed, she tells Jose that she and he will sleep in Sitch’s bed while her friend sleeps in her bed. Jose doesn’t want to but Angelina says it’s fine. After smashing, Sitch goes to his room and finds the two of them in his bed. He says she should have asked first. I bet if DJP did that and didn’t ask first, he wouldn’t care. Because although we haven’t seen it come out lately, Sitch has a non-sexual-hetero-man-crush on DJP and probably wants him to sleep there.

The next morning, Samantha comes to breakfast with Vincenzo and DJP and Sitch shamelessly. When Sitch goes in the other room, Vincenzo asks Samantha how good Sitch was, calling it all girl talk. Sitch gets her a cab and the romance is over.

Jose thanks Sitch for letting him stay in the bed. Sitch says it’s cool. Then he tells Angelina she’s disrespectful because she didn’t thank him. She says she did last night. Umm, no she didn’t. She says thank you to his face and he says that Jose is respectful for saying thank you.

Angelina’s friend packs up and gets ready to leave the house. She’s happy to be getting the hell out of there. She says she had so much fun. Really? The screaming and punching is fun? Terrific.

Sitch complains in the living room about how Angelina and Jose slept in his bed. JWoWW is just finding this out and thinks it’s disturbing because a few hours before going to bed, Angelina had punched Sitch. Okay, that is logical reasoning. Sitch’s reasoning, not so much, but JWoWW is making a point here. Angelina is giving people reasons to not like her. FYI: Snooki is on the couch. Where the heck did she come from? I wonder if this is around the time she had to go to the hospital for [url=http://www.nypost.com/p/blogs/tvblog/shore_star_treated_for_alcohol_poisoning_pD7eF62Kxq5fES4oIKWIKL]alcohol poisoning[/url]that MTV did not include in the aired footage.

Angelina walks through and immediately Sitch and she get into a shouting match about how she slept in the bed without asking. Again. She tells him to drop it. He says that she should drop her fat ass. She tells him to drop his face. Might I remind you that these are two of the older people in the house? Angelina promises she will be a bitch to anyone who steps on her from now on because she has earned her place in the house as much as the rest of them. Sitch continues to yell at her and she yells back and blah blah blah it’s so old.

Then DJP decides to wake everyone up the next morning. Oh yeah wake up yeah! Oh, god, so annoying. I don’t think I heart DJP anymore.

The boys pile into the car. It smells like cheese. SloppyRon literally gags. DJP finds a cheese sandwich and throws it out of the car. They continue driving with the windows cracked a pinch. Umm, if the car smells, shouldn’t you open all the windows all the way?

Angelina asks JWoWW if anyone else said more about her this morning. Then she leaves the kitchen to fake cry. JWoWW eats a slice of turkey. Or bologna.

While at work, Snooki writes up a list of things she needs in a gorilla juice head guido to be her soulmate. Then she must mop. When she gets home, she shows JWoWW her wish list. JWoWW is upset because Tom has to go home. Awww, they are so cute together. JWoWW’s mission this week is to find Snooki a guy at the gym, the beach, tanning, or at the Ed Hardy Store.

The boys arrive home and JWoWW says that Angelina doesn’t know if she’s leaving. Sitch takes this as Angelina is going home. Snooki tells Sam that Angelina wants to leave because she doesn’t like it here. Sitch tells SloppyRon the same thing. This is totally not what JWoWW said. Then SloppyRon uses the phrase: No hair off my back. What? Does that? Even? Mean?

Sitch invites Angelina to dinner and the club later on. That is a classy gesture. Angelina says she needs to figure out what she needs to figure out. This is why people do not like you, Angelina. Seriously. He should not have invited you. This is the most idiotic conversation. She starts in with them saying that none of them like her and she doesn’t understand why she should hang out with a bunch of fake people. So then Sitch says that no one cares if she leaves. And that is probably true, if it wasn’t five minutes ago, now because Angelina just called all of them out.

They all go out to the club and have a good time without Angelina. DJP’s girl is there and they laugh and smile and have a good time. He wants to spend as much time as he can with her while they are in Miami. This is kind of sweet.

Meanwhile, Snooki is dancing in the club in her sunglasses and headband. She doesn’t see any gorilla juice heads but she does see Alex, a guy Angelina had already brought home. She brings him back home where Angelina has packed up to leave. She waits for them to get home to tell them that she’s leaving on her own, not because of them. As if they care. She then notes that Snooki brought home the guy she was with and thinks it’s all sloppy seconds. The guy goes over to say hi to Angelina and says something like they’re all friends and he came back to be everyone’s friend. Omg, this is hilarious.

Then DJP asks Angelina how Jose is. Snooki tells Alex to stay away on the couch because he shouldn’t talk to Angelina if he came home with a different girl. He again says he’s everyone’s friend. Then Snooki comes over to the couch and calls out Angelina for having sex with Vincenzo after she did. Angelina points out that Snooki brought home Alex. Snooki says this is why no one likes her. Angelina says that she doesn’t give a fuck about anyone and they are all fake and she can’t stand any of them (any of “yous” actually).

So then Snooki hands off her earrings to someone and jumps on Angelina to fight. Sitch moves the table out of the way so that they can roll on the floor. JWoWW steps in to pull Angelina off of Snooki. Then Snooki comes back in, grabs what I think are condoms out of a vase on the table, and then Angelina and Snooki battle it out on the floor as everyone stands around. Snooki stands up and says that she’s still either pretty or here. This fight is completely absurd. Then Angelina leaves.

Outside, Angelina yells at SloppyRon and Sam for not being her friend in the house. They point out that she just called them fake. Angelina was hoping that someone would tell her to stay. Umm, JWoWW did that already. Go home. She calls out to Sitch that he needs Botox. And then, the Age of Angelina is over. She climbs into a cab in the middle of the night and heads off. Where exactly she’s going, I have no idea because she doesn’t have a plane ticket, does she?

Vincenzo gets all excited because now he gets to sleep in Sitch’s and DJP’s room. DJP gives Vincenzo a tour of the room and gives him all of Angelina’s shelves, which is a small spot on the floor. That seems about right.



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