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Top Chef: DC, Ep. 3 – An Insult To Italians, and No, Not Jersey Shore


Moby – Grilled Pork Butt with Lemongrass Glaze, Polenta and Cucumber Salad.  Moby is so excited about the meat and would love to “eat the ass out of this pig all day.”  Gail likes it, but Obi-Wan wishes he went for a more spicy kick.

Tim – Pork Two Ways: Dry Loin with Wet Baby Back Ribs, Grilled Vegetables.  Tim likes to make two proteins … WATCH OUT, FLYING DUCK CRAP!!!!  Whoa.  The judges scatter as water fowl fly over head and almost get a bulls-eye into Tim’s
dishes.  As it turns out, it may have helped his side dishes out.  Tom says the pork is good, but the veggies, not so much.

Hot Amanda – Dry-Rub Baby Back Ribs, Grilled Asparagus and Bacon Hazelnut Vinaigrette.  I will resist a dry rub joke with Hot Amanda.  Gail says her ribs are better than Tim’s, making Tim die a little inside.  Obi-Wan implies that she had him with the grilled asparagus.  Interestingly, Angelo goes over to taste hers and comments on how good it is, and is probably better than his.  Stunning coming from someone who is so arrogant. 

Kelly – Bison Burger, Watermelon and Tomato Salad.  Tom finds it too bland, while Gail, despite complimenting her on the same thing in the Quickfire, finds it to be too simple.  Is there no pleasing you, Food and Wine Lady?

Sbarro – Grilled Marinated Flank Steak, Rice and Beans, Tomato and Avocado Salad.  Gail wonders if anyone noticed the weird texture of the beans, while Tom asks if anyone noticed the blandness of the rice.

Lynne – Leg of Lamb with Ras El Hanout, Zucchini “Spaghetti” with Balsamic Onions.  Padma finds it too heavy due to cheese.

Kenny – Harissa Marinated Pork Loin, Quinoa Grilled Eggplant. Gail thinks it is a well-cooked good idea. 

Tracey – Italian Sausage Slider, Tomato, Cucumber and Red Onion Salad.  Tom finds waaaay too much fennel in his slider.  Obi-Wan thinks it isn’t really a slider because it is so big.  Gail thinks hers is undercooked.

Tiffany – Tamarino Glazed Wild Sockeye Salmon, Israeli Couscous.  Tom found there to be no flavor.

Andrea – Spicy Root Beer Glazed Skirt Steak, Potato Salad.  Tom says, “Boy, that’s root beer.”  Gail concurs that it is far too sweet.

Stephen – Bacon Wrapped Sea Bass, Ratatouille, and Olive Pine Nut Couscous.  I have said it before, not Chilean Sea Bass, it is Patagonian Tooth Fish. And Stephen’s is essentially inedible, wrapped in undercooked bacon.  Yuck.

Ed – Spiced Tuna loin with Lentil Hummus.  Obi-Wan is surprised how picnic-friendly it is.  Tom is also surprised by the amount of flavor involved.

The Winners – Arnold, Ed, Hot Amanda and Angelo get chosen.  Ed’s was bright and bold.  Arnold’s a nice surprise and full of flavor.  Hot Amanda basically killed
Obi-Wan with her asparagus.  I guess that’s
better than a red lightsaber.
Angelo’s was nice and crispy.  Arnold takes a somewhat surprising win and is happy to be noticed for who he is – which I guess is a lamb meatball.


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