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Amazing Race 16 – Ep. 3 Commentary – How About Them Cowboys?


The Claires, Monique and Shawne – I get that she struggled with the lassoing, I get that they struggled with the polo, what I don’t get is the subsequent decision. They knew that when the Cops finished the task that they were in last place. They only thing that could save them was to finish the task and hope one of these other teams of rocket scientists got lost. So what did the Claires do? They switched tasks. Really. They did that. Even if they were holding out that it was a non-elimination leg (which it never is this early, except last season due to the starting line elimination) then just take the penalty and go to the mat.

And let me just once again add that one of the things that bugs me the most about Amazing Race production – and this is a very, very short list of things – is the editing to make it look as if a plea to a higher power managed to help a team complete a task or get the better flight time. It is officially time to retire this bit. Let me state once and for all – God, Jesus, Allah, Buddha, Zeus, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, Elvis, Gandalf, Jon Stewart, or tiny midichlorians have nothing to do with winning reality shows.

Joe/Heidi – However, it will never, ever get old to see the show give schadefreude edits to guys who deserve it. Case in point – Joe tries to use his watch GPS to find the buried treasure. Let me add, that watch should have been confiscated from the start. Regardless, for trying to use a shortcut and not listening to his wife, he failed the task and was forced to do the other one. The one he bragged would be easy. So the editors gave us as a reward for listening to him beat his chest not one, but two shots of him falling face first off the wooden horse. That’s right, he got thrown from a fake horse. All is forgiven Amazing Race editors.

The Cops, Louie and Michael – I now know that Michael is the tall one. Other than that, these guys continue to suck.

Before heading to the Route Markers, again The Amazing Race visits a site soon to be devastated by natural disaster. Following the footsteps of Sri Lanka and New Orleans, Chile got hit hard with an awful earthquake this weekend as we watched the beauty of the country unfold on CBS on this show. I am sure I speak for most of you when I say my heart breaks for the Chileans, so soon after having the same sadness for the Haitian people. Please, no more.

Route Markers

• Did anyone have flashbacks as the teams travelled through the mountains from Chile to Argentina? I kept expecting them to find Debbie/Bianca driving aimlessly while looking for the mountains. Sadly though, no Meatblock awaited these racers this time.

• Oh yeah, the Gnome returned. I will say nothing other than, thanks Travelocity for saving my favorite show from cancellations. In return, I will endure your product placement.

• Cowboys-ism #1 – “We don’t have to run like scalded dogs.”

• Cowboys-ism #2 – “We don’t have mountains like this in Oklahoma.”

• Why was Sam Elliott dealing cards to a Travelocity Gnome? And why did that gnome have a shot of whiskey?

• Cowboys-ism #3 (after getting the trophy for finishing the polo task) – “I’d like to thank everyone.”

•Cops-ism #1 – (getting the same trophy) – “SPARTA!” Nice 300 joke, dude. Got any other dated 2006 humor about Crash beating Brokeback Mountain?

• Miss Teen gets in the act – “Unfortunately, Brent can’t drive friggin stick shift.” Come on! Even Miss The Iraq is ripping on you for doing something stupid, Brent! And I know I called for the end of jokes riffing on her pageant speech, but I meant mean ones against her. This is mocking Brent. That’s still ok.

• I did like the Cops drawing some weird touch football play in the dirt with a stick. That’s some fine planning there guys.

Roadblock (Lasso a set of horns tied to a haybale) – Jet, Carol, Heidi, Jeff, Steve, Dan, Louie, Brent, Shawne

Detour – Sense (use old technology to find a buried bag of treasure and deliver it to the head bandit) – Crandy (bailed to Power), Big Brother (one of only two teams to complete the task), Joe/Heidi (bailed), Dan/Boy Jordan (bailed), Cops (bailed)
Power (take turns sitting on a wooden practice horse and score a polo goal with no more than nine swings) – Cowboys, Steve/Allie, Miss Teen, Claires (bailed)

Order of finish – Cowboys, Steve/Allie, Crandy, Joe/Heidi, Big Brother, Dan/Boy Jordan, Miss Teen, Cops, Claires (ELIMINATED)

Next week – Hamburg. Giant beers. And an Intersection.

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