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And THIS Is Why I Love Jersey Shore: Punch Drunk Love



Let’s just jump into it. Some sorry piece of shit, a pathetic excuse for a man, a less-than-human form punched our dear Snooki in the face. He hit her so hard that her head snapped back. She collapsed to the floor, sobbing and cradling her face. :cry:

Before we go on about the events here, let’s talk a little bit about MTV’s decision to “not air the footage.” Newsflash, MTV idiots, you used this piece of footage as part of the teasers before you started airing the season. You completely exploited the violence against little Snooki to cull a foundation of viewers. Sure, exploitation is your M.O., and I ain’t mad atcha about that. What I’m pissed about is your fake take-the-higher-road decision to pull the bit during the actual show. :bs:

If you were that concerned, you:

(A) would not have aired the footage at all ever

(B) would not have aired the episode, or at least that portion of it

(C) would not have cut the episode in the middle of the fight, carrying it over into the next episode.

Your fancy cutting around the actual punch created more intrigued and sent avid viewers out to find the actual punch online. For shame, MTV, for shame!

The final frames of text that inform us that violence against women is unacceptable is a piss-poor attempt at hiding the exploitation. I agree that violence against women is unacceptable. You know why? Here’s a tip: Violence against ANYONE is unacceptable. Violence is wrong. Plain and simple. It proves nothing. It solves nothing.

So once again, I say, For shame, MTV, for shame!

Now, onto the punchfest that Jersey Shore has become.

First off, back to Snooki’s face. I don’t know how this guy made it out of the bar alive. He sucker punched her across one of her co-workers who was standing between them. The female bartender ran away to take cover, and I don’t blame her. The Situation stands by looking on, and I honestly think he was stunned by it and didn’t realize it was actually happening. It’s a poor defense, but I’m trying to save him some face. He could have dropped down to help her, too, but didn’t do that. He stood there. Watching. :shock: Stunned. (Or was a big pussy pants—whichever).

This poor excuse for a human being was lucky the cops were there. Otherwise, I do believe that Pauly D, Vinny, RonRon, J-WOWW (yes, J-WOWW who is seen throwing punches at him), and their t-shirt co-workers out with them at the bar would have pounded him until he was unrecognizable. :foot: And he would have deserved it. See? Violence begets violence. Stop the cycle, people! Stop the cycle.

This ass is/was a gym teacher for NYC. He’s molding minds for the future. That’s a nice lesson to teach your students—pound on girls’ faces when they annoy you. I know that teachers are human beings and are not flawless, but if they are on camera, perhaps they shouldn’t beat people. In fact, I’m going to go as far as saying, even if they are not on camera, they shouldn’t beat people.

Pinkman Vinny comes out on top during this altercation. Our thus-far quiet smiling Vinny gets steamed, vows to Snooki that the puncher will not be able to walk the boardwalk again, and then takes out his anger on the local street paraphernalia like fire hydrants and garage doors.

The Situation does come out looking like an ass with his complete inaction as his only reaction and then his attempt to get a girl to come back to the house when they all crowd around the Snooks to take her home. As RonRon points out, it is pretty shitty.

What’s even worse is the phone call Snooki gets later on. It’s an automated message from the police department saying that the punk made bail. She should not be too worried. As Vinny said, he’s not going to be able to walk the boardwalk for too long before someone uses his head as a pinata.

This violent incident is not the only violent incident. The footage is the most disturbing because the punch is so unexpected and so full-force. The other footage MTV gladly shows because it’s not man-on-woman.

It’s a scruff-fest and we’re all invited!

A day (I think) after Snooki’s face swells, J-WOWW and she go out drinking. Some other girls at the bar call Snooki fat. J-WOWW does not like that at all. Suddenly, it’s all hair and boobs and nails. Instead of walking away and ignoring the insult that should mean nothing coming from strangers they’ll never see again, J-WOWW takes it to heart and pounds on these girls. A lot. Bouncers break it up. She adjusts her boobs. She and Snooki find some place else to drink.

Home is supposed to be a safe place. Unfortunately, The Situation’s penchant for finding less-than-desireable girls takes a turn for the worse. [b][url=http://www.realityshack.com/modules/magazine/article.php?articleid=1648]Remember the girl who cockblocked him, who Pauly D called annoying?[/url][/b] She comes back when The Situation’s girl comes back, and they bring a third who no one likes. This is where The Situation really starts to look like somewhat of a pussy. He asks Snooki to tell the two annoying girls to leave so he can hook up with the cute friend. I don’t know why he thought the friend would stay if his roommate asked her friends to leave. But Snooki, the ever loyal roommie, tells the annoying girls that they can’t stay. The girl The Situation likes goes to leave as well.

Then comes the scruff. The two girls start talking about Snooki and Snooki, not to be insulted in her own home, goes after them. They come back charging her. It’s only a few days after The Punch Heard Round The Shore, and Snooki gets smacked right where she’d been punched by a much larger girl. Pauly D, RonRon, Vinny, and Snooki’s ass of a friend Mike push the girls out of the house. At some point, J-WOWW shows up in the mix. Snooki blames The Situation. I do, too.

He could have:

(A) asked them to leave on his own

(B) not let them in to begin with

The fighting is not yet over. At the bar another night, some guy starts in with Pauly D, asking where he’s from and why he’s at the Shore. Pauly D makes a good decision and tells the guy he doesn’t want to talk to him. When he hears the guy call him and The Situation two douchebags, he lets it go. Pauly D, The Peacemaker–[b][url=http://www.realityshack.com/modules/magazine/article.php?articleid=1639]that’s a much better nickname.[/url][/b]

Later on, the guy finds RonRon and Sammi walking on the boardwalk. The guy heckles and harrasses them. He follows them. RonRon tells him to cool it. Then Sammi starts talking smack to the guy’s girlfriend. She’s drunk and she’s not making good decisions. RonRon tries to get her to shut up and pushes her (this later on becomes the very unacceptable shove that causes a huge fight—instead of shoving her, he should have thrown her over his shoulder and ran the hell away).

Sammi walks away from RonRon because she doesn’t like him shoving her, leaving RonRon to fend for himself. He’s pissed that Sammi got pissed and that this guy won’t shut up, so he stops and tells the guy to take his best shot. The guy’s girlfriend stands between them, half-stopping them, half-fighting RonRon. The guy is trying to throw punches over his girlfriend. Then RonRon makes his move and tackles the guy. Sammi comes back as the two guys are rolling all over the boardwalk and she and the girl try to pull them apart. This goes on for what seems to be a rather long time without anyone intervening. In fact, it goes on long enough for one of Pauly D’s friends to call the house and tell whomever’s there that RonRon is in the middle of a fight.

Pauly D and The Situation run out to the boardwalk, looking for RonRon. Actually, it’s Pauly D who puts on his shoes first and says, Let’s go!, and then The Situation follows. While I don’t condone violence, I do allow The Peacemaker to step in and stop the violence. The Situation could have at least shown some more concern. Either that, or he’s simply really slow to catch on. I mean, come on, even J-WOWW jumps into fights more quickly to defend her friends. Anyway, when all is said and done, some random dude breaks up the fight and RonRon and Sammi walk away. Pauly D and The Situation catch up with RonRon while Sammi lags behind, upset that RonRon blames her for getting him into a fight (she did contribute to escalating it, but she did not tell him to stop and tell the guy to take a swing) and for pushing her (which he should not have done and felt sorry for).

In my lifetime, I have been in one physical altercation. I don’t think I could call it a fight. I was at a bar in college with my roommate and we were drunk and talking to everyone who walked by us. We were asking a very stupid question to everyone, I don’t remember what exactly. Some people were ignoring us. Some were answering. Some were making fun of us. It was all in good fun. Until mega-juice-head in a flannel came by. We asked the question. He stood there. Then he hovered ominously close. Then he took a step towards me. Then another. He was silently seething for no apparent reason.

Mind you, he was almost six feet tall and was as broad as a barn, and I’m 4’10” and 95 pounds.

On his next step towards me, I was like, Dude back up. He came at me with his full body and I put up my arms into his chest and shoved with all my power, screaming, Get the fuck away! He fell backwards into the people at the bar and then there was a lot of commotion as he tried to regain his balance and come back at me. Several guys grabbed him and dragged him outside while a guy in a tie-dyed shirt with shaggy blonde hair, very granola, picked me up and transported me to another part of the bar. His face was in mine as he frantically asked, Are you okay? Are you okay? I shrugged and said, Yeah I’m fine. The end.

I don’t know if that’s a fight. I don’t think it is. So that’s the most violence I’ve been involved in firsthand. If I see someone coming at me, which is not often and in fact does not happen ever, I attempt to get away. I don’t want to entertain violence. If I hear someone say something about me, which again aside from my students complaining is not often, I ignore it. If someone attempts to hit me, which has been this one aforementioned time, I will first try to get away and then I will defend myself. Once it’s over with, though, I will not seek vengeance or to get in the last punch. I just don’t like violence.

Forget the hazmat suit. If I ever return to the Jersey Shore, I’m going in with full body armor. I’m the throw-my-keys-and-run-away type of girl. I don’t think that would fly there.

You want summa dis? :banana4: [b][url=http://www.realityshack.com/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=2666&forum=13&post_id=41835#forumpost41835]Chat in the forums[/url][/b].


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