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Hell’s Kitchen, Oct. 7 – I Won’t Prolong Your Agony


Hopefully tonight I won’t have a headache at the end of the show since Suzanne is no longer there; I won’t be hitting my head against the wall. This seems to be the season of disastrous kitchen service. The final four seem a little dazed as they relax upstairs, i.e. smoking and drinking. Kevin is confident that he knows everyone else’s weaknesses.

The next morning at 6:30, three of the final four are just waking up; Dave is dressed and giving himself a pep-talk in the mirror. I’ve tried to do this in the past, but I usually zoom in on some weird freckle or something and the pep is lost.

They are greeted in the dining room with Chef Ramsay’s mini-me; British accent and all. Where does your day go when first thing in the morning you are called a donkey by a kid? It slides right into vegetarians; Chef Ramsay calls them pains, but a group that needs to be catered to in fine dining. Whew, my own 14-year-old is a vegetarian and … shh, don’t tell her, but it is a pain.

For the challenge they have to prepare a vegetarian dish which will be judged in an hour by eighty customers. They need to prepare 80 potions of their dish. The kitchen is fully stocked.

Kevin is preparing an Asian Style Crepe with Beet Carpaccio. He has no problems cooking in bulk because he works at a country club. I would worry about the crepes getting soggy.

Tennille is making Vegetable Stuffed Eggplant with Brown Rice and Creamy Mushroom Sauce.

Ariel will present a Grilled Eggplant Vegetable Lasagna.

Dave’s dish is Polenta Tower with Roasted Peppers and Goat Cheese. I was getting hungry for some eggplant parmesan until polenta and goat cheese came up; not big on the goat here. Dave is visibly in a lot of pain. He goes into the pantry for another pep talk.

The clock ticks down and the doors open. Eighty screaming children, led by mini-Gordo, run into the restaurant. As a twist, they don’t like vegetables. Judging on title alone, I would have to say Ariel has the best chance with this. Add fresh mozzarella and sauce to anything and it tastes good!

Tennille feels screwed with her stuffed eggplant. Dave says it is his worst nightmare because he doesn’t work well with children. Well he didn’t do well the week before with adults either. Maybe he only works well with the mirrored pep-talks. The meals are served on color-coated plates. The children start chanting that they want food.

Dave is trying to convince the children that the polenta is actually a sandwich. I can’t even get my 5-year-old to like crust. If he can get eighty kids to like polenta he does better with kids then he thinks he does! He tells them that they are cute and calls himself the one armed bandit.

Ariel realizes she picked the right dish and just starts calling it lasagna. This might work against her, because they might compare it to the lasagna mommy makes; eggplant is a little gooier then pasta.

Kevin is now calling his dish sweet and sour vegetables. He thinks it might be a hard sell, but I would think not pretending it is something they know would be a smart move.

You see lots of spitting back out into the napkin and shocked faces as they taste the food. After they vote, Chef Ramsay gives them a bag of sweets and treats. The bags are complete with those little poppers that shoot out confetti and streamers. If I had to guess, the losers might be cleaning a dining room today.

40% of the kids voted Kevin’s dish their least favorite; that’s a big percentage, but it was loaded with beats. Dave and Tennille are the top two dishes. The winner received 55% of the positive vote and is Tennille. I like Tennille and have since day one. Poor Dave is disappointed that again he came in second, always the bridesmaid never the bride.

I was right, the losers will be cleaning up the dining room; it’s a mess. Tennille is rewarded with a morning of Beverly Hills pampering followed up with a lunch date with Chef Ramsay.

The other chefs are just knocking Tennille. They believe that she won because she cooks elementary food suited for the tastes of a child. Sour grapes are so unattractive. They don’t think she will feel comfortable in the upscale Beverly Hills. Honestly, this is just ugly and mean spirited.


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