So it’s zombie meets crazy people on tonight’s episode of Scare Tactics as the show does what it does best and scares the life out of people. The show features a victim, an accomplice and the freakout that tends to do more than just freak some people out.
On tonight’s episode, we start off with Leah who wants to scare her friend Kristie and put her outside of her comfort zone. In true “Scare Tactics” style, they have something quite obscure planned for Kristie. Why do these folks accept these crazy jobs? Are there no normal jobs? Kristie is led into a room, assisted by Lauren. THe room looks condemned, and a random vagrant shows up advising Kristie that it is a portal to a domain. Lauren tells Kristie there is black mold or maybe the plague. It could happen, right?
Blood begins coming out the wall, and Kristie stands there with her clipboard looking rather dumbfounded, as a construction worker advises in a CSI tone that blood is coming out of the wall. The crazy man enters the room, a pentagram is lit on fire, and Kristie is being offered up as a sacrifice. The crazy man watches the walls bleed, and Kristie is shaking while he asks if she is scared, because he wants to put her on Scare Tactics.
You watch these people enter these strange rooms that resemble something out of a Hostel film and they just go along with it. Scare Tactics makes the scenarios entertaining, but also teaches you what not to do. For instance don’t go with strangers and don’t accept a job in a room with walls that bleed; it should be a simple rule of thumb.
Our next victim is Gil, with his friend Giovanni entering him in Scare Tactics as a lab worker who will be testing medication that makes the male organ increase by five inches. So gullible, poor Gil, he should have run right out of the room. Bridgette enters the room, and Gil and Nathan are asked to give their arousal level as they look at random strange pictures of fruit and vegetables. Brigitte removes her lab coat to show a revealing ensemble and then a bikini. Really? Why don’t Gil and Nathan get up there and strip? Nathan begins to whine in pain while watching Bridgette strip.
Nathan keels over in pain, and blood is running down his legs. Gil begins flipping out, advising that he did not sign any papers. The lab tech tells him that the same thing will happen to him unless she does one thing and that is to put him on Scare Tactics. Gil seems freaked out as he watches Nathan on the floor bleeding. He is a good sport, though, despite this problematic situation for him.
We have exploding organs, strange rooms, and people in lab coats who sound more like actors than real doctors, and yet no one questions anything. Remind me not to trust my friends if they offer me a job!
Halloween always brings out the best in people, so adding a few zombies to the show is always a plus. Jeffrey is next, and his cousin Emily is putting him on the show to get back at him. Jeffrey believes in the supernatural and has a love of law enforcement. The crime being committed here is by zombies. Why do they always have to blame the zombies?
Jeffrey arrives at the makeshift crime scene, and a waitress comes out and begins crying, telling them how unreal and crazy it was. There was fighting, and now they need the crime scene unit to come in. Jeffrey and the cop find what looks like ribs, but I am not so sure. Where is Dr. Hannibal Lector or George Romero when you need them? The cop finds a drooling man who looks a little walking dead-ish and begins to attack and bite the cop while Jeffrey and the waitress stand there.
Jeffrey is just going over details of what the zombies are doing with a slight smirk on his face, and the zombies begin to ask if he is scared. He says yes! The zombies inform him he is on Scare Tactics. He takes it with a grain of salt, but advises he will be getting Emily back, so watch out Emily!
The next victim is Joey who does not trust the government (does anyone really?). His friend Ashley is setting him up to appear in an abandoned military warehouse to film TRUTHISODES, because the government is lying!
Joey happily volunteers and is joined by a cameraman and an interviewer. They start in the strange-looking elevator. Joey discovers pictures of bloody babies. It looks like a place you should not even go into without the military. Joey winds up in the dark and mentions right away that he is scared. They discover a new room with what appears to be a dead body, and the interviewer announces they are finding things they are not supposed to find.
Joey announces whatever it is, he is not touching it, nor does he want anything to do with the dead body that the interviewer uncovers. The interviewer pulls the sheet back, and the body comes to life and begins choking him. Two scary security guards offer to make Joey forget what he saw and offer to use some scare tactics on him. He says no way! The security guards advise that scare tactics would be the best thing for him, because he is on Scare Tactics. These poor folks are put through torment; maybe they could visit Dr. Phil afterwards.
The next group is being scared of their minds. Sofia believes she lives in a haunted house. Her cousin Haben is setting her up because he is psychic. Okay fair enough. It is just like Ghost Hunters, only Tracy and the crew scare the ghosts. A cameraman and makeshift ghost hunter instruct Sofia to write down anything she sees or feels, and Sofia announces that she is really scared as the fellow ghost hunter goes along with her and tells her how scared he is.
Sofia sits and looks paranoid. They all hear something. It sounds like bad plumbing, but who am I? I am not a plumber. Sofia announces that the ghost is communicating now and begins asking questions. The ghost hunter is going for a filter and needs to document what he sees. Sofia is giving the ghost direct commands. They spot something strange, and the lights begin to go crazy. Sofia begins crying. The ghost hunter asks if she is scared bringing laughter as they tell her her cousin set her up! Good job, scaring the crap out of the poor girl. But it’s all in good fun and Tracy Morgan makes it funny! Who could say no to Tracy Morgan? No one!
Amanda is the next victim. She is a fan of scary movies, and her friend Holly is setting her up. The scenario is that someone is trying to create super soldiers. Really, didn’t Dolph Lundgren and Jean Claude Van-Damme do this already in Universal Soldiers, or maybe The Terminator? Amanda is in this abandoned building, and a man comes out asking Amanda if she is a spy. She begins to panic.
The man in the building unveils that the machine he is hooked up to is keeping him alive, and if they shut it off he will die. The man dramatically acts like he is dying and turning into a smaller version of The Terminator. The man begins asking if Amanda is scaring her technology. She tries to explain that there is no way she is here to work. The lab tech tells her she\’s right. She\’s actually here for Scare Tactics. Amanda announces needs a cigarette and thinks of the movie Saw and what could have happened.
Danny is setting his friend Carlo up, and the man next door has a bit of a temper. Carlo is helping out with some construction. There is always a crazy person somewhere, oh and a hidden body! Carlo is by himself as the manager leaves, and a man comes in acting rather agitated. He asks what they are doing, and Carlo tries to explain what is happening. The man begins to flip and Carlo is laughing nervously and the builder tries to explain that they are here to do their job.
They begin to tear the wall down, and out pops a body. Yeah bodies always pop out of walls. It is common … really! The landlord comes back in and is flipping out, but is more concerned about the hole in the wall. He realizes there is a person with a bloody head coming out of the wall. They explain to Carlo that there is a reason to be scared, because his laughing self is on “Scare Tactics.” He thought he was playing “Halo” for a second. Nope, don’t think so!
I love the thought process these people go into. They wind up in the strangest places and try and rationalize these moments. Danny has no experience in the medical field, so that is why he will be attempting to play a doctor on television. Danny’s friend Mike is setting him up to make him cry \”like a little bitch.\” Nice friend, isn’t he? An actor playing a doctor is going over the information with Danny who is about to meet the tech Travis, and it causes steroid rage. This is going to be good. The Incredible Hulk meets psycho people.
The tech goes over the information with the fake patient, explaining that the medication causes rage. Danny gets some information from another patient who tells him he was a former cage fighter. The tech is taking money from the patient and cutting Danny in on the money. The patient keeps asking for more and more and begins to flip out. He needs to be restrained as he leaps out of bed and begins chasing Danny. He stabs a fellow patient and kills the doctor. Can anyone say run for your life, Danny? The patient is still screaming and Danny panics.
Danny tries to calm the patient down as he panics more, then the patient asks if he is scared. He is told he should be, because he is on Scare Tactics. Danny’s level of paranoia goes from high to low. He is still shaken, but not one hundred percent stirred. Danny wonders what the hell kind of medical office it is. Mike enters and laughs with his friend.
As always, Tracy advises to watch your back because you never know when the crew of Scare Tactics will be heading your way! For now, you can watch next week’s episode on the Syfy channel, Monday at 9/8c. Happy Hauntings everyone.