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And THIS Is Why I Love Reality TV: Denise Richards Redefines Complexity

First, I’d like to welcome myself back from my long hiatus. After all those VHDumb dating shows wrapped, I needed a break. My brain was fried and I was tired of dry heaving over my puke pail. I’m back in action now. Hooray for me and the return of ATIWILRT. My only regret in taking so long in my return is that Farmer Wants A Wife has already finished up its season. Apologies to its lone fan who wanted me to recap it. You know who you are, you and your fake email address.

Secondly, here’s a warning: I’m changing format a bit. My last group of columns all ended with my tag of And THIS is why….with a bit of a summary that pinpoints exactly why I’m writing. Yeah, well, that’s not gonna be there any more because I figure the entire column is why I love reality tv. It’ll work, trust me, we’ll be fine. We’re in this together so hold on for the ride, especially this week. It’s a doozy.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you in my debut new format column: [b]Denise Richards: It’s Complicated.[/b]

I will hold here for a moment while you finish up with the incessant laughter.

I’m not writing about the show to mock Denise Richards as a person or to further slander her or to take sides in the messy divorce or to bring up the fact of how dumb it was to marry a man who was client Numero Uno for a high class call girl service. I’m writing about Denise Richards: It’s Complicated because I could not stop watching the mini-marathon that aired this past weekend. Every time I turned on E!, there was Denise Richards, as complicated as ever. Of course, here, complicated means ordinary and quite simple.

It’s really not that complicated. Most of the episodes focus on very mundane things. Denise Richards goes to therapy to better herself. Denise Richards needs to have a stern talking-to with her personal assistant because he lies (how complicated is your life, really, when you have a personal assistant?). Denise Richards goes to Mommy And Me. Denise Richards goes shopping. Denise Richards gets career advice from a Hollywood mogul. Denise Richards was in Playboy. Denise Richards is an aunt. Denise Richards plays sexy roles. Denise Richards is a model. Denise Richards takes her dad to a spa.

Stop me when you are overwhelmed with complications.

I honestly do not have any problem with the show other than the title. Sure, many people probably do not find her show interesting one bit. In fact, there’s no reason they should. It’s very ordinary. The only thing that may make it interesting is that Denise Richards is in it and a lot of people (read MEN) like Denise Richards. I have a feeling that many homes across this great land tune in to Denise Richards—It’s Complicated and switch the volume to mute. This show would not air if it were anyone not famous because it’s about a woman doing chores and going to appointments. It’s not complicated.

Here are some suggestions for the title if it’s not too late:

Denise Richards: It’s That Simple

Denise Richards: I’m Hot

Denise Richards: Watch Me On Mute or With The Volume Turned Up Because Either Way You Get The Same Thing Out Of The Show

Denise Richards: Model, Actress, Mom, Woman, Female

Denise Richards: I Do Stuff

The best part of the show is her dad. I love love love her dad. Really, if E! decided to do a show about her dad and take her out of it, I’d probably want to watch it more. They could call it: Irv Ain’t Complicated. He really isn’t. He’s very supportive, kind, generous, and smart. He’s also a riot. Denise Richards makes him get his ears waxed and fake tan so he can be her date to some glamorous shindig. He winds up carrying heavy stuff and crunching numbers to help her out. Irv is fabulous.

With a dad like Irv, nothing can be so complicated. Sure the divorce is messy, but the show isn’t about the divorce. I’m sure lots of people wish it were. I’m happy it’s not because that crap doesn’t need to be in the tabloids and on the air more than it already is. Oh, I forgot to mention, the opening credits of the show is different shots of Denise Richards with labels written on the screen like whore and mommy. Really, it’s a montage of virgin/demon-woman. Still, with all the name-calling and labeling, things are pretty simple. It’s not complicated; it’s life.

Do you love Irv as much as I do? Email me by clickin my envelope (that still cracks me up when I say that). Chat in the forums, too.

You can also[b] [url=http://christinamrau.blogspot.com]Live The Dream[/url] [/b]with me or [b][url=http://www.xanga.com/getmoregossipgirl]Get More Gossip Girl[/url] [/b]when you watch the reruns of the best thing on tv that’s not reality.


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