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Hell’s Kitchen 4, Premiere – Something Wicked this Way Comes and Makes Gordon Throw Up


10. Sharon is a room service chef and her dish looks like something room service would deliver. I’m not even sure what protein that was.

11. Ben the electrician’s dish is “not bad” but boring.

12. Cristina is a culinary student and should have stayed in school. Her dish is good in theory but terrible in execution.

13. Next up is Frodo from Middle Earth. I mean LouRoss, a hotel cook, and he has a mediocre dish.

14. We now have pan seared halibut with a vegetable hash and it’s the tastiest thing he’s had all day. Its’ deemed the best dish by a mile. It’s Vanessa, our line cook.

15. The Black Gordon Ramsay is last. He is cockeyed and tells Gordon he can call him Chef Bobby. It’s Hawaiian Butter fish with Roasted Red Pepper Sauce. He cooked the fish in the deep fat fryer… oh my. It’s lazy but he still believes he’s a four star general both in the streets and in the kitchen.

Gordon is wondering if he has the chef to head his London LA restaurant. LouRoss spits some ghetto gobbledy goop that I can’t understand even with captions. Jason, who is 29, thinks he’ll have to beat women off with a stick if he wins Hell’s Kitchen. My prediction is women will beat him with a stick after Gordon Ramsay does. This year there’s a twist: a captain is not appointed for each team (Boys and Girls). The teams have to pick their own captain. This should be fun.

The girls choose Vanessa unanimously because she prepared a tasty dish. The men are struggling. Everyone wants to be captain. The women have moved on to memorizing the menu and playbook. The men are still trying to pick a captain. Big mouthed Bobby wins because he has a big mouth. No one on the Boys team studies. Spooky night vision gives us unnecessary shots of people snoring and drooling.

Bobby emerges as a pretty competent leader and they become cocky. Vanessa is missing as leader on the girls side. The girls are going too slow and people are starting to trip and fall in the kitchen. Tonight should be the best night ever… should be. The boys have not looked at the menu and they don’t know the entrees. All of the girls are standing with their hands up. Anyone with reservations should bring a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with them. Gordon is starting a slow simmer. He finally looks to the girls and they are able to resolve the entrees flawlessly. This gives the girls a lot confidence. The guys are still cool.

Gordon announces that he’s created a tableside amuse bouche. Petrozza and Shayna will be serving tableside. Guests are let in giddily believing they’re going to get a meal. One of the boys has gone missing: cut to Jason smoking and playing with his feet. The kitchens are off and running. The tableside chefs are preparing flambé. The bitchiness is starting with the girls already. It’s the appetizers and the risotto is already giving issues. It’s like rice pudding. Sharon is floundering.

Jason brings his first appetizer and it tastes really bad. The scallops are thrown away. No one is eating beyond the amuse bouche. Bobby is not supporting his team; he feels as long as he’s in the clear its “all good”.

Sharon tries to remake the risotto but makes it too garlicky. He tells her to go put some more make up on and he puts the Flavor of Love girl in charge of risotto. Jean Phillipe is offering wine, bread, water, and smiles to the hungry crowd. He’ll be lynched for sure. On the boys side, there’s risotto issues too. Jason is too high to cook risotto. Gordon makes him sit down and eat the entire pot of risotto. Petrozza is making flambé to keep them happy and telling lame jokes. Jean Phillipe tries to hurry him along.

Flavor of Love girl is turning over appetizers in the kitchen but apparently she’s flipped the quail eggs wrong and Gordon starts to melt down. He removes Vanessa as captain and makes Roseanne the new captain. She takes over and Flavor of Love girl is wondering why she wasn’t picked. On the boys side, Dominic is unable to cook scallops probably because he’s a stay at home Dad and who’s serving kids scallops? Gordon is having a meltdown AGAIN and Bobby is still trying to remove himself from leadership.

In the red kitchen, they’ve finally managed a proper risotto. Flavor of Love girl does a ghetto dance and the red restaurant is able to eat something besides amuse bouche. I can’t tell if the food is good or whether they’re just hungry.

On the blue side Gordon throws some green snot around and kicks over a bin. Frodo tells people they need to make love to the kitchen and Bobby is told to give his captain’s badge to Frodo. Bobby still thinks he’s a general. I think he smoked some of Jason’s weed. The red kitchen is off and running with their first entrees and apparently chicken is harder to cook than I thought. GR throws chicken against the wall. Frodo has moved the kitchen along and Jason has come down from his high enough to cook but it’s too late as the restaurant has emptied.
Gordon shuts it down and we are looking at an empty restaurant and a disgusted cabbage face. Everyone looks dejected and tired.

  • Bobby was a coward
  • Jason sunk the kitchen
  • Vanessa was like having a mouse on service
  • Corey cooked rubber chicken

Nevertheless the losing kitchen is the men’s kitchen. Frodo has to pick the people up for elimination. Frodo starts the interviews of how people feel they did. He nominates Bobby because he was captain but then he disappeared; he then nominates Dominic or Mr. Mom because he couldn’t keep the pace. Gordon is not sure what to say to either.

Dominic wants to stay because he feels he was misguided and had no direction but he binned 30 scallops. Bobby feels he should stay and I’m not sure what he says. Gordon wants to cut the BS and asks if he did a good job as captain – he honestly replies no. Dominic is sent back to the fam bam.


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