Dick goes out for a smoke and they talk about the movies they’ve been allowed to watch tonight. He says he almost fell asleep during the first movie. It’s back to talking about HGs, as he says the funniest Jameka moment was her calling his momma a bitch. Carol’s funniest moment was dancing around like a princess, and Jen’s funniest moment was when she destroyed all Dick’s smokes during her meltdown. Zach’s funniest moment was talking about all his inventions, and the funnies Kail moment was when she got a massager in her HoH basket, and she asked why she got a vibrator. Well, apparently people thought that would loosen you up a little! Both he and Dani agree the first few days they thought Eric was the funniest person in the house.
For Dani, her funniest Carol moment was falling asleep with Mike, then saying she missed the touch of a man. Eric’s funniest moment was when he screamed like a girl when Dani scared him coming out of the SR. She can’t remember any funny Amber moments (what about that braided hairstyle?), but the funniest Jess moment was her talking about how much she hated Kail. The funniest Mike moment was him dressing like a maid.
Done with the funny moments, Dick and Dani now discuss the stupid things every one did. Dick says that for Kail it was her rolling over on her alliance, Jameka the magic ping pong ball and not playing for five HoHes, Nick not trying to stay, Carol not want to be there, Eric playing too many sides, Amber being an emotional wreck, Joe playing too hard too fast, Jen her brain, Dustin being too confident (this is beginning to sound like the other rounds of the game), Jess getting cocky after winning two HoHes, Mike aligning too fast, and Zach getting extremely cocky and arrogant at the end. Dani says hers were pretty much the same. Kail telling too many lies,
Moving on, it’s time for the most ridiculous statements by each HG. For Kail, Dani’s first one is that Zach is a mastermind, and Dick mentions when she told him he could change the vote to keep her there. For Jameka, Dani thinks it was the magic ping pong ball or saying right before she left that she had been playing UTR. For Dick it has to be “Yo momma is a bitch!” Dani thanks Nick’s would be, “I’m a new Nick.” For Carol, Dani thinks it would be her saying she was a bad secret keeper, and Dick thinks it would be her saying she didn’t want to be there. Again, these are getting repetitive, making them boring. For Eric, Dani says it was him saying he ad been playing at a 1, but could go up to a 10. Huh? For Amber, Dani thinks it’s either her telling Nick to stop talking to her as it would be better or her mom having a vision of her being in the final 2. For Dick it was her saying she had a vision Dick was mad when she won something and saying she loved her dog as much as her daughter. For Joe, Dick thinks it would be him telling Dick they could go a long way in the game together. For Jen, Dani thinks it would be when she said the Nick would be happy her and Dani were talking, and for Dick it would be her saying she ate on slop because she was mad at BB. For Dustin, Dani says it would be him telling people they didn’t raise their hand, but telling Jessica she was allowed to speak. For Dick, it’s Dustin saying there was a line in the sand to not trust the Donatos. For Jess, Dani thinks it was her saying she went with her heart, and Dick thinks it’s her saying she’s not just another Holly. For Mike, Dani says it would be Mike saying he was loyal to his alliance. For Zach, Dick thinks it was when he admitted to being a chess player now that the strategy part was over, and they both agree about the line where he said he was the muscle, and him saying Jameka helped him rediscover his faith.
As if all this wasn’t enough, they come up up with another topic that is pretty much the same as all the others, as now for this one , it’s the most ridiculous actions. For Kail, Dike thinks it was her not peeing for ten hours, and Dani thinks it was her falling off the pedestal after ten seconds. For Amber, Dani thinks it was letting Jameka braid her hair, and Dick thinks it was either holding the rat like a baby or kissing her necklace 24/7. For Jen, Dani thinks it’s her shoving her swimsuits up her butt and checking it out in the mirror all the time.
Now it’s one possession they would burn from each HG, and it’s 5 AM. Can these two just go to bed already? For Kail, Dick says he’d burn Jen. Bahahaha. I think he already did. He then says her bathing suit, and Dani thinks her bunny ears, but Dick instead would super glue them to her ears. For Jameka, Dick would burn her fake hair, and Dani her pants. For Nick, Dani would burn his pink swim trunks, and Dick agrees. For Carol, Dick would burn her socks, and Dani would burn her granny panties. For Eric Dick would burn his pants, and Dani all his shirts, especially the human one, but Dick would want to burn the hungry hungry hippo one. For Amber, the ugly sweatpants that hid how fat her ass was, for Dani it would be the lemon bowers. For Joe, Dick would burn the shorts he would roll up and down and show his pubes. Eww. For Jen, Dani would burn all the Jen shirts, and Dick wants them to shove them up her … well, you get the idea. Dick thinks that was the first sign she was mentally unstable. For Zach it would have to be his DolphinCrash t-shirts.
Thankfully, this game ends. Dani goes in to tweeze her eyebrows, and Dick sits outside having a smoke. Hearing a bird, he asks why a bird is up and tells the “MF” that all his friends are sleeping. Oh Good God, they’re now coming up with slogans for each HG. Kail’s would be the Mayor of Rainbow Town, Jameka’s would be Dick’s Momma Is a Bitch or Hair Freak, Nick’s would be I’m a New Nick or Smitten Kitten, Carol’s would mention the $5 or be Dancing Drama Queen, and Eric’s would be You’re Lucky It’s a Fast Forward Week or Crazy-Eyed Person. For Amber it would be The Bottle Never Lies; I Went Home on Thursday or Whamber. Dani says she just came up with it herself, not knowing all of America has been calling Amber that for months. For Joe it would be I’m a Lobster or Awkward! For Jen it would be Memememe or I Was Mad at BB. Jess’ of course would be Booyah! Mike’s would be Meat Log, and Zach’s would be FSA or Ogre.