Kail flutters over to Mike, asking him if he thinks she should give Dick hints about the alliance and Nick. Mike really and truly doesn’t care. Kail moves on to Daniele and asks her who the nominees are going to be. Daniele says she doesn’t know, but she’s sure that Dick will let everyone know when he decides. Kail asks Daniele to ask her father not to “blast” her any more. She agrees.
Guess what? Daniele is eating again! Ice cream and cookies this time.
Now Kail’s chasing Mike again, telling him that Zach approached her on day two and asked her for a two-person alliance. She refused at that time, until she had Mike and Nick on board and then went for a four-person deal. Now she thinks that Zach was unhappy without a two-person alliance, and went ahead and made that with Nick. Now the two of them are against her. Whatever. She wants to go and tell Dustin all about this, and asks Mike if he wants to come with her. He doesn’t, of course, so off Kail goes to find her next victim.
Kail finds Dustin with Amber, so they’re both going to get the Kail Show apparently. She starts off asking them what their definition of alliance is. She offers that it’s either a best friend, a commitment, or a hand shake. Dustin looks confused and says it could be any or all of those things, as long as there’s an agreement. Kail starts talking fast, saying that she and Jen are best friends in the house, but they don’t have an alliance. She had an alliance with three other guys, but two of them have betrayed her and Mike. She says that this could affect Dustin and Amber’s alliance, but they deny that there is an alliance. Why do I get the feeling that there’s going to be a lot of repetition here?
Amber wants to know why Kail would commit to an alliance so early in the game. She says she was approached, which I guess is a good enough answer. She says that she went after Dick for the benefit of her alliance, not just herself, but her alliance didn’t back her. She won’t mention Nick and Zach by name, but it doesn’t matter because Amber already knows all the details, and I’m pretty sure Dustin has it figured out by now too. Kail says that they all shook hands and agreed on the alliance, but the others just didn’t back her. See, repetition already. She mentions a bunch of names that could have been the extra vote to make it a tie, thereby revealing Nick and Zach as the only other two people who she could be talking about. Boy, she’s pretty darned clever.
Kail wants to know what she should do now, since Dick is after her and two members of her alliance, who she shook hands with, are betraying her. She wonders who she should call them out to. Amber asks why the rest of the alliance wasn’t campaigning with her if Dick was actually out to get them all. Kail says that she was working the house, while Mike was trying to work the rest of the alliance. She repeats her claim that “someone” wanted a two-person alliance with her but she said no, and then sought out Mike instead. Which contradicts her earlier claim that she was approached, but no one catches that.
Amber asks Kail for some time to talk to Mike before she will give her any advice on this. Who the hell knows why – it’s not like it’s earth-shattering to anyone in the house. Who’ll be surprised? Dick? Maybe a little, but not enough to take any heat off of Kail. Why does it even matter that Kail’s own alliance betrayed her? It doesn’t change a single thing that she’s done over the last few days. She was aware that Nick and Zach weren’t on board with her plan, but she was relentless in trying to get Dick out anyway. She doesn’t seem to realize that an alliance has to work around everyone involved, not just one person’s personal agenda.
Kail leaves and Amber tells Dustin that the two people Kail was referring to are Nick and Zach. They start whispering about the Mrs. Robinson alliance, but now they’re using their colour-coded houseguest names and I really don’t know who is who. Zach and Nick are gold and orange, I think, but I don’t know which one is which. I think the gist of it is that they hate Kail, and that Zach had no idea that Nick was working both sides. But I could be wrong.
Kail is back to Mike now, saying that she’s positive the two of them are going up together, and that Jen will be the replacement nominee in case the veto is used. Mike is mad at himself for messing up the tie-breaker question because usually he’s good at math. Kail says that Zach should be the one to go home this week because he betrayed them. Argh! Kail, Zach did not betray Dick, who is the current HoH, and who doesn’t give a royal crap if someone in your alliance didn’t do what you wanted them to do. Why does this not sink in? We’ve all been bagging on Jen for being egotistical, but Kail isn’t much better.
Amber finds Nick and tells him about the conversation she had with Kail. He says he’s already told everyone that matters, except for Dick, about the alliance and how he doesn’t want to be a part of it. Amber says that Kail probably wants to go out fighting, and that she’s planning to out Nick to Dick. She adds that Jen still thinks that Nick is playing Daniele, and that she’s been encouraging Jen to think that even though she knows that Nick is in love with her. Nick says whoa, love is a strong word – he just likes Daniele a lot.
As this is going on, Dustin is telling Kail and Silent Mike that they need to talk to the other two people in their alliance and come to some kind of understanding. Kail says she can’t because they will lie. She talks a lot, but she’s repeating herself so we’ll just skip the details. She says that the rest of the house will be shocked, SHOCKED! to find out who the fourth person in the alliance is. Is there anyone in the house that doesn’t know? Kail admits that she’s upset because her alliance isn’t fighting to keep her in the house. Get a grip Kail, Dick only won HoH a few hours ago.
Dick comes in the room, and after a bit of small talk, Dustin and Kail leave. Dustin tells her that she wouldn’t be in this spot if she hadn’t been so determined to get Dick out last week, especially since she was leading a one-woman crusade. Amber is the next victim of Tropical Storm Kail, but their conversation (which is more Kail rehash) is cut short by Jen walking in still wearing only a towel. After Jen leaves, Kail says she’s a victim here and got played by her own alliance. She says she took one for the team. Uh, no, because your “team” wasn’t part of the whole 48-hour, non-stop, get Dick out of the house rampage. That was all you, Kail, and it was all because you went off the deep end and let paranoia take over.
Jameka gets called to the Diary Room, and while she’s in there Daniele and Eric write “Happy Birthday Jameka” on the table in condiments or that body paint they got or something – it’s colourful though, so we’ll go with body paint for now. They also whip up a batch of microwaved slop just for Jameka, which I’m sure she’ll appreciate. It’s still half an hour before it’s officially Jameka’s birthday, but this is sweet. She thinks so too when she comes out of the DR. There’s lots of chatter going on, and overall the house is much more animated than it has been the last few nights.
Jessica dares Eric to lick the word “Jameka” off the table without lifting his tongue. She says if he can do it, she’ll lick some paint off of him. Eric, of course, accepts the challenge, and says that if he succeeds, she’ll have to lick the paint off his nipples, belly button, or penis. He’s pretty happy about this idea, as I’m sure you can imagine. He is indeed successful in licking up the word “Jameka” in one swoop (you can insert your own licking jokes throughout – the rest of the hamsters sure did!) and Jessica chooses his nipples.