Suddenly Kail is on a rant to Mike, saying that they have to get Amber out this week. She has too many connections in the house which is dangerous, and this is their only chance to take her out. Mike is a good little sheep and goes to Nick with the new plan. Nick’s fine with it. So now it’s clear that Kail is the driving force behind the alliance, and that she’s prone to changing her mind and panicking. Things are not looking good for the Mrs. Robinson crew.
But wait! Mike goes to talk to Zach (after cleaning the bathroom – swoon) and Zach is not on board with taking Amber out. Mike agrees with him, and figures that having Amber and Dustin on their side can only help them in the game. Of course Zach already has something worked out with Amber that she owes him down the line for keeping her this week. But Mike doesn’t need to know that.
We get a few shots of Jessica and Jen showering together, in their bikinis, in the HoH room. At the same time, Dick and Eric are showering at the same time in the regular bathroom, and Eric announces that “it’s gay time.” Heehee.
Mike returns to Mrs. Robinson and tells her that the boys have a deal with Amber and Dustin to take Joe out next, so they want to stay true to their end of the deal and keep Amber this week. Kail is upset because she wants Dustin out before Joe, but goes along with Mike and agrees that Carol will go this week. As if she has any choice. She then tells him that she’s not making deals with other people in the house, so the boys have to protect her. Wow. When did Kail start turning into Maggie?
Back to the boys showering, and Dick opens the door on Eric, then runs off laughing. The cameras get nothing – no naked Eric. Not that I’m disappointed, mind you. Just pointing that out. If it’s nudity you’re after, however, we do get treated to a nice shot of Dick’s butt as he’s getting dressed. Lucky us. Dick meets up with Jen in the kitchen. He’s laughing and tells her that Showtime might have gotten an eyeful of Eric this evening. Jen says no way – she and Jessica were showering together upstairs, so the cameras must have been on them. Oy.
Eric threatens to open the door to the toilet next time Dick is in there (no, please don’t do that), and Dick says that he hasn’t laughed as much as he has in this house in a long time.
Joe is getting ready for story time. Again. This little ritual is more annoying than date night. At least I can tune in to most of the conversation on date night and try to pick up some funny bits here and there. Story time? Makes me completely tune out and nod off. Tonight Joe is wearing a hat and scarf. No idea why.
Dick agrees with me, and says that story time is boring but making Eric crawl around the bottom of the shower is funny. Yeah Dick, you got that right. He’s sitting by himself in the backyard, having a smoke and talking to himself. It’s way too early for this – where is everyone? You can’t tell me that they’re all partaking in Joe’s lame story time. Dick is really good at the smoke ring thing. Just thought I’d throw that out there. He says that there must be some trouble he can get into somewhere, and heads back inside. Yay.
Lots of shots of Dick puttering about, getting another beer. He wonders if the others are mad at him or something. There’s a group in the bedroom listening to Joe’s story, but where did everyone else go? Dick goes back outside and tidies up out there. Boy do I ever love all these guys cleaning up all the time.
Finally Dustin comes outside and asks Dick if he’s the only one not listening to stories. Yay for Dustin! And then, mercifully, BB breaks up story time because Joe is using copyrighted tales. Woohoo! Not that I mind watching Dick wander around, but it’s not all that much fun when he thinks everyone is mad at him.
Joe is heartbroken, because he feels like he really makes connections with people through his stories. He makes eye contact with them, and really shares pieces of himself. Good grief. Jameka is upset because she had a waffle in the fridge and someone ate it. Dustin comes in and meekly admits that he ate the waffle. Come on people, let’s step up the entertainment factor here.
Jessica walks by Eric, who is sitting on a stool, and tries to shake him off of it. He doesn’t exactly fall, but catches his ankle on something and it’s bleeding. He seems to be riding the fine line between being upset and laughing it off.
Ah, there’s booze. Good. Eric and Mike are talking about wrestling each other. Jen is talking to Joe and she mentions that she knows Booger. Heh – she seems proud of this. Joe, who has momentarily taken over as America’s Player, tells Jen that he hates that guy. She tries to recover by mentioning that she knows Drew too. Hey Jen, maybe you could complete the trifecta and tell us that you know Maggie as well.
Instead, she decides to tell everyone that she wasn’t sequestered during finals before moving into the house. Which is baloney, but Dustin believes her and is quite put out.
Dustin goes over to the hammock with Joe, and they’re having a bit of a spat about respect issues. Joe says that Dustin is afraid of making a commitment because he wants his life to be in order first, but he has to realize that life is full of changes and surprises … do you really want to hear all of this? I didn’t think so.
Jen and Eric have a wrestling match, which Jen wins. Heh. She really nailed him. He tells everyone that he let her win, but no one believes him. Meanwhile, Daniele is sleeping in Nick’s bed, with Nick on the floor beside her.
Jen starts ranting about her picture again, saying that she was told that they would photoshop it and make it look good. Hee! She admits they have to photoshop her picture to make her look good. I love it. She then says that she makes a lot of money by being paid to go to parties so that they have a pretty girl there. Are you kidding me? Did Booger tell her to say that? ‘Cause this whole thing reeks of Boog.
Assorted hamsters are heading off to bed now. Nonexistent Carol, Kail, Nick, Daniele, etc. All sleeping. Dick and Joe are outside talking, and Dick tells Joe that if he wins HoH he won’t put Joe on the block, straight up. They talk about alliances forming, and Joe thinks there’s only one obvious alliance in the house. Wow, I thought this one was supposed to be clever.
Dick returns to the kitchen, where he mentions a couple of things to Jen – the lie about Nick trying to kiss her, and seeking attention by working out so much. But he doesn’t do it in a confrontational way, it’s sneaky. She tries to blow it all off by telling him that she and Kail watched him decorate the topiaries one night on the spy cam.
Here’s a first – Dick says he’s tired and heads off for bed. While there are still other people awake in the house. Wow. I’m not sure what to say. It’s like the whole Big Brother universe has suddenly morphed and changed the way it rotates. Okay, so being over-dramatic isn’t my thing. But it is rather strange.
The only two left now to watch are quiet Mike and obnoxious JenderNeutral. (I totally need to start up my own t-shirt line here.) Jen talks about how the dishes aren’t done, but doesn’t make a move to actually wash them. Mike says that people need to start pitching in and pulling their weight or they’ll become targets in the house. The sound you hear is Mike’s comment flying quickly over Jenial’s head.
Speaking of sound, DeJenerate thiks that those of us with the feeds can only see them but not hear them. Oh for crying out loud. How can someone who was apparently coached by Chill Town not know that we can hear the hamsters? For a split second I wonder if the clueless thing is an act, but then I remember that Jen isn’t that good an actor. Mike sets her straight about the feeds.
Jen runs off at the mouth for a while, but Mike is obviously exhausted and takes the first opportunity he gets to leave and head for the bathroom. Jen follows, and a few minutes later everyone is in their beds and out for the night. Whew. The only problem is that the topiaries are sadly unadorned.
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