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Freelance entertainment writer, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.

The Amazing Race All Stars, April 22nd – Teletubbies Go to War With a GPS


The beauty queens, Eric/Danielle, and Oswald/Danny all decide on Engine Care, while Charla and Mirna decide on Care Package, with Charla saying it’s because she likes to help people in need, but last time they were required to do a project such as the Engine Care, Charla had a hard time reaching what needed to be bolted down, and they needed to find a stool for her, wasting valuable time, so this is most likely the truer reason why they’re doing Care Package.

Mirna appears to be once again out of her mind as they hurry. She’s asking Charla to please run, telling her it’s for a million dollars. As they begin to load the supplies, Charla picks up what looks to be a huge bag of dog food, and it’s nearly as big as she is. The guide that stands by watching them “encourages” Mirna to put it in with love, and not to just throw it in there like it’s garbage. Danny and Oswald think washing the engine pod is harder than packing the boxes, but realize they’re there and shouldn’t stay. The sergeant is yells to them to get all the parts clean to the chrome. Mirna is running books back and forth, loading them into the box and in one of her hurried dialogues like when she talked to the “clutterbug,” she says that books are really important, as they help you out in life.

As Mirna and Charla reach 300 pounds of supplies and tape up the box, the beauty queens are being told to not miss a spot, and the declared that cleaning the engine is exhausting (no pun intended, I’m sure). Dustin says her forearms are getting a little tired. Danny and Oswald are told to not forget underneath, and they say again there is no turning back. Eric tells Danielle to hurry up for the second time on this leg, and as Mirna boards the airplane for the drop, she says it’s the best thing she’s ever done in her life. She adds she feels like Top Gun, and thinks in the huge plane, she and Charla look like little ants as she gets out her motion sickness bag.

Dustin and Kandice think they’re done, but the sergeant points out some spots. While they think it’s just rusty, he tells them to keep going. Kandice says there was no charming the sergeant, as he was all about business and they were getting nowhere with their smiles. They still had to scrub. Danielle realizes they’re going to need to be able to eat off the wing for it to be approved, and she devises a plan to wet the wing and engine pod down while Eric scrubs. Oswald and Danny think they’re done, but the sergeant points out a a few more spots.

Charla and Mirna are told to prepare for the plane to go into a nosedive putting them in zero gravity, and Mirna says all that matters is that she has her barf bag. As she and Charla do the sign of the cross and are screaming, they make the nose dive, and the plane opens up to make the drop, making them say it looks like a spaceship. The drop is made, which looks like something totally exhilarating to experience.

As my son watches the other teams clean the engine pods and wings, he remarks it’s going to take a lot of Easy Off to get this done. Dustin and Kandice are the first to be approved and receive a clue to drive themselves to a naval base, find another escort, and drive to the next clue. Eric and Danielle finish as well, and Danny and Oswald worry when they are now by themselves. Mirna tells the guys on the drop plane they’re kind of in a race, so if they could only do all this kind of fast …

Danny and Oswald finish, and Oswald says he’s going to bring the sergeant over to tell his maid how to clean, as obviously he doesn’t know how to tell her. He also says he has a lot of respect for anyone that does this. Mirna and Charla finish and take a bus to the point where they will pick up a car. The beauty queens have already arrived there to pick up a car, and Eric and Danielle are right behind them.

Since this is the last lap before the final three, Danielle is getting nervous, not wanting to mess up. As Danny drives, Oswald shakes his head, looking at a map. Mirna and Charla stop to get directions, ending up following someone, saying whenever you work this hard, you want to be rewarded. The beauty queens arrive at the naval base, and choose a woman as they’re guide. They think it’s great she has her nails done, and say it’s great to find you can be in the Navy and have tough nails. They are driven to a Roadblock.

One member in each team will participate in a naval search and rescue training exercise. They’ll be given a GPS device, and will navigate the jungle to find an officer. After the officer programs additional information into the FPS, they’ll get a new course and follow this to a clearing. Here they will radio a request for pick up to a helicopter and will toss a smoke grenade to show their exact location. They’ll be picked up and delivered to where their teammate will be waiting.

As Dustin decides to do this Roadblock, Eric and Danielle are going crazy, and Oswald and Danielle stop for directions, asking to follow someone. Dustin goes off course, then corrects it, saying it’s like searching for an Easter basket. What kind of an elaborate set-up did her parents have in their living room for her to to think this? Eric and Danielle arrive and Danielle decides to do the task as Eric says it’s more suited for him, but he’s already done all his Roadblocks.

Charla and Mirna arrive and Charla decides to do it, wanting to save the last one for Mirna, not knowing what type of Roadblock it will be next time. Mirna tells Charla to not press any buttons on the GPS, and Charla says she understands, yet this is not an easy job in the beaming sun. She figures it’s no wonder all the military people get all those discounts, as they do too much for stuff. Dustin arrives at the hidden pilot and tells him she’s there to save him. As she gets the next coordinates, Charla is saying she doesn’t understand the GPS device.


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