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Freelance entertainment writer, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.

The Amazing Race All Stars, April 15th – Just Like Carl Douglas Said, Everybody Is Kung Fu Fighting


Mirna tells Eric she wants final three to be them and Oswald/Danny, and wants to leave the beauty queens out of it, playing his current distaste for the “dirty, dirty hookers” from last week. They all decide on a fun final three. Danny and Oswald are the only ones to get the first flight, and as promised, give their code for the next flight to Charla and Mirna, because they shared with them originally, and it all goes back to karma. When Danielle asks what they’re supposed to do now, Eric suggests they go stand in a puddle and drop a hair dryer.

As everyone else heads to the next ticket counter to try and talk someone into giving them tickets, Eric and Danielle say they’re already on standby, and head off to get their money changed. We hear the “uh-oh” music, and know they made a huge mistake here. Arriving at the counter after Dustin and Kandice, Mirna tells the Malaysia agent that their friends, Danny and Oswald, gave them their confirmation number, and they were first, so now she and Charla should be first as well. Dustin and Kandice argue that they were at the counter first and should now be first on the list.

Throughout much arguing, the beauty queens decide Mirna earns the pushy award of the year, and say they will make a “beauty queen sandwich” out of her. That’s a little odd. The beauty queens are the first to be awarded seats on the flight, and are told only the first two groups are going, which is them and Mirna/Charla. Eric and Danielle, who have now arrived at the ticket counter, don’t get tickets. They take the next best flight, while Danielle laments that it should be Mirna and Charla in their position.

Oswald and Danielle arrive in Hong Kong and take a taxi to the laundry, while Danny gets the driver to knock $100 off the fare. At the laundry, they find a Fast Forward and decide to do it. They’ve already done a Fast Forward along with Uchenna and Joyce, and while it used to be each team could only do one Fast Forward per Race, the rules changed once the Intersection was added to the Race. Teams can now do one Fast Forward in conjunction with another team, and one alone.

The Fast Forward sends Oswald and Danny to the old International Airport where they will sit in a stunt car while a professional stunt driver will do an action scene sequence. Once the car stops, they’ll receive the next clue. Oswald isn’t too sure about it. They both get gear taped up all over them, and Danny tells the driver he loves him, as Oswald tells him his mother wants him back. He also says it’s the only clean pair of pants he came with.

However, Oswald came to win. The driver takes them on a crazy course, then goes up a jump as the car flips over on its side. Danny and Oswald escape unharmed, and get a clue to travel directly to the pit stop, at the Hong Kong Jockey Club. The clue is hidden under a Travelocity gnome, so they bring that with them, as Danny thanks Oswald for being such a good sport through the Fast Forward.

As Charla/Mirna and the beauty queens arrive in Hong Kong, Charla uses her wheeled shoes to travel quickly through the airport, like so many kids I see walking around. She and Mirna get to the laundry first and decide “the boys” would have done the Fast Forward. They instead are met with a Detour – Kung Fu Fighting or Lost in Translation. In Kung Fu Fighting, the teams will travel to Tonkin Street and find a building with an 11 story bamboo scaffolding, which they will climb, avoiding the stunt kung fu experts that are engaged in an ongoing battle. In Lost in Translation, the teams will find a certain street, then search among hundreds of similar looking Chinese signs on the storefronts to match the one on their clue.

Originally, Mirna and Charla decide on Lost in Translation because Mirna doesn’t think Charla can race up the scaffolding, and the beauty queens arrive and decide on Kung Fu Fighting, saying they’ll only be in Hong Kong once. Mirna and Charla start looking for signs, and Charla says it’s going to be difficult. She disagrees that she’ll struggle with the climbing, comparing the experience to being like a monkey climbing bamboo. She convinces Mirna to switch the challenge, as they spend the second leg in a row of the Race switching their Detour choice, but their driver doesn’t know how to get to Tonkin Street.

Dustin and Kandice are already at the building, and begin their climb, knowing the stuntmen are going to try to intimidate them. Climbing, Dustin says she “karate chopped” one of the stuntmen, and I realize I have added insight here as a martial artist, but wouldn’t everyone know that chopping is with your hand and what she is clearly doing is a kick? They complete the task and receive a clue to take the Star Ferry to Hong Kong Island to the Old Police Headquarters.

At 3:20 PM, Eric and Danielle’s flight lands, and they decide they need to start badgering people. They know Mirna isn’t nice, and looking at how she’s gotten things, they think badgering people will get you far. They have it wrong, as they do badger people, but Eric and Danielle only badger each other. The cousins arrive at the building with Mirna still questioning how Charla is going to climb the scaffolding, saying that each step is longer than her legs. Yet, she didn’t question Charla putting on the one size fits all armor? As they climb, Mirna says they’re trying to make love, not war.


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