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Freelance entertainment writer, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.

The Amazing Race, April 1st – You Can Carry a Mannequin, But You Can't Carry a Tune


Eric and Danielle run up to the monument and onto the mat, as they are announced as team #5. Phil asks if they have lost their confidence, and they says they know they can win it if they stay with everyone else. Team Guido gets lost looking for the monument and know they are very far behind. Meanwhile, Uchenna and Joyce are leaving at 2:26 AM, and Uchenna offers up more sage wisdom, saying that the Jewish people taken from their homes and sent to Auschwitz is very poignant. Team Guido says they did their best and had a good time as they arrive on the mat, preparing for the worst. Phil confirms they are the last team to arrive, but is pleased to announce they aren’t being eliminated, but are instead marked for elimination. Bill hugs Phil, and Joe grabs Phil’s face and kisses him, with Phil telling him him to be careful where he’s going with that.

Joe says they are in an extraordinary situation there with tensions high, and they’re trying to figure out how they’re going to do this and climb out of it. They can’t make up 10, 12, 14, hours very easily, and can only do so much with the hand they’re dealt. In their first race, they were nineteen hours behind everyone else, and they never caught up. They’re trying hard to stay in a mindframe to think they can actually win it.

Mirna and Charla leave at 4:50 AM, knowing, like the others, that it’s going to be a really emotional time for them at Auschwitz. Uchenna and Joyce arrive at the bus depot and pull the last ticket for the first charter bus. Mirna and Charla arrive and pull a ticket for the second bus, leaving at 5 PM, realizing it puts them tied for last place. They hope to catch up with everyone else soon.

After the first bus leaves, Eric and Danielle depart at 1:50 PM. He says she’s not as focused as she could be. On their last race, she screwed around with Danni, but he wants her to be more intense like him. They find they have to wait around for the other bus at 5:00 PM, and Danielle suggests they go get a cup of coffee. Eric says he doesn’t want to spend any money. He’s not treating her like a girlfriend on the Race, but like a partner, he claims, yet I don’t remember him talking about Jeremy’s boobs all the time on the last race. Danielle is upset about the coffee, and he says she’s never been this far on the Race, and doesn’t realize cost could be a big thing. He keeps telling her to shut up as she says she is tired of being ignored every single day. It’s getting ridiculous, she thinks, to keep arguing over stupid little things, and she knows it’s going to hurt them, although it’s unclear whether she means their relationship or as a team.

Team Guido leaves at 3:32 PM with a goal to eliminate their nearest competition, which they figure to be Eric and Danielle. They feel the knowledge and brain power isn’t where it should be for Eric and Danielle, so realize to beat them it won’t be a footrace, but in knowledge. Arriving at the bus station, though, they can’t find the ticket dispenser and walk past it three times, as Joe says “son-of-a-bitch.” Why is it that people always make stupid mistakes after they talk about others being stupid? They greet the cousins on the bus, saying they haven’t seen them in days. Mirna says they all have to face what they’ll see at Auschwitz, as if they can’t, they won’t be learning from their past.

The first bus arrives at Auschwitz, and each team grabs a scroll with a story on it about what happened here. It talks about Adolph Hitler having more than one million people exterminated, more than in any other concentration camp. It stands today as a tribute to the people that perished. Oswald breaks up reading it. They are all required to light a candle on the railroad tracks. The beauty queens note it’s the last time a lot of the people saw their loved ones. Uchenna says what comes to his mind is all the books that never got written, ideas that never got tried, and relationships that never got to grow. He thinks it’s a good thing they haven’t destroyed it or taken it down, as God forbid it would ever happen again, and it stands as a good reminder.

The teams now travel by taxi to Krakow, Poland, to the Juliusz Slowacki Theatre to find their next clue. On the way, Oswald says Auschwitz was incredibly emotional for him, growing up as he did in a Communist country. It reminds him of where he could have ended up living for the rest of his life, and makes him grateful to be out of there. He now is in a place where he doesn’t have to be sorry about expressing himself as a person.

At the theatre, they find a Intersection, where teams are forced to join with each other in pairs until further notice. There is a Fast Forward here, and the two teams that do it will climb the tower of St. Marys as well as the Town Hall tower. They will count the stairs in both towers, add it together, and present the number to the guard. If they are correct, they will get the Fast Forward Award. Uchenna and Joyce join with Oswald and Danny, knowing it will mean the beauty queens are going to have to wait for one of the other teams to arrive, four hours later.


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