About LauraBelle

Freelance entertainment writer, martial arts instructor, and mother of two.

American Idol, January 31st – Sherman Poring On the Love


When Darold walks in for his audition, Simon tells him there was a lot of inappropriate behavior from his girlfriend, with her licking her lips, a suggestive song, getting down on her knees, etc. Darold says he’s not jealous. Just look at his teeth; why would he be jealous? I can’t even formulate a comment on that one. He sings David Ruffin’s I Wish It Would Rain, and Paula says she loves that song. It sounds more like talking at some points than singing, and when he is actually singing, it sounds bad. Simon asks if Darold and his girlfriend sing together at home, and if the police are called. Darold tells him it depends on what type of music they’re listening to. He gets 4 nos, and he and Sparkles agree they are still each other’s American Idols. It’s kind of cute and frightening at the same time.

Eric Mueller, 23, of Weest Covina, California, is ready, after training for the last two years. He likes to study Robert Plant, Staind, and Michael Jackson. He used the latter to figure out his featherweight vocals. What do those three artists have in common? It’s like he closed his eyes, and grabbed three CDs off the shelves at Wal Mart, two of which were probably in the bargain bin. Eric took what he could from the others, multiplied it, fluctuated it, and reverberated it. He wants it to sound like he knows what he’s doing, but I think he’s having the opposite effect.

I can’t even understand what he’s singing, it’s something in that featherweight vocal range, though. Simon asks if it was supposed to be serious, and Eric admits to it being a little loud. Simon wants to hear it lower, and he does, but it’s still a falsetto, and a bad one at that. Simon asks for lower, and he does it, with Randy saying lower isn’t going to make it right. He raises it back up again, and Simon doesn’t know what he’s singing either, but my son thinks it’s a Hilary Duff song. More from the bargain bin? Simon calls it absolutely atrocious, and as Eric is leaving, Simon spots something in his notes that says Eric learned to sing from Randy and Paula’s “instructional” DVD. A-ha. He picked this up in the bargain bin as well. He calls Eric back in and Paula and Randy convince him to leave. In the most fun from the whole evening, Simon takes chase with his notes, to find Eric with Ryan, but Paula and Randy are right behind him, trying to throw out a block. They say buh-bye, and Eric leaves again. Simon runs through the whole place trying to find Eric, assumably so he could taunt his co-stars with it a little more.

Nineteen more singers made it on this second day, although we didn’t see any of them. We’ve got one more day of auditions left, and we’ll be in San Antonio, Texas. I can only imagine what we’ll be met with next. Fore sure it will be more outrageousness, a touch of good, and probably some more heart, but none as big as Sherman Pore.

Thoughts about Idol you need to get off your chest? Email me at LauraBelle@realityshack.com

For more on American Idol, see LauraBelle’s Blog.


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