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And THIS Is Why I Love Reality TV: Don't Pity Mr. T



Long gone are the days of crazy Murdoch having to break out of a mental institution with the help of that doe-eyed, dirty boy Face under the direction of cigar-smokin Hannibal. No longer will we see that black van with the red stripe speed away with B. A. Baracas sneering behind the windshield, or maybe he was grimacing from being weighed down by so much gold. Yes, network television put to rest The A-Team a long time ago, but Mr. T, 80s icon, is still standing. Much like David Hasselhoff who we all love dearly, Mr. T has found his way into the world of reality television. Thank you, TV Land, for reruns of the A-Team, and, more importantly, for spotlighting Mr. T in his very own reality show!

In “I Pity The Fool,” Mr. T pities fools and then makes them into knowing, stand-up citizens of the world. He uses tough love and sparkly jewelry and his poof of a Mohawk to persuade them. Seriously, how old is Mr. T that he’s still sportin the Mohawk? I’ve seen interviews with him in which he explains the significance behind wearing that particular hairstyle as well as wearing thirty-four pounds of gold chain and rings. I don’t buy it. I think he thinks he’s one-of-a-kind and if he shaves the Mohawk and loses the gold, he won’t be anyone. Which is so not true. No one could ever replace Mr. T.

You know how some celebrities hate it if you bring up the one role they’re famous for? Like Neil Patrick Harris. Like David Cassidy. Thankfully, Mr. T is not like that. I mean, let’s get serious. No one knows him from T. J. Hooker. They know him as B. A. And he embraces that. Kinda like how Barry Williams embraces Greg Brady, only Mr. T acknowledges it with a smile while Barry will break out the fringed suede vest and sing Keep On Keep On Keep On. Mr. T is a good sport. That’s why he’s perfect for his own show.

The “I Pity The Fool” theme song and the opening credits are a compilation of Mr. T catchphrases and second-grade rhyming. He’s teachin fools the basic rules. He won’t take any jibber jabber. Don’t be a sucka. First name Mr. Last name T. I’m thinking Little Richard wrote the theme song and designed the opening credits. They make as much sense as he did on Celebrity Duets.

Mr. T is the perfect man for this show because he has always prided himself on being tough on the outside to those who are complete bastards and then being a big teddy bear and role model for everyone else. He runs a kind of boot camp for compassion and respect.

Sometimes he goes to people’s homes, talks to disrespectful adolescents, gives them guided tasks, and teaches them how to show love for their parents and respect for their elders. He also grunts a lot, smashes around pots and pans, and claps on the verge of tears when the youngins finally get it. Or he’ll teach husbands and wives to get along better with the same type of results.

Other times he goes to businesses and helps adults learn to communicate and respect each other. If Mr. T could teach all the adults I see day in and day out who act the fool how not to be fools, I would worship the ground he walks on. However, he doesn’t have that kind of time. No one does.

The goal of making people better citizens of the world is all well and good. The outfits Mr. T wears to do it in are not. He usually wears some sort of work-out gear and jogs around a lot. He also does these coming back from commercial recaps that are filled with puns. And as everyone around the Shack knows, I just love me some puns (and everyone knows just how sarcastic I am too). Mr. T will say something like, Sit back and have a cup of T while I recap the pity party up to now. And I cringe, I cringe!

Still, Mr. T is changing people’s lives for the better with or without puns.

[b]And THIS is why I love reality tv[/b]: It brings all my 80s celebrities back, better than ever. The void in our lives has been filled for now. Mr. T is back!

I wonder who’ll be back next. Email me with guesses at Christina@realityshack.com or chat about it in the forums. You can also [b] [url=http://christinamrau.blogspot.com]Live The Dream[/url] [/b] with me and delve into my own reality if you dare.


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