Let’s check in at the Sequester House, shall we? Marcellas arrives decked out in sunglasses and a suit jacket hanging over his shoulders, sighing, “Welcome to my banishment, my own personal hell. This is the worst experience of my life. I can only imagine how annoying these idiots are going to be with an infinity pool.” Oh whatever, Marcellas, cut the crap. You must have taken your acting lessons from Janelle. No one’s buying your Queen-Diva “I’m too cool for this place” act. Get over yourself. After al, he admits he likes being alone though. “I’m going to try to work on not being bitter this week so that once someone comes through the door, I can be somewhat friendly,” he says, adding, “God in heaven, I hope it’s not Howie.” Marcellas not being bitter? Yeah. Right. That’s as likely as Howie not being immature. When Howie shows up 24 hours later, he stands in the upstairs entryway and shouts down to Marcellas in the living room, “Ultimate betrayal!” Hearing the call, Marcellas looks up at Howie and screams, “No! No! No!” Howie runs downstairs as Marcellas whines, “Damn, paradise has just been lost.” Paradise? I thought you just said this was your “personal hell.” Howie settles in as Marcellas whines some more. “If I could swim the hell back to the United States, I would be in that sea right now battling sharks.” Howie and Marcellas watch the DVD of the past HoH competition, in which George won HoH. Marcellas watches in disbelief, while Howie constantly makes comments about people’s appearance: “fat,” “ugly,” “nasty,” etc. Marcellas is not amused. “Howie is a bully. He’s abrasive and disrespectful.” Howie insults everyone still in the house, slinging insults at everyone except Janelle. “Kiss my ass, Boogie!” Marcellas tells Howie, “Stop calling me Marci, I don’t like it. We’re not in the house anymore, I don’t have to be nice to you. My name is Marcellas. Howie apologizes, “Sorry, Mar-jealous.”
Boogie’s “show-mance” with Erika is disgusting, eye-offending, and “full-on,” according to Mike. “As long as she doesn’t get in my way of winning all the marbles, then I think everything’s going to be fine.” Will and Janelle’s flirtations are a little less repulsive and are more of a mindgame than anything else. “Janelle keeps me entertained,” says Will, “Honestly, I feel like I have Janelle wrapped around my finger. I feel like Janelle is in the palm of my hand.” But Will doesn’t trust Erika, as he feels she is “kissing everyone’s butt” and “playing Mike Boogie,” while Boogie thinks that Janelle could be “setting up a master play to come after Chill Town, and she’s doing that through her flirtations with Will.” Will recognizes that “Chill Town’s in a whole lot of trouble because our fate lies in the hands of these two girls.” He explains to Boogie, “We’re the Beatles. You’re John Lennon. I’m Paul McCartney. This week, we’re bringing Yoko into the Beatles. We just have to figure out who Yoko is. Are we bringing in Janelle or Erika?” He continues to joke. “James, he’s Ringo Starr. Chicken George? He’s in the Monkees.” It scares me when I realize there are readers and viewers who don’t understand that reference at all.
Julie talks privately with Boogie about being Head of Household. “One second, you’re gunning to get Janelle out of the house. The next, she’s apparently an honorary member of Chill Town. Where do you really stand with Janelle?” He says that it was wise to leave her in the game because she would provide a bigger target for the house than Chill Town would. “Do you trust her?” Not completely. “You and Will are the best of friends, but there might come a point where you may have to choose between friendship and a half million dollars. How prepared are you for that choice?” Boogie says he’s prepared to move toward the end at Will’s expense if necessary, but is hopeful that they both will make it to the final two. “You never got to exercise the power we call Coup D’État, but did it play into your strategy nonetheless?” He feels that the threat of the power was just as influential as the actual usage of the power and that it was smarter not to use it ultimately.
ChenBot asks James and George for their final words. James reminds everyone, “Some people are here to play so America will like them. Some people are here to play for votes and Sequester. I’m here to play the game. You guys know what you get with me. I’m a competitor,” while George is light-hearted, “Thanks for just keeping me here as long as you have. Cool beans!”
Time for the votes:
By a vote of 3-1, James has been evicted from the Big Brother: All-Stars house. James gives hugs all around, while George appears to be shocked that he was still in the house. Julie comments on how James was so sure that he was staying and asks him for his thoughts. “It’s All-Stars. I got beat by the best.” Chen goes on to quote some of his comments about Janelle: “dumb,” “a stupid bitch,” “a whore,” “an Anna-Nicole Smith wannabe.” Julie, you’ve done this for the Marcellas and Kaysar evictions too. Enough, we get it. It’s no shock that people don’t like Janelle. New topic, please. James admits that he got really mad at Janelle because he felt that he was thrown under the bus when she “sold him out” to Jase when James had given her information about the alleged Mr. & Mrs. Smith alliance, “sold him out” to Chill Town, and “sold him out” to Alison all within the first week. James believes that because his Season Six alliance lied to him about eviction nominations (Jase and later Diane), he had the right to betray them in the end. The good-bye messages to James were pleasant overall, with Danielle promising, “Chill Town has not seen the bad side of me yet. I will take care of them. I guarantee it.”
Chen announces the HoH Competition entitled, “But first.” The houseguests will have to judge whether the statements Julie reads are true or false. To indicate a true response, they will take a step up on their podium. If they think the answer is false, the competitors will take a step down. They are blindfolded, so they cannot see their housemates’ answers. An incorrect answer will eliminate a player from the game. The last houseguest standing will be crowned the new HoH.
“True or False: Howie called Mike ‘a punk’ before walking out the front door, but first, gnomes threw pies in the houseguests’ faces. If you think the statement is true, step up, if you think the statement is false, step down.” False. All five players get it right.
“True or False: The houseguests got dolled up for Prom Night, but first, the Grim Reaper made an ominous appearance.” True. George and Janelle are eliminated. Danielle, Will, and Erika remain.
“True or False: Jase refused to walk Nakomis to the door after eviction, but first, Kaysar became a human blueberry.” False. Danielle and Will are eliminated, making Erika the new HoH. Again. But for real this time. Heh. Erika and Danielle hug, and she whispers something in Danielle’s ear.
Back in the living room, Chen teases George about not being eliminated and having to endure another week of slop. However, “the slop diet is working for you, George, how much weight have you lost?” Twenty pounds! Julie asks Janelle how it feels to be the last person standing from Season Six. “It feels good, I guess… not really. I wish they were here.” Danielle then admits that she misses her family after 50+ days away from them.
Julie tells us that TWO evictions will take place next week. I think Erika could try to take down two of the strongest players, Will and Janelle, but who knows how well that would go? With all the alliances shifting around and Danielle potentially hunting for revenge… this once boringly-predictable season has suddenly become incredibly interesting.
Contact this personal Hell’s Angel at email@example.com