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Marcellas’ Last March – Big Brother 7: All Stars, August 17th


Julie talks privately with Janelle about being Head of Household. “You started to question James’ loyalty. What are your thoughts on him at this moment?” Janelle has lost a lot of trust in James and suspects that he may not be the ally he says he is. “I don’t know, I just want to see what happens after this week, I guess.” ChenBot continues, “What about Marcellas? You accused him of talking trash about you. What is your relationship with Marcellas now?” Janelle says she and Marcellas are mending their friendship. “Do you still have an alliance with him?” She doesn’t feel she can trust Marcellas anymore and wants to go the end with Season Six. Which is what she was going to do all along, in my opinion.

The houseguests have been attempting to guess the phrase to win the unknown power over the past week. After only one clue, four of the players have already made attempts. Danielle (“Do Not Assume”), Erika (“Do Not Assume”), James (“Pull the wool you’re your eyes”), and George (“You are expected to expect the unexpected.”) I’m going to pardon George on the account that he’s been eating all that slop and probably had a brain fart. Clue #2 is then revealed: an oversized needle and spool of thread, and Howie (“Wolf in sheep’s clothing”) and Boogie (“You reap what you sew”) submit their answers. Janelle waits until the third clue, the Grim Reaper, appears in the house, before making her guess, “You sow what you reap.” Ummm… yeah. Sure. Sorry Janelle, no pardons for you. Now I know why you dyed your hair blonde. It was so you’d have an excuse. Mike enters the Diary Room, where he is informed that he has won the Coup d’État. ChenBot explains, “You may exercise this power only once, and it’s valid for the next three evictions beginning tonight. Right before the voting takes place, I will ask if the person with this special power is prepared to use it. If you are, you will stand up and overthrow the Head of Household by replacing the two nominees with anyone you want. The only exceptions are the dethroned HoH and the Veto winner, who, as you know, are immune from being nominated. The vote will then take place immediately. Neither you nor the dethroned HoH will be allowed to vote. In the event of a tie, you will be the one to break it. Now, Big Brother will not reveal this power to the other houseguests until the day you choose to use it, so choose wisely.” “For the first time in forty days, I’m speechless,” says Boogie. Good. Now shut. Up.

Chen reveals to the houseguests that someone has won “an exceptional power, but only he or she knows what it is, and they are not allowed to reveal the power until the moment it’s used. If the winner would like to use this power tonight, please stand up now.” No one stands, and ChenBot asks Erika and Marcellas are for their final words. She reminds them that this evicted player will become the first jury member. The jury of seven will be responsible for declaring who is the winner of Big Brother: All-Stars. Erika says, “If you guys think you can use me in your strategy, then keep me around.” Marcellas? Any final melodramatic words? “No big speeches,” he begins. I doubt that. “We each get to choose how we play this game. If you want the game to be about lies and scumbagging each other, and you can live with that when it’s over, that’s great. I’ve tried to be honest,” Lie! “I’ve tried to be friends with everybody,” Lie! “and I hope that you guys know that’s what I wanted. So if you can lie to me in my face, send me out under these circumstances, that’s all I can do… All I can say is please.” Apparently you can say a lot more than that.

Time for the votes:
Mike – Marcellas
Howie – James… just kidding… Mar-jealous… er… Marcellas
James – Marci… er… Marcellas
Will – Marcellas
George – Marcellas
Danielle – Marcellas

By a vote of 6-0, Marcellas has been evicted from the Big Brother: All-Stars house. He gives a quick kiss to Danielle on the cheek and makes a hasty exit out the door.

Julie greets Marcellas outside and comments on his afro wig. She asks him for his thoughts on Janelle. “The girl lies as much as she breathes.” Chen goes on to quote some of his comments about Janelle: “the head cheerleader from hell,” and “I want to rip out her black heart and shove it down Will’s cold, stupid heart.” Marcellas admits that his comments were extreme but that he tried to play the game without talking so much trash. Uh… what? Did I just hear that correctly? “That’s what did me in. I wasn’t talking.” ExCUSE me? Now it’s time for ME to pull out an “Oh no you di’nt” on you. You did NOT just spend each and every one of your Diary Room sessions coming up with clever ways to rip on your housemates, go all-OUT on Jase in the backyard, and have a late-night soap-opera stereotype-writing contest with Janelle at the viewing board, and now come here and tell ME that you weren’t talking?! Oh helllllll naw. Marcellas watches his good-bye videos and says he has let go of his anger toward Danielle. He “reluctantly” heads off to the “tacky” sequester house.

ChenBot announces that this week is a Double Eviction week, meaning that whoever wins the HoH must nominate two people for eviction immediately and the next houseguest will be going home on Sunday. The HoH Competition looks like a high school prom night. America has voted Janelle as Prom Queen. Of course. Bleh. As she is the outgoing HoH, Janelle is ineligible to compete, but she sits and enjoys her prom crown and bouquet.

High school students vote for superlatives like “Most Likely to Succeed.” I don’t remember “Most Likely to Die Alone” and “Most Likely to be Mistaken for Furniture” being on that list in high school, but Big Brother felt the need to include these. America voted for which titles each of the houseguests should receive. Julie will ask questions based on these votes, and the players will answer by raising their left or right hands. If they get the answer correct, they can step forward onto the next star of their individual path. If they get the answer wrong, they have to remain where they are. The first person to reach the last star or be in the lead after eight questions will be the next Head of Household. The competitors don their blindfolds and prepare for the first question.

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